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Open Letter to the Patrons of King Neptune's Bar


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An open letter to the Patrons of King Neptune's Bar from the transitional coalition herein known as 'Ordo Hereticus'

 

On behalf of each of the alliances currently engaged in military action against your watering hole; this letter serves to address the recent 'surrender' made by your leader and present a reasonable course of action which shall result in a lasting peace between us. Let us first address the 'surrender' itself. The coalition Ordo Hereticus (Cobra; Ordo Cyberneticus; The Phoenix Federation; Haven; The Imperial Entente and Kashmir) do collectively acknowledge that King Neptune's Bar are offering their surrender, however it should be made clear that this is not accepted and does not entail a cessation of hostilities. For the following reasons:

 

  • The statement by Lord Hitchcock was made unilaterally and did not receive the blessing from any of the alliances currently engaged with you. If you truly desire peace from us, then we need to actually agree on how/when it will happen. 
  • The statement was laden with ill-conceived barbs which do not reflect the candour of someone who should be surrendering. If you find yourself in a bar fight and your opponent admits "Okay I lose" to get you to lower your fists, but then proceeds to hock an empty glass in your direction followed by more mouthy verbal barbs- does that sound like someone who you'd walk away from who has truly surrendered, or someone who needs another pint glass in their eye? 
  • If any other alliance were to make such a statement dictating their own surrender/victory unilaterally, it would not be accepted by the other party. Were the shoe on the other foot? I would not expect my opponent to ever actually go along with it.

 

With these points in mind, and as our benevolence knows no bounds; we have a proposition for you which we hope will:

a) Serve as a method of verifying your surrender to grant you the peace you seek.

b) Bury the hatchet and put this mess behind us.

c) Provide a necessary cathartic festival to engage in wherein no demands are made, no admissions of guilt are expected and no trace of bad blood will taint any future interaction.

 

 

The proposal is as follows:

  • King Neptune's Bar and Ordo Hereticus shall present a set number of their champions to engage in a final bout of war, the amount of participants will be determined once KNB have agreed to this proposal.
  • Each participating champion in this festival will engage militarily under either King Neptune's Bar or Ordo Hereticus' alliance affiliation only.
  • Each alliance may recruit [***] of their champion(s) externally should they see fit.
  • There will be no restrictions on external funding. As there is no point in engaging in a duel with someone who has run out of money for bullets.
  • The respective champions shall be decided upon and confirmed publicly in advance of the launch date of the festivities and the combat will extend no further than to those chosen by each of the respective parties.
  • The duel shall last for 1 or 2 rounds (champion's preference) and no longer. Upon conclusion of this festival to celebrate the end of hostilities; both parties shall dust themselves off, shake hands and part ways with dignity. The surrender of King Neptune's Bar will then be accepted by the undersigned parties and all hatchets buried deep in the skulls of the fallen.

 

We hope that this proposal will serve as the necessary catharsis which our respective alliances and affiliated parties clearly need in order to consider our dispute settled appropriately. Should you decide against this proposal? It will be business as usual and a state of war will persist.

 

You have a choice: Choose your champions and end our fight properly in good humour and good spirits. Or; stomp your feet, refuse, throw further barbs which will only exacerbate tensions and simply prolong your state of total war with us. If you truly surrender and seek peace? This is your chance to get it, as well as participate in a fairly staged festival of bloodshed for the casualty god and share an opportunity to gain some mutual respect for one another on this cold, dying planet before we go our separate ways.

 

We look forward to your response.

 

[***] - To be determined upon KNB consenting to this arrangement.

 

Signed on behalf of the coalition once known as Ordo Hereticus:

 

Johnny Apocalypse, King Cobra

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Tankobite, Prince Imperial of the Imperial Entente

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Kapleo, Evil Overlord of The Phoenix Federation

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Todor Jivkov, Avenging Angel of Haven

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Sir William, King of Kashmir

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Martialis, Lord High Admiral of Ordo Cyberneticus

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Edited by Johnny Apocalypse
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Well if this isnt the most unoriginal post I've ever read. Minus the decom of the SDI, you basically took what CLAWS gave to Lucious and applied them to KNB. Bravo on that originality. Eat any creativity lately?

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Just now, Liltrekkie said:

Well if this isnt the most unoriginal post I've ever read. Minus the decom of the SDI, you basically took what CLAWS gave to Lucious and applied them to KNB. Bravo on that originality. Eat any creativity lately?

 

Except we aren't expecting KNB to tie one hand behind their back and are encouraging circumstances where it's able to be a fairly pitched fight between us and not punitive.

 

Concluding a war with a set amount of rounds is not an uncommon phenomenon in CN history and not exclusive to CLAWS.

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5 minutes ago, Johnny Apocalypse said:

 

Except we aren't expecting KNB to tie one hand behind their back and are encouraging circumstances where it's able to be a fairly pitched fight between us and not punitive.

 

Concluding a war with a set amount of rounds is not an uncommon phenomenon in CN history and not exclusive to CLAWS.

Oh this is too good. I'm starting to see why outside people call you chickensphere. Personally, I'd love for you and LH personally duke it out, see who can out damage one another for bragging rights. That would be more entertaining than whatever this is

Edited by Liltrekkie
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Just now, Lord Hitchcock said:

What was the point of me joining that peace thread circus if it was going to be addressed as an open letter?

 

I mean, right back at you?

 

*points to your surrender thread*

 

What was the point of me joining your first server if you were going to just post a surrender regardless?

 

---

 

 

Anyway, at this point? Irrelevant. You have our proposal, take your time to decide if you need it.

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7 minutes ago, Liltrekkie said:

Well if this isnt the most unoriginal post I've ever read. Minus the decom of the SDI, you basically took what CLAWS gave to Lucious and applied them to KNB. Bravo on that originality. Eat any creativity lately?

Not really. For one, as you mentioned the SDI. Two, claws demanded Lucius buy up to 4k to get hit by more of their stronger tiered members. Three, the timing CLAWS choice was meant to represent the three rounds Shtanto sat out in peace mode, because for some reason that really, really bothered them. Four, while never mentioned, it was assumed we weren't allowed to aid Lucius during this time. I'm willing to bet if I asked @jazzyor another CLAWS government member they'd say that was implied. Five, we're offering equal numbers of people to fight, not some sort of dog pile.

All in all, our terms are far less punitive and are objectively more lenient, considering active harm done without provocation by KNB members to our allies in Ordo Cyberneticus. But, you seem like the type to complain that the five dollar bill you found on the sidewalk wasn't a fifty.

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3 minutes ago, Lord Hitchcock said:

What was the point of me joining that peace thread circus if it was going to be addressed as an open letter?

What was the point of you posting a surrender thread without seeing if we'd accepted your surrender?

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3 minutes ago, Liltrekkie said:

Oh this is too good. I'm starting to see why outside people call you chickensphere. Personally, I'd love for you and LH personally duke it out, see who can out damage one another for bragging rights. That would be more entertaining than whatever this is

You're pretty confident 

 

Why haven't you entered the war yet? 

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4 minutes ago, Liltrekkie said:

Oh this is too good. I'm starting to see why outside people call you chickensphere. Personally, I'd love for you and LH personally duke it out, see who can out damage one another for bragging rights. That would be more entertaining than whatever this is

So...offering a fair and equal fight without limit to aiding the combatants is cowardly? I wonder what that says about other recent peace agreements.

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Just now, Lord Hitchcock said:

Okay,

 

For round one I would like Kapleo to buy 25k more to get into the top 250 and fight Banned.

You're really pretty bad at understanding this whole "I surrender" concept aren't you?

You don't really get to make demands. Banned is more than welcome to sell down if he wants that fight.

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Just now, Lucius Optimus said:

You're pretty confident 

 

Why haven't you entered the war yet? 

The word optional seems to come to mind. Ah yes, Optional defense pact, that's what its called. My only interest here is making sure KNB gets a fair shake, that's it. Nothing more, nothing less. And judging from Tanks post above mine, it sounds like you're going to choose which KNB members get to fight. And that's not a fair shake.

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1 minute ago, Liltrekkie said:

The word optional seems to come to mind. Ah yes, Optional defense pact, that's what its called. My only interest here is making sure KNB gets a fair shake, that's it. Nothing more, nothing less. And judging from Tanks post above mine, it sounds like you're going to choose which KNB members get to fight. And that's not a fair shake.

Not sure how you got that from my post at all. That may be how CLAWS does things, but not how we do it.

Funny, considering how much crap LH and you gave Johnny and Kap for not coming to our defense in our ODP, that excuse seems a little flimsy.

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1 minute ago, Liltrekkie said:

The word optional seems to come to mind. Ah yes, Optional defense pact, that's what its called. My only interest here is making sure KNB gets a fair shake, that's it. Nothing more, nothing less. And judging from Tanks post above mine, it sounds like you're going to choose which KNB members get to fight. And that's not a fair shake.

 

Nope, again the proposal is pretty clear.  External parties may be recruited if they see fit, they are free to receive aid. I don't think you get fairer than that when it comes to a closing duel.

 

C'mon dude, I'm trying to make this at least a bit fun and even-handed for everyone. Don't be such a buzzkill.

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1 minute ago, Tankobite said:

Funny, considering how much crap LH and you gave Johnny and Kap for not coming to our defense in our ODP, that excuse seems a little flimsy.

That's what makes this fun, they call it !@#$ posting for a reason. So far, JA is the best at it. Nothing personal, but he has more snark to his comments

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1 minute ago, Liltrekkie said:

That's what makes this fun, they call it !@#$ posting for a reason. So far, JA is the best at it. Nothing personal, but he has more snark to his comments

Ah, the old 'i was pretending to be retarded' defense. Congratulations. You win at !@#$%* posts.

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1 minute ago, Lord Hitchcock said:

This letter seems more of a distraction from that train wreck of your reputation from last night.

You are objectively the worst person at surrendering I've ever seen.
 

Quote
sur·ren·der
/səˈrendər/
 
verb
  1. cease resistance to an enemy or opponent and submit to their authority.
    "over 140 rebels surrendered to the authorities"

Take a break from posting on OWF till White Chocolate reads the post and then let the adults do the talking.

Edited by Tankobite
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Just now, Tankobite said:

Ah, the old 'i was pretending to be retarded' defense. Congratulations. You win at !@#$%* posts.

Man, and JA calls me the buzzkill. I'm hearing a lot of buzzing coming from your direction. Either you have a bee infestation or youre being a buzzkill. You should get it checked out either way.

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Just now, Liltrekkie said:

Man, and JA calls me the buzzkill. I'm hearing a lot of buzzing coming from your direction. Either you have a bee infestation or youre being a buzzkill. You should get it checked out either way.

"No u"

I give this reply a 2 out of score.

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2 minutes ago, Tankobite said:

You are objectively the worst person at surrendering I've ever seen.


It was a complete groveling dumpster fire of which every attempting at patching the boat produced more holes in the lining.

 

And now this, a ‘fair war’ after a 7-1 war declaration.

 

We surrender and would’ve left the hatchet buried had Johnny and Kapleo not taken it to the next level and try shaming me through the streets.

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19 minutes ago, Liltrekkie said:

Oh this is too good. I'm starting to see why outside people call you chickensphere. Personally, I'd love for you and LH personally duke it out, see who can out damage one another for bragging rights. That would be more entertaining than whatever this is

Lord Hitchcock has never been able to personally duke anything out. His nation isn't even ankle biter. It exists so he can post here. He barely has casualties. He couldn't fight Johnny with 5 years of prep. 

 

LH is just a mouth.

 

Are you this delightfully obtuse on purpose?

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Just now, Lord Hitchcock said:


It was a complete groveling dumpster fire of which every attempting at patching the boat produced more holes in the lining.

 

And now this, a ‘fair war’ after a 7-1 war declaration.

 

We surrender and would’ve left the hatchet buried had Johnny and Kapleo not taken it to the next level and try shaming me through the streets.

Oh, you poor dear. You had to fight several micros after you attacked one of their allies. Also, we're up to 7 now? Last time you were crying about how it was 5-1. Did you suddenly learn to do basic math?

Again, you seem to misunderstand how a surrender works. A surrender isn't "I'm tired of the war, so I say it's over."  Let me reiterate what surrender means by definition,
 

sur·ren·der
/səˈrendər/
 
verb
  1. cease resistance to an enemy or opponent and submit to their authority.

    You don't get to just tell us you surrender. We have to accept it.
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