There once was an old woman who found a cobra in the snow dying. She asked the snake..
"If I take you in, and nurse you back to health, will you bite me?"
The snake replied, "Of course not"
After a week, the woman had nursed the cobra back to health, and as she was feeding it, it bit her. As she lay on the floor dying, she said, "But Cobra, why did you bite me, I cared for you!"
The cobra replied.. "Because I'm an F-ING COBRA YOU MORON!!!"
Good luck with that.