Declining Authority

[Generalissimo]

Savoonga Municipal School, Savoonga Village, Saint Lawrence Island, Procinctia

In the courtyard outside of Savoonga Municipal School Liska Atka, acting Generalissimo of Procinctia, called an announcement and press conference. With classes for the day ending students milled about the courtyard while school clubs began their afternoon activities. Attired in her usual school uniform Liska stood behind a podium, next to a row of military officers seated in tacky lawn chairs, in front of a crowd of the usual media people and more than a few relevant international dignitaries.

“As everyone here already knows Generalissimo had gone missing in Arctic waters, while searching for Queen Cybil who had vanished in Arctic waters, and has still not been located. In addition to Procinctia’s own efforts Austrian Naval vessels, Disparuean rescue teams, Dranaggan nomads, Divisions of Marscurian Pakistan soldiers, Molakian C130s, Viniland military search teams, and Zargathian Helicopters have all - at one point or another - participated in efforts to find Generalissimo.

It’s been more than a real-time month and nothing’s been found, I’m calling off the search, there’s nothing more that can reasonably be done.

If Generalissimo is not recovered by Tuesday, December 15 Real-Time, he will be presumed dead and memorial services will be held the following Thursday. On Tuesday whoever holds the position acting of generalissimo of Procinctia will receive the position, rank, and title of Generalissimo of Procinctia in earnest. As acting of generalissimo of Procinctia this would default to me, however, I have no intention of accepting. Tuesday I will resign as acting generalissimo – leaving generalissimo to the next highest ranked officer in Procinctia’s military.

Before I leave office there are a few minor things that need to be taken care of. . .

By the authority of vested in me as acting of generalissimo I declare myself, Liska Atka, to be emancipated as a minor, and with all the privileges and responsibilities of an adult by Procinctian law.

The outstanding $700,000,000 reward offered by Procinctia for finding my older sister, Kiska Atka, is hereby rescinded. $700,000,000 is a lot of money – money better spent elsewhere in Procinctia’s redevelopment. Today the government of Procinctia declares Kiska Atka dead, it was a nuclear weapon, anyone who isn’t Kaiser Martens couldn’t survive that.

Like Generalissimo’s last conference, perhaps in his memory, anyone here is free to ask any question - anything that you feel needs to asked is acceptable because no question is too personal.”

Liska Atka, acting Generalissimo of Procinctia

Edited December 14, 2009 by Generalissimo

[Vedran]

"Have you considered the possibility that Generalissimo faked his death because he wanted to get away from the pressure of being a Generalissimo?"

[Generalissimo]

"Have you considered the possibility that Generalissimo faked his death because he wanted to get away from the pressure of being a Generalissimo?"

I seriously doubt it.

Generalissimo is Generalissimo – it’s been his only identity for decades.

Theories suggesting Generalissimo faked his own death and is living a new life are popular amongst consperacy theorists – and not entirely without merit. Everyone knows Generalissimo has ‘died’ before, assumed dead incidents where they didn’t find the body, I wouldn’t put it past him.

Even if Generalissimo really abandoned the country he founded, Procinctia still needs leadership.

Edited December 14, 2009 by Generalissimo

[Tahsir]

Perhaps Generalissimo found Kiska, and is living a life alone in the wilderness with her?

Additionally, the Dranaggan nomads have NOT searched for anyone in the Arctic. No one came to pick them up, so they never arrived.

Edited December 14, 2009 by Tahsir Re

[Manetheren]

It is becoming more and more clear that Procinctia is incapable of governing itself. As its people fall more and more into poverty, its government remains incapable of restoring basic services and security to its people.

[Eggman Empire]

It is becoming more and more clear that Procinctia is incapable of governing itself. As its people fall more and more into poverty, its government remains incapable of restoring basic services and security to its people.

The Eggman Empire has been around long enough to know that these types of words usually lead to troop movements and violation of national sovereignty. Unless you're offering to help Procinctia with aid and rebuilding efforts, stow that type of chatter.

The Eggman Empire sympathizes for Procinctia's loss. Generalissimo may not have been the best leader, but he valiantly struggled to hold his nation together. We hope Generalissimo is found in short order. If not, we wish Liska Atka a long and fruitful reign as Procinctia's Generalissimo. Should Procinctia, or Liska, ever need anything, they only need to look north.

[loannes]

Today the government of Procinctia declares Kiska Atka dead, it was a nuclear weapon, anyone who isn’t Kaiser Martens couldn’t survive that.

"I heard that Valerie person is annoyingly adept at surviving nukes."

It is becoming more and more clear that Procinctia is incapable of governing itself. As its people fall more and more into poverty, its government remains incapable of restoring basic services and security to its people.

"Tahoe makes a fair point. However, we hope they are aware that any war would cause even more damage to Procinctia."

-HRH King James II

[Generalissimo]

It is becoming more and more clear that Procinctia is incapable of governing itself. As its people fall more and more into poverty, its government remains incapable of restoring basic services and security to its people.

How does my decision today in any way indicate Procinctia is incapable of governing itself?

Tahoe's government might want to wait for the results of Procinctia’s upcoming elections to make such an assertion.

Procinctia’s progress seems excessively protracted to Tahoe because of time-cartographic relativity; in Tahoe’s defense things really are going slowly, if only because everything in Procinctia looks sluggish to someone in Tahoe. Time in Procinctia progresses at Generalissimo Scale Real-Time, the slowest observed rate of temporal advancement, so reconstruction and redevelopment moves accordingly.

While Procinctia is in shambles economically, insecurity is not nearly the issue Tahoe believes it to be.

Procinctia is surprisingly one of the most secure places in this world; no crime, no internal violence, no rebellion.

Edited December 14, 2009 by Generalissimo

[Generalissimo]

Perhaps Generalissimo found Kiska, and is living a life alone in the wilderness with her?

I would hope my sister able to make better decisions for herself.

If Generalissimo found Kiska and is living a life alone in the wilderness with her, it would be their business, and I could only wish them well.

Additionally, the Dranaggan nomads have NOT searched for anyone in the Arctic. No one came to pick them up, so they never arrived.

It might be difficult for the ever pragmatic Dranagg to comprehendible, I believe such an offer counts as participation, sentiment is as important as outcome - and Procinctia always appreciates assistance from friends. Edited December 14, 2009 by Generalissimo

[Generalissimo]

The Eggman Empire sympathizes for Procinctia's loss. Generalissimo may not have been the best leader, but he valiantly struggled to hold his nation together. We hope Generalissimo is found in short order. If not, we wish Liska Atka a long and fruitful reign as Procinctia's Generalissimo. Should Procinctia, or Liska, ever need anything, they only need to look north.

Eggman Empire’s sentiment is appreciated, the Empire has long proven itself amongst Procinctia’s staunchest supporters.

On a more personal note Eggman Empire’s Avita Karnikov, her friendship and strength, has helped me through the insurmountable obstacles – and has been my closest confidant and an indispensable consultant throughout my regime. . . I can't thank her enough.

Edited December 14, 2009 by Generalissimo

[Generalissimo]

"I heard that Valerie person is annoyingly adept at surviving nukes."

"My sister isn’t like Martens or Valerie, most people don’t survive point-blank high-yield nuclear explosions, Kiska couldn’t have survived that.

It’s been a long time, and despite the largest reward offered in the history of mankind, she’s still MIA.

If Kiska was really ok, she would have tried contacting me, I’m sure of it, i. . . i . . . I have to accept she’s gone."

Edited December 14, 2009 by Generalissimo

[KingChris]

"Liska, will you marry me?" - Reporter Soon to be Fired

Edited December 15, 2009 by KingChris

[KaiserMelech Mikhail]

Urgent Message to Liska, Acting Generalissimo of Procinctia:

Do not declare Generalissimo dead. stop.

News through conversations with locals. stop.

Polar bear-Urdu translators have heard tales. stop.

Bearded man in tattered uniform has been stealing and eating young. stop.

May be Generalissimo. stop.

Extensive searches by our men will continue. stop.

[Generalissimo]

"Liska, will you marry me?" - Reporter Soon to be Fired

"Liska, will you marry me?" - Reporter Soon to be Fired

Liska breaks out into outright laughter, “Hahahahah. . . wait . . . oh . . . you’re not joking are you? No offense intended - despite attending a few of my press conferences I don’t actually know you, and I’m not inclined to accept marriage proposals from strangers. There’s also the slight matter that I’m a sixteen-year-old girl while you’re at least forty, that’s just creepy. I’m going to have to decline.

Please stop crying. . . um. . . I’m sure you’ll find someone else elsewhere? Maybe some lucky girl a little closer to your. . . err. . . demographic?

In the meantime, if you’ll calm down, security will escort you to the nearest pub to drown your sorrows out in quality vintage Procinctian alcohol."

Edited December 15, 2009 by Generalissimo

[KingChris]

Liska breaks out into outright laughter, “Hahahahah. . . wait . . . oh . . . you’re not joking are you? No offense intended - despite attending a few of my press conferences I don’t actually know you, and I’m not inclined to accept marriage proposals from strangers. There’s also the slight matter that I’m a sixteen-year-old girl while you’re at least forty, that’s just creepy. I’m going to have to decline.

Please stop crying. . . um. . . I’m sure you’ll find someone else elsewhere? Maybe some lucky girl a little closer to your. . . err. . . demographic?

In the meantime, if you’ll calm down, security will escort you to the nearest pub to drown your sorrows out in quality vintage Procinctian alcohol."

The reporter looked utterly shocked. "Forty? What the @$%&, I'm nineteen you moron!" As a security guard approached him, he tried to rip his head off. Tried...

[Comrade]

Us, the Molakian C130 piolits and crew, have decided to settle in Procinta, the Old Homeland of Molakia, and continue to search for Generalissimo even after his "Death". A body must be found!

-Joint statement from Molakian Airforce Search and Rescue team sent to Procinta

A Molakian Soldier stands up.

"With the rumors coming from our Nation of the return of Alexei Romanov, is it possible that Generalissimo IS Alexei? They look alike, and when Gen' disappeared, Alexei reappeared....weirder things have happened."

Edited December 17, 2009 by Comrade

[Generalissimo]

The reporter looked utterly shocked. "Forty? What the @$%&, I'm nineteen you moron!" As a security guard approached him, he tried to rip his head off. Tried...

The black-suited security official took a few steps back before motioning for reinforcements, several soldiers quickly filled the gap.

A lone reporter probably wasn’t a match for a two-dozen militia soldiers with clubs, tasers, and cattle prods. Probably. . .

Behind the podium Liska tried to ignore the impending scuffle and attempted to carry on, “Continuing. . .” [sounds of fighting]. . .

“on with. . .” [sounds of fighting]. . .

“ahem, continuing on with” [sounds of fighting]. . . “continuing” [extended pause]. . .

“ok then, moving on” [increased sounds of fighting]

Liska facepalmed

Edited December 17, 2009 by Generalissimo

[Generalissimo]

Us, the Molakian C130 piolits and crew, have decided to settle in Procinta, the Old Homeland of Molakia, and continue to search for Generalissimo even after his "Death". A body must be found!

-Joint statement from Molakian Airforce Search and Rescue team sent to Procinta

”Sure, why not?

While we’re curtailing our efforts you’re all more than free to continue the search.

By the power vested in me as acting generalissimo of Procinta I hereby declare you all Procintan citizens, with all of the privileges and responsibilities of citizens by Procinctian law, if anyone has any objections speak now or forever hold your peace."

Liska points at a random Molakian, “Congradulations, you’re now promoted to Major, commanding your own as-of-yet unnamed permanent search and rescue unit, an independent command – perhaps it’s own service branch of Procinta’s armed forces.”

[Generalissimo]

A Molakian Soldier stands up.

"With the rumors coming from our Nation of the return of Alexei Romanov, is it possible that Generalissimo IS Alexei? They look alike, and when Gen' disappeared, Alexei reappeared....weirder things have happened."

”I’ve always thought the similarities between Generalissimo and Alexei superficial, but with sharing a mutual Castro motif confusion is understandable. Generalissimo and Alexei have been seen together in the same room multiple times, but if Alexei Romanov really was dead Generalissimo could have taken his place, meaning the Alexei involved in the coup d'etat during Molakia’s invasion of Finland was really Generalissimo the whole time – which is a ridiculous consperacy theory.

To be fair to your viewpoint I’ll have the Slavorussian government look into it before the end of my term, they already have most of Generalissimo’s biological data on record - if it’s reasonably possible to have a sample of it Slavorussia probably already does.”

Edited December 17, 2009 by Generalissimo

[KingChris]

The black-suited security official took a few steps back before motioning for reinforcements, several soldiers quickly filled the gap.

A lone reporter probably wasn’t a match for a two-dozen militia soldiers with clubs, tasers, and cattle prods. Probably. . .

Behind the podium Liska tried to ignore the impending scuffle and attempted to carry on, “Continuing. . .” [sounds of fighting]. . .

“on with. . .” [sounds of fighting]. . .

“ahem, continuing on with” [sounds of fighting]. . . “continuing” [extended pause]. . .

“ok then, moving on” [increased sounds of fighting]

Liska facepalmed

Somehow that reporter was still hanging on in the fight. As he noticed that the guards were armed, he tried to run around and distract the guards by pulling down their pants.

[Generalissimo]

Urgent Message to Liska, Acting Generalissimo of Procinctia:

Do not declare Generalissimo dead. stop.

News through conversations with locals. stop.

Polar bear-Urdu translators have heard tales. stop.

Bearded man in tattered uniform has been stealing and eating young. stop.

May be Generalissimo. stop.

Extensive searches by our men will continue. stop.

Savoonga Village’s telegraph was closed for the afternoon, with the staff off to see Liska’s announcement (there’s nothing better to do on Saint Lawrence Island anyway), Liska wasn’t be able to respond until hours after the event. Athough her telegraph operation skills were a little rusty, Liska transmitted a readable response.

Generalissimo has already been declared dead. Stop.

Sending you a transcript of the speech. Stop.

Continued efforts are appreciated. Stop.

Clarify Polar bear-Urdu translators. Stop

Sending new Molakian detachment to look into rumors. Stop

[Generalissimo]

Somehow that reporter was still hanging on in the fight.

As he noticed that the guards were armed, he tried to run around and distract the guards by pulling down their pants.

A petite rookie militia recruit lost her dress skirt to the reporter’s effort, the soldier was fortunately wearing jogging shorts under her uniform saving her from what would have been embarrassing (yet erotic) immodesty. It didn’t work on anyone else, for these troops were equipped with the most technologically advanced protection offered to any soldier in Procinctian history – belts. Edited December 17, 2009 by Generalissimo

[Comrade]

”Sure, why not?

While we’re curtailing our efforts you’re all more than free to continue the search.

By the power vested in me as acting generalissimo of Procinta I hereby declare you all Procintan citizens, with all of the privileges and responsibilities of citizens by Procinctian law, if anyone has any objections speak now or forever hold your peace."

Liska points at a random Molakian, “Congradulations, you’re now promoted to Major, commanding your own as-of-yet unnamed permanent search and rescue unit, an independent command – perhaps it’s own service branch of Procinta’s armed forces.”

The Molakian looks around.

"Uh, What? Im doing what?" Said the 'Major'.

[KingChris]

A petite rookie militia recruit lost her dress skirt to the reporter’s effort, the soldier was fortunately wearing jogging shorts under her uniform saving her from what would have been embarrassing (yet erotic) immodesty. It didn’t work on anyone else, for these troops were equipped with the most technologically advanced protection offered to any soldier in Procinctian history – belts.

Seeing that his devious plan wasn't working, the reporter then dashed up to the stage to try to pull down Liska's skirt.

[Generalissimo]

As the reporter dashed towards Liksa the honor guard of Procinctian soldiers put themselves between the assailant and their generalissimo, exactly three warnings were given before they simultaneously open fired,

A torrent of gunfire erupted and the rouge reporter was engulfed in a wall of hot lead, prematurely ending that man’s journalism career - if it was any consolation he would become the day’s news.

The ex-reporter from the previous Proctinia press conference attended. "Generalissimo is still alive and still out there. If he can survive in this craphole, he will definitely survive in the Arctic.

"That being said, Liska, will you marry me now?"

You’ve created a time paradox !

Continue? Y/N

Edited December 20, 2009 by Generalissimo