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People Rejoyce, Coffers Tighten in Monkey Time


Zerileous
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Lately the people of Monkey Time have been celebrating liberation from forced labor by the government. The Labor Camps, which were destroyed in late February, played a key role in the economy of Monkey Time. Zerileous, Dictatorial Prime of Monkey Time blames a pre-occupation with expensive booze and fast women for his failure to erect new camps in a timely manner, and apologized to himself for the associated drop in profit margins. He assures the citizens of Monkey Time that their service will continue in the future, and apologies for any false hope the may have taken from the break in forced labor. Zerileous was quoted in a recent press conference,

The people of Monkey Time are the backbone of our success, and their labor is critical to our survival. Without all of their hard work, this great nation would not be able to afford the maintenance of our intricate, high-tech, infrastructure system, nor our military fleet, airforce, and nuclear stockpile. I appreciate the hard work each and every one of you put into making this nation great, and I know you are grateful for my strong guidance in these struggling times.

A few individuals are said to have been shot during the speech, for trying to approach the dictator with signs in protest of future Labor Camps. Government officials refused to commend on the killings, and said that despite their unpopularity, the Camps would be rebuilt and the people would be entertained by religious and governmental monuments.

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