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Nutty North Korean Announcement


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An Announcement of North Korea are fight against Imperial Aggressor over what we loves for long times

Greeting. It are I, Park Hwang-Bo, here with other excite announcement from North Korea. Recent, we have observe war that people are fight across planet. We are promptly examined our treaty and realize that we has treaty on both side of conflict.

Kim Jong-Il, using ultimate wisdom, realized that there are only one options: to fight ourself.

Kim Jong-Il went through each nation in North Koreas and gave them either numbers "1" or "2". He was about to orders them to fight each others when his secretaries bursts into the room to tell hims that he didn't has to follow treaties to go to wars. He could just fight for alliance that he likes.

Kim Jong-Il thought this was much better idea that fighting himself, because he could get hurts. And finally decided that USNs would be good alliance.

Cora, or fluffyewungas, leader of USN, was a chick. And the Dear Leader thought he could scores some serious booties if he fought for hers. He watched "Manswers" and found out that chicks dig it when you beat up peoples for them.

And even if Cora was a man, like most girls on Planet Bob, he could just dress her ups in a bikini, and pretends he's dating a steroid-pumped bodybuilder or a women's rights activist. And he could just pretend the bulge in her pants was advanced cervical cancer.

So he asked USN who they were fighting, and they said iFOK, so he figured he should attack them, in the name of love and not having to pay for it this time. Kim Jong-Il and North Korea had spent so much time not at war, they forgot how to do it. All they'd been doing was signing treaties. So since that's all they're good at, here is the NNK - iFOK Treaty of War

Article I: Mutual War

The undersigned agree to engage in a state of war that does not adhere, and shall never adhere, to the ethical and international standards of warfare. The undersigned agree to contantly barrage each other with hateful messages, and to insult the each other's mothers at least twice a day for this treaty to remain valid.

Article II: Mutual Surrender

Should a party decide that their mothers have been insulted enough, they may surrender to the other unconditionally, thereby subjecting them to numberous verbal, physical and your-motherial torment.

Article III: Espionage

Neither alliance may tell the other about the espionage being commited within the other undersigned alliance. Doing so will mean the alliance commiting espionage is freakin' stupid.

Article IV: Termination

This treaty shall only be termined once Article II has been successfully completed, and sufficient torment has been inflicted upon the losing party.

The Undersigned do agree to respect and adhere to the Articles written above, both in the spirit and letter in which they are written.

Signed for the Nutty North Koreans,

Kim Jong-Il, Dear Leader

Nutty North Koreans is shocked and disgusted that \m/ would declare war on someone, even if this is a planet where war occurs all the time. And we are astounded that they'd dislike someone telling them to follow a certain set of rules that aren't theirs. We find it deplorable that they'd want to keep their soveriegnty and not do what another alliance views as correct. This is obviously a troubled and mentally unstable enemy that we're fighting, and they must be stopped.

By Kaiser Gutenhagen

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