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Nutty North Korean Anniversary

Pikachujc

By Pikachujc
in Alliance Announcements (IC)

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[center][img]http://i168.photobucket.com/albums/u190/TiagoJeronimo/NorthNuttyKoreaBanner.png[/img][/center]

Ho ho ho, Cybernation. It me, Park Hwang-bo, here to tell story of North Korea Christmas. To aid in spread of yarn, I capitulate to Nigel Burnsley to translate for greater clarity of tale.

As many of you know, at Christmas time, North Korea is the jolliest dictatorship around. In fact, Kim Jong-il decreed that Christmas cheer was mandatory for all citizens, and failure to spread Christmas wishes would result in severe marshall punishment. On Christmas Eve, the streets of P'yongyang were filled with happy shoppers, purchasing a wide selection of items, such as surplus military shovels, burlap sacks and DVDs of "The Sarah Silverman Programme". By the end of the day, the stores were wiped clean, all except "The Sarah Silverman Programme". On Christmas morning, the shrieks of children filled the air, as they tore the wrapping from their surplus military shovels, as parents looked on with satisfaction.

The happiest of all, of course, was Kim Jong-il. All the citizens of North Korea were so pleased with Kim Jong-il's visionary leadership, that they sent him many gifts. North Korea soldiers casually entered the homes of North Korean citizens, and rummaged through their belongings for valuables to give to Kim Jong-il, as the homeowners looked on with satisfaction. Though the United Nations and Amnesty International alleged that the scene involved more coercion and less satisfaction, the humble folks at the North Korean Propaganda Ministry assure you that everyone involved did it with a smile on their face.

Though this scene looks full of Christmas cheer, there were some dissenting individuals who claimed that Santa Claus was a myth. As many of you know, Santa Claus is a central North Korean figure, who delivers military equipment to revolutionary children throughout the country. But this foolish movement gathered popularity, and soon Kim Jong-il had to deploy forces to quell this movement. The following documentary was produced by Park Hwang-bo, factually depicting the battle as it occurred:

[size="5"][url="http://www.overstream.net/swf/player/oplx?oid=s4nusklqlfus&noplay=1"]Kim Jong-il's Christmas Tale[/url][/size]

Well, it's been a full year. NNK was founded without much thought or planning, just a few people who wanted to have a bit of fun. And though we've gained a few more members, and had our ups and downs, that's still all NNK is. And we wouldn't change it for the world.

Oh, and remember,

[center][img]http://thesomewhatambitious.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/09/north-korea-is-best-korea.jpg[/img][/center]

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