Sabcat Posted March 8, 2014 Report Share Posted March 8, 2014 /me mentally kicks himself for getting involved in this oh-so-entertaining thread There clearly is a need here for a primer on how and why FAN rolls. My apologies in advance to the old-timers here who are well-versed in FAN philosophy – come on over to iirc and I’ll pour you some cider in recompense. First off, let me say: This is our fault. It’s our fault that there are so many noobs here that are saying, “Oh the noez! Who is FAN and why are they attacking UoCR?” because FAN has kept to itself. In the recent past, we’ve had no interest in being involved with Planet Bob shenanigans – even its wars, which is saying something because FAN typically likes a good fight. That’s rule number 1 for the noobs: FAN plays CN to fight. CN without fighting is emo BS. Rule #2 is that, with some very specific limitations, FAN nations can do whatever the heck they want. It’s what makes us so good at war – we just point the dogs in the general direction of the fox and let the dogs do their thing. So here’s how the UoCR business went down. I’ll give you a one-time peek behind the curtain to understand our motivations here. 1) One of our junior members said, “Hey, there’s a nation called Soviet USA. He belongs to some alliance called Union of Communist Republics and it has X members, but can I attack him anyway?” 2) We check out their forum, and low and behold, these guys aren’t just players role-playing Commies in CN, they are actually RL Communists who believe that Communism is good for all! WTF? 3) mpol, as a member of Congress, puts up a vote to go to war against Soviet USA’s entire alliance. The only reason mpol beat me to it was because I was busy extracting the ice pick from my eyes after seeing the homage to Communism that is UoCR’s forum. 4) Vote passes unanimously in about 2 hours. Congress sends the bill to our Servers who look it over, say, “Hell yes!” and direct our military to plan our war. 5) We kick around end-game and surrender terms. $441M in reps was considered (94,000,000 people killed by Communism in the 20th Century times $4 and change -- what the material value of a human body is), but ultimately settle on the following: An admission in UoCR’s OWF surrender announcement that RL Communism is bad period. UoCR must place an order for Freedom Fries in their surrender announcement Continuation of the current wars until they expire ‘cause the war itself is reward enough for us. 6) About 18 hours after our initial attack, UoCR leadership (RA and KI) approach us about surrendering. We give them our terms and have yet to receive an answer. The rest, as they say, is history. History, for my UoCR friends, is the study of things that happened in the past. So there was no “UoCR just finished a war and now is the time to attack” or “What are the implications for Planet Bob if we attack” concerns. Heck, we were barely aware that a decent-sized war had just ended. RL Commies came onto our radar screen, and we figured we’d be doing everyone here a favor by Darwin-Awarding these imbeciles who actually RL believe in the single most brutal, failed political system that ever cursed the Earth. Frankly, I’m disappointed that the rest of Planet Bob has tolerated them for so long. So ultimately, it was Soviet USA's fault. tl;dr: "We're as dumb as we look" If what you consider "wars" and "fighting" is smacking around an alliance 1/10th your size immediately after the last global, then it's no wonder you're all so bored. It also explains their woefully low casualty numbers. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Commander shepard Posted March 8, 2014 Report Share Posted March 8, 2014 The shit really hit the fan in this thread. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
saxasm Posted March 8, 2014 Report Share Posted March 8, 2014 I hope that someone gets involved and punches FAN's teeth in. At least their arrogant drivel would come with a funny speech impediment. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neo Uruk Posted March 8, 2014 Report Share Posted March 8, 2014 $441M in reps was consideredYou've got to be shitting me. but ultimately settle on the following: An admission in UoCR’s OWF surrender announcement that RL Communism is bad period. UoCR must place an order for Freedom Fries in their surrender announcement Continuation of the current wars until they expire You've got to be shitting me. We give them our terms and have yet to receive an answer.Here's a hint: your terms are ridiculous and no self-respect alliance would accept them.The rest, as they say, is history. History, for my UoCR friends, is the study of things that happened in the past.haha epic bacon they are owned!!!! RL Commies came onto our radar screen, and we figured we’d be doing everyone here a favor by Darwin-Awarding these imbeciles who actually RL believe in the single most brutal, failed political system that ever cursed the Earth. You've got to be fucking shitting me Frankly, I’m disappointed that the rest of Planet Bob has tolerated them for so long. So ultimately, it was Soviet USA's fault.You. Have. Got. To. Be. Shitting. Me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Branimir Posted March 8, 2014 Report Share Posted March 8, 2014 (edited) Ooc- Ignorance about what communism is is still staggering. It is though understandable. There never was a communist country actually that is an oxymoron. Just because some called themselves communist doesnt make them so. Declarations and labels are pointless empty things. Thinking communism isnt a bad things isnt a problem, thinking Stalin or Mao were good guys is. Ic-Hello FAN Edited March 8, 2014 by Branimir Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ditchboy00 Posted March 8, 2014 Report Share Posted March 8, 2014 You've got to be !@#$ting me. You've got to be !@#$ting me. You've got to be !@#$@#$ !@#$ting me You. Have. Got. To. Be. !@#$ting. Me. Oh it's damn true. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neo Uruk Posted March 8, 2014 Report Share Posted March 8, 2014 Oh it's damn true.I didn't win a gold medal for people to do this shit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The R00STER Posted March 8, 2014 Report Share Posted March 8, 2014 Ooc- Ignorance about what communism is is still staggering. It is though understandable. There never was a communist country actually that is an oxymoron. Just because some called themselves communist doesnt make them so. Declarations and labels are pointless empty things. Thinking communism isnt a bad things isnt a problem, thinking Stalin or Mao were good guys is. Ic-Hello FAN This man is smart. The true concept of communism is a beautiful thing. It is also a concept the world hasn't truly seen. That saidI know many of the UCR guys and can say for a fact that many of them are good old fashioned, God fearing, democracy loving, Americans. So FAN's claim that they are [ooc/RL commies/] is complete b.s. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phil Coulson Posted March 8, 2014 Report Share Posted March 8, 2014 Hey you guys asked why FAN attacked. Now you know. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pax Animi Posted March 8, 2014 Report Share Posted March 8, 2014 The first 7 pages were all praise for FAN. Now FAN members through their posting have ruined it. :U Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TurnipCruncher Posted March 8, 2014 Report Share Posted March 8, 2014 There never was an "actual" national socialist country... Nothing bad attached to the name etc...you know the rest. Calling BS on that argument right now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neo Uruk Posted March 8, 2014 Report Share Posted March 8, 2014 Hey you guys asked why FAN attacked. Now you know.I didn't care why they declared. Now that I know the collective brain cells involved in making the DoW is about equal to the amount of credits required to become a college sophomore, it's fucking hilarious. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dochartaigh Posted March 8, 2014 Report Share Posted March 8, 2014 Yeah did not care about this originally but yeah, don't like hitting people IC for OOC reasons. Poor show FAN. Didn't like it when TPF did it to NoV, don't like it now. Here's to hoping that Old Guard kicks in the teeth of your upper tier until you are forced to praise everything that is communism. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phil Coulson Posted March 8, 2014 Report Share Posted March 8, 2014 I don't know, I find something kind of refreshing about admitting they have a stupid reason or no reason for attacking as opposed to pretending to have a better reason. It beats using a three alliance oA chain. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nooob Posted March 8, 2014 Report Share Posted March 8, 2014 Ooc- Ignorance about what communism is is still staggering. It is though understandable. There never was a communist country actually that is an oxymoron. Just because some called themselves communist doesnt make them so. Declarations and labels are pointless empty things. Thinking communism isnt a bad things isnt a problem, thinking Stalin or Mao were good guys is. Ic-Hello FAN The UCR and non of it's allies think highly of Stalin or Mao. Heck, not a lot of people are actual communists IRL, but just left wing in general. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Zigur Posted March 8, 2014 Report Share Posted March 8, 2014 Dont see much more than peanut gallery commentary. Until someone takes leadership like with Mushqaeda, its all just background noise to FAN. :POPCORN: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neo Uruk Posted March 8, 2014 Report Share Posted March 8, 2014 Dont see much more than peanut gallery commentary. Until someone takes leadership like with Mushqaeda, its all just background noise to FAN. :popcorn:An uninformed post per usualI don't know, I find something kind of refreshing about admitting they have a stupid reason or no reason for attacking as opposed to pretending to have a better reason. It beats using a three alliance oA chain.No, it really doesn't "beat" anything. It shows that they're a bottom 5 alliance as far as brainpower is concerned. Hell, they aren't even the renowned ~war machine~ of old. People like them based on the fact they got their shit kicked in seven years ago. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Max Power Posted March 8, 2014 Report Share Posted March 8, 2014 [OOC]Am I the only one who thinks FAN is doing an absolutely brilliant job RPing McCarthyism? It's a really cool angle for a gun-themed alliance to take.[/OOC] If what you consider "wars" and "fighting" is smacking around an alliance 1/10th your size immediately after the last global, then it's no wonder you're all so bored. UCR wasn't in the last global war, only in Kas. tl;dr: "We're as dumb as we look" It also explains their woefully low casualty numbers. Oh look, a tech seller is acting tough. Cute. The !@#$ really hit the fan in this thread. Just the best pun that could have possibly been made. I don't know, I find something kind of refreshing about admitting they have a stupid reason or no reason for attacking as opposed to pretending to have a better reason. It beats using a three alliance oA chain. Good point. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Zigur Posted March 8, 2014 Report Share Posted March 8, 2014 Well, if NSO were to take the lead, Id be glad they embrace the cause of global stability after all. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nooob Posted March 8, 2014 Report Share Posted March 8, 2014 Well, if NSO were to take the lead, Id be glad they embrace the cause of global stability after all. Like you give a fucking shit about global stability. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gravitas Posted March 8, 2014 Report Share Posted March 8, 2014 Surprise - this is is still an IC forum. Further references to "RL," some place called "Earth," or any other OOC/Earth history comments will result in warns. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Zigur Posted March 8, 2014 Report Share Posted March 8, 2014 Like you give a !@#$@#$ !@#$ about global stability. What do you believe global stability means? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChairmanHal Posted March 8, 2014 Report Share Posted March 8, 2014 [OOC]Am I the only one who thinks FAN is doing an absolutely brilliant job RPing McCarthyism? It's a really cool angle for a gun-themed alliance to take.[/OOC] OOC: If FAN were kicking people from government and punishing members for conspiring (or alleged conspiring based on association) with UCR and other Communist alliances, you'd be spot on. This is actually more akin to the aggressive policy of containment followed by the U.S. from the 1950s on. I don't know, I find something kind of refreshing about admitting they have a stupid reason or no reason for attacking as opposed to pretending to have a better reason. It beats using a three alliance oA chain. It also beats ganging up on 1-2 nations in easy odds mash downs near the top of the food chain. FAN actually took a risk in attacking here. I salute the effort, whatever the outcome. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wobblies Posted March 8, 2014 Report Share Posted March 8, 2014 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neo Uruk Posted March 8, 2014 Report Share Posted March 8, 2014 It also beats ganging up on 1-2 nations in easy odds mash downs near the top of the food chain.lmao @ you still being buttfurious that DBDC destroyed your pixelsFAN actually took a risk in attacking here.If by "took a risk," you mean "is being incredibly petty, and avoided attacking the largest communist alliance because they didn't want to take a risk", then you're spot on!Oh look, a tech seller is acting tough. Cute.Average FAN supporter post. Good point.It is absolutely not a good point. Coming up with a CB that isn't akin to [ooc: ooc stalking] being really creepy about someone's personal beliefs would be a lot better. I preferred the faked "Dilber is plotting" logs to this shit. At least there's an effort in trying to convince people based on those! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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