Devilyn Caster Posted January 18, 2016 Report Share Posted January 18, 2016 (edited) The First Order of Bromance Accords [spoiler]Dear Diary, I met a guy named Hux today in Lunch. He has read Nietzche he says. Everyone should read Nietzche he says. Dear Diary, Sat with Hux again at lunch today. He agrees that the destruction of Alderaan was justified. I ask him if he wants to come to Hot Topic with me later to look at some vintage Imperial Posters. Dear Diary, Mom and Dad still don’t believe that my name is Kylo. Dad laughs whenever I say it. Nobody at school calls me Kylo but Hux. Hux is alright but he likes Tarkin too much. Tarkin is nowhere near as cool as Vader. Dear Diary, I am taking Grandpa’s helmet to school today to show to Hux at lunch. I expect he will be quite impressed. It’s pretty Wizard. Dear Diary, Today Hux and I are wearing black to commemorate the defeat at the Battle of Endor. We both always wear black but today it means more. At lunch Hux read part of his manifesto to me. It covers a lot of ground. Dear Diary, Hux and I are meeting up by our lockers for an exchange of gifts. I got him a moleskine to write his speeches in. I hope he likes it. Dear Diary, Hux got me a poster of Darth Vader for my locker. I already have one just like it but bigger; however, I appreciate the thought. Dear Diary, Hux and I have made Livejournal accounts. His name is Starkiller; mine is xXxVaderxXx. Dear Diary, My dad knocked over my model Death Star and broke it, but he didn’t apologize. He said people should stop making Death Stars. I’m shaking. Dear Diary, I told Hux what my dad said about Death Stars and he’s coming over for moral support. We’re going to build a new Death Star in place of the one that broke. Hux says if we don’t it lets them win. It’s nice to have friends.[/spoiler] It’s not easy being the only two kids at school who wear black and believe that the Imperials were right. Sometimes, you just need to have one friend who really gets you. Whether it’s running from your family dinner parties with Wookies or reading up on the latest speech giving techniques, Both Hux and Kylo are glad to have someone with whom they can commiserate. In this spirit, we sign The First Bromance of Order Accords. Article I. I just don’t think girls GET why Darth Vader is so great Having a friend to talk about different shades of black and your cool ass grandfather is pretty great when NO ONE else seems to care. MI6 and NSO pledge to be respectful of one another, particularly when their heritage is so cool. Besides, if you’re nice enough Hux might let you fly around in his Star Destroyer. Article II: Hux says women are a distraction You meet this sweet Goth girl at the Hot Topic and now you want to write dark poetry for her and scribble your names in ink on each others binders. But Hux knows that all this time you’re wasting on this space wench is time you could be using to improve your slot efficiency (62%?!?! are you trying to make us look bad?). Realizing that the only way you’ll rule the high school and show those popular pricks who’s not afraid of his destiny is with a gigantic planetary laser that draws its power from the sun, Hux and Kylo agree to share their economic resources. Article III: You can’t really appreciate the Imperial March until you’ve heard it on Vinyl Friends let their other friends borrow their stuff. Whether it’s a mint copy of some original Galactic Empire vinyl from your dad’s collection, or one of Hux’s inspirational books about order and fascism (all of which are HUGE disappointments by the way, zero mentions of Darth Vader), Hux and Kylo pledge to share all of their stuff with one another. This includes petty rumors from those wannabe resistance thugs. They think they’re so cool. Article IV: Passive Aggressive Glaring Sometimes, your dad is gonna do his dad thing and force you to go to the school dance. This is egregious and only serves to show how little he knows about you. It’s not like you would dance anyways. And while you would appreciate Hux coming to spend his time with you, glaring in judgement at those wannabes on the dance floor, you respect his right to choose to stay at home and play with his galactic space armies. Similarly, if Hux wants you to help him make the peons witness the firepower of his fully armed and operational battle station, he knows that some days you just need to write passive aggressive lyrics in your journal. Alone. Article V: Current Status: In a Sarlaac Pit, but emotionally Having friends is a new experience, and is always subject to change. What happens when you wear new liquid eyeliner and Hux starts quoting Marx? Will your friendship continue? Will it change forever? After a period of four months, the treaty will expire, unless both Hux and Kylo agree to advance the relationship. Article VI: Diary, I think this is for the best Maybe the way he quotes Nietzche starts to get on your nerves. Or maybe the way he throws a fit and destroys all of your navigational and weapons stations on your star destroyer really grates you (those are expensive, okay). Whatever the case may be, both alliances agree that sometimes friendships end. If either of them want to terminate their relationship, they must provide the other with 48 hours notice and some dark lyrics that express the ways in which the relationship went wrong. Signed for MI6 Hux Chimaera, M Mergerberger, M Devilyn Caster, 001 Piejonk, 002 Gorniar, 003 Gopherbashi, 004 Kerschbs, 005 James Bond, 007 Signed for NSO Kylo Joe Stupid, Emperor Spartacus, Dark Lord Rayvon, Sith Lord Adolph Mussolini, Sith Lord The Listener, Sith Lord [spoiler] https://twitter.com/kylor3n?lang=en[/spoiler] Edited January 18, 2016 by Devilyn Caster Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neo Uruk Posted January 18, 2016 Report Share Posted January 18, 2016 Usually I'd laugh but hey at least you're doing things. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Margrave Posted January 18, 2016 Report Share Posted January 18, 2016 best written treaty of 2016 candidate right thar Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rabonnobar Posted January 18, 2016 Report Share Posted January 18, 2016 Do you want to build a death star? Do you? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gibsonator21 Posted January 18, 2016 Report Share Posted January 18, 2016 It's about fucking time lol congrats guys! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
johnap88 Posted January 18, 2016 Report Share Posted January 18, 2016 congrats you two Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Saladjoe Posted January 18, 2016 Report Share Posted January 18, 2016 Glad to see MI6 making some moves post war, congrats to both parties. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hereno Posted January 18, 2016 Report Share Posted January 18, 2016 Dear Diary,Hux and I have made Livejournal accounts. His name is Starkiller; mine is xXxVaderxXx.Dear Diary,My dad knocked over my model Death Star and broke it, but he didn’t apologize. He said people should stop making Death Stars. I’m shaking. i lol'd at these but really it isn't funnygrats yall Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JohnGulager Posted January 18, 2016 Report Share Posted January 18, 2016 Good stuff here o/ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Varianz Posted January 18, 2016 Report Share Posted January 18, 2016 Well this is probably not surprising to a single person. Nice to see it finally up. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Master Holton Posted January 18, 2016 Report Share Posted January 18, 2016 I was promised a hilarious and brilliantly-written treaty. It was delivered. Congrats to both parties and very nicely written. One of the few walls-of-text I've actually read recently rather than skimmed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lurunin Posted January 18, 2016 Report Share Posted January 18, 2016 Just saw this, grats to all! ...except Kill.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MitchellBade Posted January 18, 2016 Report Share Posted January 18, 2016 Thank you Non Grata for your stamp of approval Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheListener Posted January 18, 2016 Report Share Posted January 18, 2016 Good to see this finally done. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KahlanRahl Posted January 18, 2016 Report Share Posted January 18, 2016 I have always wondered why this wasn't a given from the start. We have so much in common. I'm happy to see this finally go through. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rabonnobar Posted January 18, 2016 Report Share Posted January 18, 2016 Shoutout to youwish's target list skills Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Helbrecht Posted January 18, 2016 Report Share Posted January 18, 2016 Congratulations you two. PS: Black is pretty awesome. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shurukian Posted January 18, 2016 Report Share Posted January 18, 2016 Congrats, all! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Isolatar Posted January 18, 2016 Report Share Posted January 18, 2016 Genuinely surprised why this hasn't been posted earlier. o/ NSO o/ MI6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Unknown Smurf Posted January 18, 2016 Report Share Posted January 18, 2016 (edited) This changes everything. Edited January 18, 2016 by Unknown Smurf Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vladimir Poutine Posted January 18, 2016 Report Share Posted January 18, 2016 i lol'd at these but really it isn't funny grats yall Wow guys a semi-compliment from Hereno guys. We should celebrate. :nuke: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Zigur Posted January 18, 2016 Report Share Posted January 18, 2016 Have fun, younglings. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spartacus1082 Posted January 18, 2016 Report Share Posted January 18, 2016 We only signed this treaty so I could be tied to Dev one more time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Master Hakai Posted January 18, 2016 Report Share Posted January 18, 2016 I like one of these alliances, and it's nso. Bet you can't guess what the other one is! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sir Kiloist Posted January 18, 2016 Report Share Posted January 18, 2016 Well hello NSO. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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