Kaboom sat on his porch swing, gently rocking back and forth in the breeze. It was a truly beautiful day; in fact, one might even go so far as to describe it as perfect. The sun was on his face, he had recently received a promotion at work, and just this morning, the lovely Maria down the lane had smiled at him. Life was good.
This, of course, bothered Kaboom. For what good is a life in which there is no room for complaint? It had been three days since he’d last complained, when his neighbour Doug had been wearing a hat that was slightly too green for Kaboom’s liking, and he was growing itchy.
He felt a strange tickling sensation on his foot, and looked down. Crawling over his skin was a small eight-legged creature. He lifted it up with his finger, and examined it. A crab! How unexpected. But this recognition had barely entered his mind when, with a scream, a rocket flew into that damn Doug’s house, sending timbers and tiles exploding in all directions, a shower of debris raining down on the cul-de-sac. Kaboom could have sworn that the side of the rocket was emblazoned with a large version of the very creature that had just scuttled over his foot.
He looked in alarm towards the end of the street, where soldiers in yellow and black were swarming in. Nick. How dare he bring his garbage soldiers to Kaboom’s home? Who did they think they were? Nobody could ever hope to best Kaboom’s own defences.
And then a jet roared overhead, its wings decorated with a white dragon’s head on black. The Dark Order. Now this was just the cherry on the unfair cake that this invasion clearly was. There were no worse people in all the worlds than the damn Dark Order. Useless in every way.
But, thought Kaboom, there is a bright side.
As he reached for his assault rifle, and lifted it into the air, he felt the cloud lift from his mind. Finally, here was something for him to complain about.
The Dark Order, New Desolate Order and Krabz declare war upon Citadel, the Phoenix Cobras, Ordo Paradoxia and the Misfits.
Watch out, Kaboom. Lacuna is coming for you.