HeroofTime55 Posted November 13, 2012 Report Share Posted November 13, 2012 (edited) How easy it is to forget that CN is a dumb internet game, isn't it? How we act as if our column in the Grand Spreadsheet is going to have any impact in our lives... Unless, of course, we let it. Which, sometimes, some of us do. I'm gonna do something different. Hello. I suffer from, among other things, ADHD, OCD, Bipolar, Anxiety disorders, Severe suicidal depression, and probably Aspergers. I have serious trust issues, I have extreme paranoia, and I am totally clueless when it comes to social skills. Over the past year, these issues of mine, many as they are, manifested in this game, and I slowly lost everything that was dear to me - My education, relationships, my alliance, and more meaningful IRL friendships than I care to count. And all of it traces back to CN as a sort of nexus of my suffering and pain. Because my broken personality was applied to the one field where it could wreak the most havoc: A political battleground. And then the lines separating the game from RL were blurred, and it bled through. CN is an addiction, and as of the past year, it has become a chore. My presence is painful for me, and I have finally - thanks to a few people who, not knowing the walking disaster that I am, decided to stick with me anyway - concluded that it is time to quit. I am going to get therapy for my many, many issues, and I am going to cut the first troublesome area of my life, out of my life - and that is the ugly politics of CN. By the time I am sane enough to come back, I doubt the game will still exist. This will probably be the last few days that you will see me at all. If any of you, for whatever misguided reason, wish to stay in touch, the best ways to contact me are via Skype and Steam (both are "herooftime55," as well as that being my handle most anywhere else I am present), via my hotmail account or my MSN (the aforementioned, simply append "@hotmail.com"), or the website that was most recently used as the alliance forums for United Equestria. I may also continue to lurk on IRC in #ponies. If I could go back a year and not $%&@ things up like I have, I would. But life doesn't work like that. One has to take their lessons, try to improve, and move on to something new. Thanks for the 6 years. Farewell. Edited November 13, 2012 by HeroofTime55 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Furril Posted November 13, 2012 Report Share Posted November 13, 2012 http://sports.espn.go.com/nfl/news/story?id=3276034 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
D34th Posted November 13, 2012 Report Share Posted November 13, 2012 Good bye and good luck. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shimanaka Posted November 13, 2012 Report Share Posted November 13, 2012 o7 See you around, buddy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chachonimrod Posted November 13, 2012 Report Share Posted November 13, 2012 Sure hope you mean it this time, for your own sake. Good luck with your real life. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beauty Posted November 13, 2012 Report Share Posted November 13, 2012 Peace HoT :/ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dvdcchn Posted November 13, 2012 Report Share Posted November 13, 2012 best luck HoT Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jgoods45 Posted November 13, 2012 Report Share Posted November 13, 2012 Best wishes in the real world! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mogar Posted November 13, 2012 Report Share Posted November 13, 2012 Got to fix your real life troubles before you can deal with this game's drama, my extended vacation taught me this lesson, I'm hopeful you will work through everything. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jerdge Posted November 13, 2012 Report Share Posted November 13, 2012 Recover your self-esteem, man, you're not really as bad as all that! Considering your own account about yourself it's probably better that you don't come back at all, though. RL is better, anyway. Take care. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cataduanes Posted November 13, 2012 Report Share Posted November 13, 2012 Best of luck. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
President S O Posted November 13, 2012 Report Share Posted November 13, 2012 Take care of yourself IRL. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hiro Nakara Posted November 13, 2012 Report Share Posted November 13, 2012 (edited) I thought this day would never come, thank you! Also, you have an empty slot, I suggest you use it by hitting me. This would please me as much as you leaving this realm. Or GATO could be charitable and let me have a piece of HoT? Edited November 13, 2012 by Hiro Nakara Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jkellz Posted November 13, 2012 Report Share Posted November 13, 2012 At the end of the day, the Royal Canterlot Guard, and Bon Bon Clone #34 go back in the same box, or something like that....... Best of luck IRL, the biggest game of drama you'll ever take part of. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Goldie Posted November 13, 2012 Report Share Posted November 13, 2012 Taking applications to re-name the third division of The Righteous Orators Legacy League. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
porksaber Posted November 13, 2012 Report Share Posted November 13, 2012 take it easy, take it easy... don't let the sound of your own wheels drive you crazy. lighten up while you still can don't even try to understand etc. tl;dr? take it easy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kerschbs Posted November 13, 2012 Report Share Posted November 13, 2012 Best of luck in RL. Therapy can do wonders for people with diagnosed social issues and it sounds like you are on the right track to stabilizing yourself into a more healthy lifestyle (and I mean that in the best way possible.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brehon Posted November 13, 2012 Report Share Posted November 13, 2012 Wish you nothing but the best HoT o/ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HeroofTime55 Posted November 13, 2012 Author Report Share Posted November 13, 2012 Thanks for the well wishes everyone. I woke up today, with sort of a lingering "okay, what the hell did I do this time" feeling. But you know what? No regrets. I hit the declare war button on an impulse, because if I thought about it too much, I would have turned myself away from it out of attachment to a couple silly numbers. This way, I've forced myself to quit. And that's a very good thing, because I very much need to. The lot of you have been a wonderful community, and I likewise wish you all the best. Who knows, maybe I come back in 3 or 4 years, and admin finally got off his lazy ass between that time and made this game into something? You never know guys, miracles can happen. Until then, peace. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roadie Posted November 13, 2012 Report Share Posted November 13, 2012 RL is ultimately the other thing that matters. All of us should do whatever it takes to make the best RL for ourselves that we can. In the end you'll be glad that you chose to dig in there and not here. BiPolar can be a beast, HoT. Take care of yourself. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thalayk Posted November 13, 2012 Report Share Posted November 13, 2012 In the immortal words of Journey, be good to yourself when nobody else will. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
King Xander the Only Posted November 13, 2012 Report Share Posted November 13, 2012 Don't look back. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
King Brandon Posted November 13, 2012 Report Share Posted November 13, 2012 Just lol@this Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Omniscient1 Posted November 13, 2012 Report Share Posted November 13, 2012 Good luck out there. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HalfEmpty Posted November 13, 2012 Report Share Posted November 13, 2012 By HOT always liked 'ya. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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