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This Week on Faux: Lannister Unhinged - Ramblings of an Egotist

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This Week on Faux News

Monday January 27th, 2014

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Lannister Unhinged?

rhVdIsV.jpg

Image Courtesy DeviantArt

Author of the CN Blog Series Accuses Community of "pathetic attempts to silence free speech"

The Lannister News Network this morning issued a new report claiming that recent blog posts were made by members of the CN Community in an attempt to lower the visibility of LNN's programming. The author and founder of the Lannister News Network, Tywin Lannister, accused several members of the community of participating in a campaign against "free thought and intellectual speech" using what he defines as "blog spam" to remove his latest blog, Talking Points Memo: Farrin's PR offensive, from the list of most recent blog posts. We caught up with Mr. Lannister in #polaris on the Coldfront IRC network and sought out the basis of these radical accusations. Mr. Lannister was combative throughout the interview, and refused to answer several questions. He provided no evidence to support his claim that these recent blogs were anything other than a coincidence. Instead, Mr. Lannister provided this comment:

<Scourge> So what about these accusations you've recently made. What basis is there for them?

<Tywin_Lannister> hey I didnt start this

<Tywin_Lannister> people want to post a bunch of blog posts within 24 hours I already planned for a way around this

<Tywin_Lannister> In fact I predicted it

<Scourge> So the only evidence you have that there are people attempting to reduce viewership of LNN is the spike in blog posts?

<Tywin_Lannister> I provide analysis

<Tywin_Lannister> my analysis is that this was not coincidental

<Tywin_Lannister> can I absolutely prove it was not a coincidence? no

<Scourge> This is an important issue though, is it not? You're saying that people are deliberately trying to keep readers away from your blog, don't those accusations deserve an investigation?

<Tywin_Lannister> no, it doesnt deserve an investigation, it deserves a plan B

<Tywin_Lannister> which I already had

<Tywin_Lannister> I already predicted people would spam blog posts

<Scourge> I get it, I get it. You had a plan in place in case this happened. But what I'm trying to figure out is how you are making the claim that LNN is the target of a campaign. You're saying that all these posts where done specifically to push you out? Or just a coincidence?

<Tywin_Lannister> its quite the coincidence

<Tywin_Lannister> for months a post would be up for up to a week

<Tywin_Lannister> and in 24 hours you have a dozen new blog posts

<Tywin_Lannister> AFTER Farrin posts that thread

<Tywin_Lannister> people are smart enough to put the puzzle together for themself

<Scourge> So which ones are blatant spam attempts?

<Tywin_Lannister> So is that the strategy?

<Tywin_Lannister> trying to get me to say something egocentric sounding lol

<Scourge> I already told you Tywin, I just want to know the truth here.

<Tywin_Lannister> Well scourge considering I cannot read these peoples minds, no, I cant tell you why they did it for sure

<Scourge> I didn't ask you why they did it, I asked you to show me which blogs you are considering part of this campaign against LNN.

<Tywin_Lannister> I'm not going to descend into debating lulz tactics

<Tywin_Lannister> thats something Im above

<Scourge> So you won't answer the question?

<Tywin_Lannister> nope

Now, while I have my doubts as to Mr. Lannister's ability to predict the future, I'll save those for another day. When pushed as to why these recent posts were defined, in his views, as a campaign against the Lannister News Network, Mr. Lannister appeared to contradict the LNN report, instead stating:

<Tywin_Lannister> its not a plot

<Tywin_Lannister> just dumb*** lulz

We apologize to our younger viewers that we were forced to censor Mr. Lannister's comments. Faux News is committed to family friendly programming, and that language is not tolerated on our network.

We asked Mr. Lannister about the importance of having the LNN appear in the most recent blog posts, and we also asked him about alternative viewing methods. In response, Mr. Lannister accused the other blog posts of lacking in relevance:

<Tywin_Lannister> I use the blog so people can say whatever they want in the comments without the OWF rules

<Tywin_Lannister> if yall want to take that option off my table I can just poste straight to the OWF

<Tywin_Lannister> I used the blog because people whined so much about me using the OWF

<Tywin_Lannister> everyone knows people use the 5 newest blog posts to the right

<Scourge> Why don't you just repost it if that visibility is so important?

<Tywin_Lannister> because I believe in organized discourse

<Scourge> So, you can post, but if more than 5 others post then it's a campaign against LNN?

<Tywin_Lannister> no

<Tywin_Lannister> posting a blog with "keeping it 100" is not adding to the community

<Tywin_Lannister> I welcome people to post relevantly

<Tywin_Lannister> this the same sht MK used to pull js

<Scourge> What do you have against more community content?

<Tywin_Lannister> Im against community garbage

<Scourge> Who are you to judge the quality of a blog?

<Scourge> Isn't that something that is open to the community to decide?

<Tywin_Lannister> cant troll a troll scourge

<Tywin_Lannister> Do you champion the lulz scourge?

<Scourge> I'm not taking either side here, I'm just trying to understand what your basis is for your accusations.

<Tywin_Lannister> yall trying to spam !@#$ is trying to keep my words from reaching the people

<Tywin_Lannister> I go toe to toe with anyone in CN gloves or no gloves

<Tywin_Lannister> the fact that Im also intellectual is something you hate on massively

We again apologize for Mr. Lannister's vulgarity in this interview.

Now, Faux News investigated Mr. Lannister's claims that recent blogs were "garbage" and "lulz", and determined that only one was even close to fitting that criteria. We caught up with the author of that blog, BringMeTheHorizon, and asked him about Mr. Lannister's radical accusations:

<Scourge> BringMeTheHorizon: Tywin Lannister has accused you of being part of a plot against "free thought and intellectual speech" in an attempt to lower the visibility of his blog. Any response to those accusations?

<BringMeTheHorizon> Well to be fair, i'm just keepin it 100, wanted to let everyone know

<BringMeTheHorizon> The other ones seem to actually have content

Now, I read Mr. Lannister's program frequently, and while I don't always agree with the content I respect his right to say it. We here at Faux News hold freedom of speech in the highest regard, and that is why we decided to investigate this issue. However, our investigation can reach no other conclusion that Mr. Lannister is simply attempting to stir up among his readers a sensation of mistrust and outright hatred towards those who LNN opposes politically. There is no evidence to support any sort of conspiracy against Mr. Lannister personally, LNN, or any of LNN's individual programs. We suspect that the influx of alternate community content simply made Mr. Lannister nervous, with the possibility that viewership to his blog would drop without the free exposure being listed in the most recent blog posts provides.

You decide! Vote in the poll and let's hear your thoughts on this issue in the comments below. Were the recent blog posts created to reduce viewership of LNN?

We leave you now with our final thought:

<Scourge> I just want the truth.

<Tywin_Lannister> then read my blog ;)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Faux News is an Independent Production

Faux News, because pixels.

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Scourge

Hey! Let's make a blog post critiquing the all the recent blog postings!

It's more meta than that. I made a blog post critiquing a blog post critiquing all the recent blog postings. Can Lannister News Network take us one level deeper?

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Bob Ilyani

It's more meta than that. I made a blog post critiquing a blog post critiquing all the recent blog postings. Can Lannister News Network take us one level deeper?

I don't know, but I think I should blog about the possibilities.

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The Zigur

Im going to note that this was not a formal interview nor did I consent to logs being used for journalistic purposes. Had Scourge informed me of his intentions I might have provided serious answers in an IC context.

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YOLO SWAG

Im going to note that this was not a formal interview nor did I consent to logs being used for journalistic purposes. Had Scourge informed me of his intentions I might have provided serious answers in an IC context.

Would you be willing to give a formal interview for channel yolon blog?

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HM Solomon I

<Scourge> This is an important issue though, is it not? You're saying that people are deliberately trying to keep readers away from your blog, don't those accusations deserve an investigation?
<Tywin_Lannister> no, it doesnt deserve an investigation, it deserves a plan B

Present and accounted for! :D

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The Zigur

excuse me yolo swag? dont talk to me like that. When I am talking to someone, i am talking to them. When I say shut the $%&@ up, im talking to you. Show some respect, bud.

Just shows how these people are bro. They will tear down anyone who champions the truth.
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Neo Uruk

excuse me yolo swag? dont talk to me like that. When I am talking to someone, i am talking to them. When I say shut the $%&@ up, im talking to you. Show some respect, bud.

try harder, please. I want to see how cool you think you can be.
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YOLO SWAG

excuse me yolo swag? dont talk to me like that. When I am talking to someone, i am talking to them. When I say shut the $%&@ up, im talking to you. Show some respect, bud.

To quote a friend: what's in it for me?

Just shows how these people are bro. They will tear down anyone who champions the truth.

ATG is a champion of the truth now?

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Saladjoe

If your blog is as seethingly sarcastic as you generally are, I'd even advertise it for you. :|

I'll take a blog based on sarcastic wit over a blog based on sheer ignorance any day of the week. And twice on Thursdays.

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WarriorSoul

I'll take a blog based on sarcastic wit over a blog based on sheer ignorance any day of the week. And twice on Thursdays.

I would too, but my Thursdays are so damn busy and could only accommodate one blog. :(

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Bob Ilyani

excuse me yolo swag? dont talk to me like that. When I am talking to someone, i am talking to them. When I say shut the $%&@ up, im talking to you. Show some respect, bud.

What the &#036;%&amp;@ did you just &#33;@#&#036;@#&#036; say about me, you little &#33;@#&#036;%*? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the &#036;%&amp;@ out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my &#33;@#&#036;@#&#036; words. You think you can get away with saying that &#33;@#&#036; to me over the Internet? Think again, &#33;@#&#036;%. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re &#33;@#&#036;@#&#036; dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little &#33;@#&#036;. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your &#33;@#&#036;@#&#036; tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will &#33;@#&#036; fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re &#33;@#&#036;@#&#036; dead, kiddo.

Oh my god, you're a moron. Come back to posting again when you graduate high school.

I would too, but my Thursdays are so damn busy and could only accommodate one blog. :(

Clearly my services are in demand...

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Alex The Great

wow, tough words from a tough guy, eh? Oh, i think your thinking of you Battlefield 4 game that is true. Yawn, you couldnt figure one way to slap someone. Obviously you are a joke. Also, Tywin, haters going to hate

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The Zigur

What the $%&@ did you just !@#$@#$ say about me, you little !@#$%*? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the $%&@ out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my !@#$@#$ words. You think you can get away with saying that !@#$ to me over the Internet? Think again, !@#$%. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re !@#$@#$ dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little !@#$. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your !@#$@#$ tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will !@#$ fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re !@#$@#$ dead, kiddo.

Oh my god, you're a moron. Come back to posting again when you graduate high school.

Clearly my services are in demand...

What the $%&@ did you just !@#$@#$ say about my gear, you little n00b? I’ll have you know I am a lvl 90 Undead Arcane Mage, and I’ve won so many PVP matches, and I have done raids on every 10 man heroic dungeon. I also have a $%&@ton of macros and I have a GS of 10K. You are nothing to me but just a lvl 12 gnome hunter. I will pwn the $%&@ out of you with Arcane Missiles the likes of which has never been seen before on Azeroth AND Outland, mark my !@#$@#$ words. You think you can get away with saying that !@#$ to me over raid? Think again, !@#$%. As we speak I am contacting my guild of mages and shamans across The Eastern Kingdoms and your character is being targeted right now so you better prepare for the ownage, n00b. The Arcane Barrage that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your character. You’re !@#$@#$ pwn’d, n00b. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my secondary talent tree. Not only am I extensively trained in Arcane magic, but I have access to the entire arsenal of Fire magic and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable neckbeard off the face of Azeroth, you little !@#$%^. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your !@#$@#$ tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re getting debuffed, you goddamnn00b. I will !@#$ Dragon’s Breath all over you and you will burn in it. You’re !@#$@#$ pwn’d, !@#$%^.

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Ernesto Che Guevara

wow, tough words from a tough guy, eh? Oh, i think your thinking of you Battlefield 4 game that is true. Yawn, you couldnt figure one way to slap someone. Obviously you are a joke. Also, Tywin, haters going to hate

In the world of CN, it takes a lot to be crowned the biggest moron of the bunch. You've clearly done everything it takes to earn said crown and secure it from any possible contenders.

http://knowyourmeme.com/memes/navy-seal-copypasta

Why can't you just masturbate like everybody else?

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