Silicon Valley

[Chancellor Bismarck]

Silicon Valley

By: Pacifism, of M*A*S*H

Literary Work Sponsored by the Independent Book Publishing Company, August 1, 2009

Chapter 1

Everyone was excited about tonight. It was said that Doitzel, after reading a great book of fiction, was said to have come up with a great idea. Doitzel was well-respected among the other peoples of Silicon Valley, so everyone was perfectly ready to sacrifice collecting their taxes for one hour.

Slowly but surely, the people gathered from all around the valley. Rebel Virginia, the old man who owned the Powder House, sat in the far corner of the meeting room, with a pitcher of water and a glass. Junkalunka, nicknamed because of his collecting habits, sat near the middle with his wife and children. On the table next to him, Lord Valentine sat with his family besides him also. Other notables slowly gathered inside the room, and took their seats.

Suddenly, the bell tower tolled midnight, and a hush overtook the room. Doitzel, a man well approaching his later years, slowly stood up with a cane and approached the front of the room.

“Ladies and Gentlemen, I appreciate you coming out here on such short notice. I understand that it can be a burden for many of you, especially with your families. I had a great vision a few days ago, while reading a great book by a man named “George Orwell”. It was called Animal Farm, about a group of animals who were oppressed by their owner until they rebelled against him, and set up a society of freedom. It reminded me much of our current situation, with our Landlord, Pacifica, always collecting our rent and a few dimes on the side. Our chairs go unfurnished, our roofs unshingled, and our air conditioning never works. However, we are still forced to pay our rent to Pacifica. For what, I ask? What do we receive in return? Nothing, my fair people, nothing. But those that decide not to pay their rent, are always forcefully evicted, and beaten to death by our landlord.

“Why do we continue in such a miserable estate? Is it the way of life, that those who are oppressed should remain as such? No, my people, no! This is not the way life is supposed to be. We are meant to be free people, roaming our Valley, farming our fields, tending to our flocks, in peace! Without interference or destruction, or fear of brutality by some outside influence. Why, then, do we continue? I’ll tell you why, my dear people. Pacifica. Pacifica is the root of our problem. We tend our fields, and he gets all the crop. We tend our flocks, and he takes all the sheep. Without Pacifica, we would be free.

“So then, the problem is clear. We must be rid of Pacifica in order to achieve freedom. It reminded me of a song my mother taught me a long, long time ago:

To the tune of “Welcome to Duloc, it’s a perfect town” from Shrek

Away down south

Was a land of good

Where the people all laughed

And they sang a tune

It was happy and so jolly

And they lived and they weren’t cocky

For they lived in a land of peace.”

The tune had an immediate effect on the people gathered there. Within moments, everyone knew the tune, and were singing it at the top of their lungs.

The racous chorus from the meeting room awoke Pacifica away on the edge of the valley. He walked outside and shot his gun at the meeting room, thinking that hooligans had taken refuge there. Immediately, all the people dispersed in separate directions, going back to their atrocious homes and refuge places.

Chapter 2

Everyone began preparations for the great day that was to come. They did not know when it was to come, but they imagined it many many years after their lifetimes. Therefore, they waited and prepared.

It came much sooner than expected. A few days after the meeting, Doitzel passed away. When Pacifica was told, she came outside and told everyone to dig a pit to bury him in. This was done, and Pacifica proceeded to just toss Doitzel’s body into the grave. Everyone became infuriated. Johnny, who was considered Mostly Harmless by much of the populace, and Monty, who was known to have quite a Viridian Entente, proceeded to throw rocks and stones at Pacifica. Soon, everyone was involved, and Pacifica went fleeing to the hills.

Everyone was agape, and looked at one another. They then proceeded to run around the valley, destroying everything that belonged to Pacifica: The guns, the bills, the house, everything. Every last trace of Pacifica was routed out of the valley. Finally, they met in the meeting room to discuss the future.

Johnny and Monty, the smartest of the group, immediately began talking of the glorious days to come. Freedom from oppression, no more hard working, and plentiful food for all. They decided to begin constructing anew, with the materials that Pacifica had left behind in her flight. Gathering up the wood from the houses they had knocked down, they repaired their own houses, and fields, and made anew their home that was previously so decrepit. Once the day’s work was done, they stepped back and admired the new world they had created.

-----END OF PART ONE, TO BE CONTINUED-----

[Chancellor Bismarck]

reserved for continuation

[Chancellor Bismarck]

reserved for continuation

[Chancellor Bismarck]

reserved for possible continuation or Wrap-Up Conclusion

[Scigirl543]

Paci, I love you, but, really....why do you have time to write all this?

[Chancellor Bismarck]

Paci, I love you, but, really....why do you have time to write all this?

Sci I haven't seen you in forever!

OOC: Mainly because last night I finished up my Key Club stuff for the beginning of this month, and now today is free time. I read a topic and it reminded me of how much the current situation exactly matches that of Animal Farm by George Orwell, so I figured that I'd write a parody of it including the situations from what's currently happening, to demonstrate what will probably happen and is already occurring.

[Believland]

Heh I have no idea what to say to this. Some of this seems like it should have been made while Vox was still around. Others seem like it was meant for manic Monday.