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The League of Nations


Captain Enema

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He'd quickly find out the stewardess wasn't Maltese and that she also had a bad case of the crabs. The Mall fight wasn't much to comment on either as he ran into the food court and pushed the 83 year old guard over and broke the old man's hip. From there he was chased out of the mall by a crowd of irate children and he promptly surrendered himself to the safety of the League guards who took pity on him. After giving him a chance to change his crap filled trousers he would be escorted back into the League meeting and shown to his chair.

 

"Sir, welcome back, take a seat," the King said as he ordered his assistant to place the White Cross Treaty, the League of Nations Treaty, and the Scales and Red Cross Convent of Valletta in front of him along with the transcript of what has been said so far.

 

The General would quickly scan through the documents with superhuman speed. "Normally I say this League of Nations sounds like hive of capitalist scum, but in interest of solidarity Russia is willing to join as observer. And why the name White Cross? It sounds anti-Soviet."

Edited by JEDCJT
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"Why not name it the 'Red Star' or something? Every time we think of 'White Cross', we involuntarily shudder in existential dread that quickly becomes despair, and that forces us to consume higher quantities of Death Vodka and which makes it very difficult for us to continued our work dedicated to the improvement of the People's lives."

Edited by JEDCJT
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"Don't over think it, just sign the paper, if someone steals your deathvodka, the White Cross will help. Though, the national chapters of the White Cross are certainly fair game to rename. I'm thinking of renaming Malta's White Cross the Valleta Gun and Rod Club."

Edited by Tidy Bowl Man
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Given no one seems to be responding, the King signs the document that he previously just removed his signature from. 

 

"I will be opening a meeting in a different venue for all those who have signed the League charter, for those who have not or will not, we wish you the best of luck and ask you reconsider at a later date," the King said as he stood and left the room. The cleaning staff would then immediately begin removing drinks, food, and packing up any equipment that was placed in the room for the meeting.

 

In another conference room, five doors down, with two guards wearing White Cross International Uniforms, the League of Nations chambers awaited. The King made his way to those chambers and ordered a cup of coffee and started plowing his way through a mountain of emails on his highly encrypted tablet computer. 

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"I wish to make a formal statement, the Kingdom of Malta has established a Safe Haven for civilians near the city of Batukanneh. The projected force necessary for clearing the city of criminal elements and warlords proved to prohibitive at this time. The Safe Haven will be supported by Malta for a minimum of five years. Local security will be taken care of for now by a Maltese Reservist Battalion but within six months a native Militia Battalion will take over. We request at this time some sort of official League of Nations approval for this as the Hope Float operation that facilitated this effort came about as part of Malta's ongoing commitment to the League of Nations. Of course, the BSH is open to observers but we request notice in advance of their arrival, space in the BSH is limited."

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Dražen Zoric Cižek blinked as he had followed the Maltan King into the chamber that had been designated for the League of Nations as a whole, "I see no reason why the Kingdom would refuse to approve of such an effort when it's entirely humanitarian in nature, your majesty. I'm curious if this Batukanneh Safe Haven would be able to host soldiers from member nations down the road in good time, any expenses being paid for by the member volunteering the forces of course," he chimed in, giving the Kingdom's approval of the Maltan humanitarian effort.

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"I think that in good time the BSH will be devoid of even Maltese soldiers with security handled by a local militia battalion. The BSH isn't intended to act as a foothold for foreign expansion into the region, merely provide a safe haven for a municipality and surrounding region sadly afflicted by criminals and chaos."

 

 

ooc- the militia battalion will come out of my own troop count and be used for local defense only.

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The Greek representative, flanked by representatives of the Hellenic military, stepped quickly into the chamber. She cast a quick glance at the Yugoslavian representative, then to Malta's King, before speaking to any who remained in the room, “Greece brings forward an issue for the League: The Yugoslavian invasion of Bulgaria. Several weeks ago the Slavs crossed their borders with an invasion force consisting of roughly two army corps, and have begun entrenching themselves in Bulgaria's territory. Greece cannot allow such an invasion to stand, but we are a peace loving people, and bring the matter before the League for diplomatic resolution.”

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Dražen Cižek blinked at the accusations that the Kingdom's ally threw into its face, the Councilor perplexed and befuddled at the serious accusations before he delved into his role once more, doing his best to control the situation. "Firstly, the Kingdom did not invade Bulgaria in any shape or fashion, otherwise the soldiers currently within the territory would be fighting rebels when the only thing they are currently doing is keeping the peace and ensure that banditry does not rise in the region in the face of no national government," he elaborated before continuing, "Secondly, the Kingdom did not send an invasion force, it only sent a force large enough to protect the region and said force is not the size of two army corps but merely three divisions. That is one fifths the size of an army group for those not knowledgeable in military organizational sizes," he explained once more before quirking an eyebrow, "Thirdly, the Kingdom is a peaceful nation and as such we do not seek war with our southern neighbor in the Hellenic Republic so these wild accusations are alarming when it is coming from one we see as a friend."

Edited by Rudolph
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Dražen nodded, "That would be correct. The Kingdom's intentions are to simply protect the Bulgarian people and its territory from banditry or foreign interlopers who might seek to annex it into their country, same way for the region of Albania as we are currently protecting," he answered before adjusting his tie, "Should they wish to be annexed by the Kingdom, the decision on doing so rests solely on the Bulgarian people if they wish to pursue such a course of action for the Kingdom shall not encourage, attempt or move to annex the region by its own inclination, we seek only to protect what we see as Brothers and Sisters."

Edited by Rudolph
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"That's a reasonable desire, though I have to wonder why you need 3 divisions worth of troops in a place that puts them right on the border of Greece? Can you not see their concerns? Good fences make for good neighbors. Perhaps you ought to consider a joint protectorate with Greece, which allows them to alleviate some of their concerns about their border security."

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Dražen nodded, "The region of Bulgaria is easily half the size of the Kingdom with mountainous regions that necessitates the number of men to ensure that banditry does not take up in the territory," he answered before lightly shaking his head, "The Kingdom did not act without informing the Hellenic Republic, we sent them a missive informing them of the move in both regions of Albania and Bulgaria without a response till the Hellenic Republic had moved troops into the region and requested the Kingdom to remove all forces, something that we in good conscience cannot do. We offered to host Hellenic forces to aid in protecting the region as a possible compromise but we have received no further response from the Republic till the accusations being laid down in this very chamber, your majesty," he added before glancing at the Greek representative for a second, "It is why it alarms the Kingdom of such serious accusations."

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The King nods and waits for a response from the Greek representative. As he waits he calls up a report on Bulgaria and reads it.

 

http://i.puthtml.com/content_forever/phpq8wgup

 

After reading the report, on his tablet, the king sends an instant message to his assistant to inform him that he's fired. 

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