Phil Collins1

The lack of Auctor is disturbing.

I blame Mayzie.

Happy birthday you old codgers. Zimmer is in the post!

Lovely stuff as always Mr Evil. Some nice rise up the rankings from the Lodge these past few days. Hopefully we can keep it up.

Where is Raasaa? Have you still got him locked up in the NV dungeon? Free the Raasaa 1! Congratulations/commiserations to all those appointed.

AlexG my lord, AlexG AlexG my lord, AlexG AlexG my lord, AlexG Oh lord, AlexG

Flicking through the channels on Sussudian television last night I happened to pick up some San Serriffe broadcast. Keep an eye out for El Presidente himself!

Old-school B)

No finer group around than the 57th. If you're on the look-out for a new alliance then what are you waiting for eh?

1 Touch Give us a wave! 1 Touch 1 Touch Give us a wave!

That's because you're our puppet. Best of luck to UCN's new and not quite so new mates.

You young'uns are just too quick for the likes of me.

Well done mates

Did you know .... Mayzie's football chants are scientifically proven to be 98.35% less effective than AlexG314's factual posts.

True enough. I'll just have to console myself by counting my millions and writing another single. Any suggestions for a theme?

It worked on me, I've wet myself.

GM's Monthly Report July 2009 A message from the Office of Grand Master of The Grand Lodge of Freemasons. Hello there one and all, A somewhat quiet month by our high standards as the Lodge went into a bit of a post-war lull. Here follows a heavily edited version of of my Grand Masters Report. Internal Works July saw the return of not one but two former Lodge legends in the shape of former Grand Superintendent and all round nice guy AlexG314 and former Grand Chancellor ModusOperandi. Alex returns after a short spell with his own alliance and the Jedi Order while Modus had a spell with his own alliance and FIRE. On behalf of the Lodge, I'd like to welcome them both back home. Hopefully that's the last time I have to say that. A slight government re-shuffle took place with Alaric taking over from the extremely busy Quatz as Grand Sword Bearer. RangerRick comes in as Recruitment Marshal. July was a month of anniversaries with several distinguished members celebrating high points. Tak178's Aatraad and Underbg's Salya celebrated 1st birthdays. Great to see two wonderful Lodge members flourishing under our esteemed banner. Kuhnini and Obscurus both had 6 month milestones in our wonderful ole alliance. I'd like to thank all of them for their loyal and unwavering dedication to the cause. Lord Xnut undertook another internal poll to establish our average age. Conclusive proof was gathered that showed we're all far too old. Let's leave it at that! Applicants taking the oath this month were: Bro #362 - RangerRick160 of JSOC Republic Bro #363 - choasreclaimed of Choas Reclimation Bro #364 - Nerfertiti of De Beauvoir Bro #365 - Sack-o-potato of The Dump Bro #366 - Iskander the Great of Makedovia Bro #367 - Southern Empire of Southern kingdom Bro #368 - Marcus Lucianus of Valerian Bro #369 - Akwey of randomnation Bro #370 - sanjaybenjamin of Kenyan Congratulations to our nine new members this month Masons showing their obligation and receiving the Entered Apprentice apron were: RangerRick, massoud, choasreclaimed, Marcus Lucianus, Iskander the Great and Akwey. Masons so taken and accepted among Fellows were: sapulpa66, RangerRick, choasreclaimed, Marcus Lucianus, Iskander the Great and Akwey. Masons raised to the sublime degree of Master Mason were: john 268, RangerRick,Ionis, Iskander the Great and Marcus Lucianus It's very pleasing to see many more Fellow Crafts and Master Masons than at this point last month. Foreign Affairs A busy month on the ole treaty front. The main bit of news was the passing and signing of our Mutual Defence and Optional Aggression Pact with the 57th Overlanders. I'm hopeful this one will be a lasting friendship. FnKa were accepted into OUT after a yes vote by our membership give their approval. We wish them all the best. AlexG314 replaced Penedono as a Citrus Councillor. It's hoped Alex will act as a sort of trade liaison between our trade circles and the ones on the OUT forum, helping them all get filled that much quicker. I wish Alex all the best in his new orangey themed role. We agreed to release MCXA from surrender terms without any fuss. They completed their obligations without hindrance and it was a pleasure it affix our signature on their freedom. Treasury Bluesasquatch continues to do fine work as Grand Treasurer alongside his able Deacons. Our current aid results reads 245, which is up from 202 at this time last month so a hefty improvement. July was a charitable month for the Lodge as Monkeybum and then later AlexG314 sparked a aid giving spree. Some Monkey magic meant that in 2 days, 18 nations received 3 million, totalling 54 million in aid. Shortly after the , Super Alex followed suit with another aid drive which raised a total of $21m in aid. Hopefully this can become a regular feature of our monthly goings on. All these various aid pushes coupled with some impressed tech trading has meant we now have very few smaller nations that can deal with rogues. July saw the very first instance of the Lodge having to appeal to it's allies (UCN in this case) for help in dealing with a rogue due to a lack of small nations. Knights Templar Tak178 became Knight of the 4th Squad as a result of Alaric moving to Grand Sword Bearer. During his 1st birthday month this was a well deserved promotion for one of the Lodges' great un-sung heroes. He will be ablely assisted by Alexg314 in his new role as Sgt. With BigHoppa sadly no longer with us, Bower has been chosen by Walking Dead to replace him. It's good to see Bower returning to a more active role about the place after his successful stint as Grand Chancellor not so long ago. Awards A few well deserved medals to hand out, mostly for continued hard work and achievement. For achieving 3 months Masonic service: chessplayer of Brightcastle NerfHerder of Exquisite DEVINWALLACE of DEWIN For achieving 6 months Masonic service: macca56 of Great gambier ultimaniac of The Dark Templars Emperor Sather of Nova Babylonia Emily Tandoori of Slewn Isle Kuhnini of Santo and Banks Lord arc55 of zirahn SheriffBart of RockRidge For achieving 12 months Masonic service: Nauris of Dancingem Angryginn of Orange Tree Nosferatu of Goodjeria Walking_Dead of Camp Couch Mehvek of Mahvekastan SikDeebo of Lorastorso originalcloudtown of originalcloudtown Ptolemy the Great of Macedonia Malone of Etowah Underbg of Salya wardog360 of United Cuba The Machine of The Machine2 Moosewizard of Turmoosekistan Tak178 of Aatraad Deaconship Attainment Badge (Internal Works) - A Freemason is eligible to receive this recognition who has served the Grand Lodge as an assistant to a Government Officer and has been deemed to have discharged their duties with Fidelity and Honour. MooseWizard Looking out for inactives, deletions and ghosts is a somewhat thankless task but extremely vital for maintaining some order. It's my pleasure to award the Internal Works version of the Deaconship Attainment Badge to MooseWizard. One of our most respected and admired members. Deaconship Attainment Badge (Foreign Affairs) - A Freemason is eligible to receive this recognition who has served the Grand Lodge as an assistant to a Government Officer and has been deemed to have discharged their duties with Fidelity and Honour. Augustus Keeping Penedono on his toes is trivia king, Augustus. Getting himself fully involved in all manner of Foreign Affairs related shenanigans. I'm delighted to award Augustus with this Badge of Attainment. Well done Augy! Honour Award - A member is eligible to receive this award who while serving in any capacity within a Foreign Alliance has distinguished himself or herself by assisting The Grand Lodge above and beyond the call of duty. The performance must be such as to merit recognition for service that is clearly awesome. DVDCCHN Mayzie Mechanus Three separate winners of this award which has only been given out twice before. DVDCCHN is in all likelihood the main reason for OUT's recent revival. His amazing work and all round superman skills in visiting orange alliances hasn't gone unnoticed in the Lodge. To not beat around the bush, we like the cut of his jib. What a guy! I truly hope IRON realise what an asset they have in DVD. "Good old Mayzie" is often heard around Lodge circles. A genuine nice guy and all-round super-star. Always willing to help when you ask and is one of the main reasons for keeping AZTEC functioning well. Just the other day he took 20 minutes out of his busy schedule to help a Lodge applicant through our application process. It's that sort of conduct that means I'm delighted to award him the Lodge Honour Award. Mechanus has been a part of Lodge history for longer than I can remember. A former stalwart of a previous Lodge treaty partner, he never remained out of touch and kept up relations fully even though we never had a treaty. One of the finest diplomats in Planet Bob, it's long overdue that I present Mech with the Lodge Honour award. State of the Masons So with July brought to a close ... well almost, we can see how we've done in the great scheme of things among our peers: Total Nations - 109 (Up from 107 in June) Percent Active - 50% (Down from 57% in June) Strength - 2,215,809 (Up from 2,137,214 in June) Average Strength - 20,329 (Up from 19,974 in June) Score - 8.70 - (Up from 8.43 in June) Aid Results - 245 (Up from 202 in June) Alliance Ranking - 52nd (Unchanged) Pretty good I'd say. The big improvement was the aid results thanks to some extremely generous Brothers and Sisters. This concludes my July report as Grand Master of the Lodge. Phil Collins Grand Master

Best of luck to you MCXA.

Join UCN but watch out for DarkFox

Join Bushido, you know it makes sense.

Well done FnKa! Been fantastic getting to know you guys recently and I'm sure you will be fine addition to the OUT ranks. Orange B)

I'll treasure this bar of soap, always. 1TF seem to be making some good signings these days, on Bosman free transfers to boot.

Good luck Cyphon in the Grand Master role.