Murder Most Unserious

[jeff744]

Sergeant Junaid was sitting in a local fast food restaurant when he received a call on his cellphone 'Detective, we have a murder at XXX', Junaid smirked, detective, in truth it was sheer luck he passed the test, the entire thing had been multiple choice and he had used a die to decide which ones to fill in. At heart Junaid was still a jarhead and he spent more time chasing his donuts down with beer than his job. Junaid sat for a couple more minutes and finished his burger before grabbing his fries and pop and walking out to his car.

Junaid parked outside the apartment building and went to the apartment only to find it closed, Junaid knocked but when no-one answered he decided to go in the old fashioned way and kicked down the door. Junaid was startled when nothing looked out of place and was extremely clean, he was searching to rooms for the body when he got another call 'Detective Junaid, go to the window', Junaid went to the window and a person in the apartment across the street waved at him 'you're in the wrong building detective'.

Junaid entered the proper apartment, he walked over to the body, knelt down and poked the corpse on the cheek 'Yup, he's dead', Junaid picked the mans wallet from the back pocket and found some ID 'Seems this guys was a Marscurian Siberia citizen, somebody call HQ and tell them to contact the MS embassy about this' as the men looked away Juniad quickly relieved the man of the bills in his wallet and continued to do his job.

Message to Marscurian Siberian embassy:

[quote]One of your citizens is believed to have been murdered in Qatar-Bahrain, we apologize for this and will begin making arrangements to send the body back to Marscurian Siberia if you wish.[/quote]

[KaiserMelech Mikhail]

Reply:
We understand, and thank you for alerting us. If it is not too much trouble for you, we were wondering if we could send some of our own policemen to aid in your investigation.

[jeff744]

We will accept the aid, help finding the criminals responsible is always welcome.

[KaiserMelech Mikhail]

Back at police HQ, the police teams were being read off. "Geld... Tracking down counter-fitters. Aish... Murder in Pyotrgrad. Schneld... Hunting a bank robber." The list went on and on, with everyone busy. "Oh no," the director said, "oh God no. All that's left is... is... Danglowitz."

Yankel Danglowitz was literally the worst lieutenant on the force. He and his men have several infractions on their records, including letting drug dealers escape, destroying evidence by way of ingestion, and even participating in a few hit-and-runs themselves, resulting in the deaths of 3 people. It has come to the point where they don't even get patrol cars anymore. Now, no sane police chief would ever send Danglowitz to the scene of a murder to actually do police work, but by now it was hoped that he would make a wrong turn somewhere, wander off into the desert and get eaten by a camel.

"Yes sir! I understand sir! I will do my best sir! You put your trust in the right men!" With that, Danglowitz and his team were on the next plane to Tianjin, which would lead to the next plane to Mumbai, which would lead to the next plane to Tehran, which would lead to the next plane to Qatar. When they arrived, they looked for the policemen who they thought would be meeting them to brief them on the situation.

[jeff744]

Juniad lay in bed as his alarm beeped, he looked at the numbers 4:00am and groaned, he hit the snooze and went back to sleep only to be woken up ten minutes later, he grabs the alarm and tossed it out the window, a regular thing resulting in him keeping his window open and a small closet full of alarm clocks. The flight he was supposed to greet was to arrive at 7:00am, at 7:45am Juniad would receive a call on his cell from his Lieutenant asking if he had picked up the detective at the airport, Juniad, still half asleep replied 'uhhh.....yes?'. Juniad got dressed and went off to pick up the detective, hopefully he hadn't tried to find his way alone.

[KaiserMelech Mikhail]

Luckily, the Marscurian team did not try to find their way on their own. Implementing skills they developed since childhood, they bought an ice cream cone from a vendor at the airport, then sat on the floor right by the doors. When a passerby inquired to whether they were alright, they simply responded that they weren't allowed to talk to strangers, and went right back to staring at the doors. When the Qatari detective ran into the airport, they simply stood up, brushed themselves off, and went to go meet him.

Edited December 20, 2010 by KaiserMelech Mikhail

[jeff744]

Junaid looked at the men, he could see ice cream on their suits, he checked over his uniform, it was one of the two things that made him stand out from the other detectives, his track record was the other. He stared at them for a time before deciding they were likely even worse than he was, good, they would make him look good. "Hello, I am Sergeant Junaid, I will be working with you on....", he checked his cheat notes "ah, the guy that got killed".

[KaiserMelech Mikhail]

"Ah, 45 minutes late," Danglowitz thought to himself, "this guy must make us look awesome!" He walked up to greet Junaid. "Yes, the dead guy," he said, "tell me, just how dead is he? Is he a little dead, pretty badly dead, or OH MY GOD WHAT THE HELL IS THAT dead?"