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Nutty North Korean Announcement


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There is no time for Park Hwang-Bo's broken English ramblings. Disaster has struck North Korea! A coup!

Early yesterday morning, armed guerillas going under the name "Yo Wang Rebels", smeared vulgar slurs across the Dear Leader's private Pringle factory, to oppose his ban on Justin Bieber's new hit single "One Time". And we are going to show you only a few examples, for any more would surely be fatal.

[color="#FF0000"]* Warning: If you are pregnant, have a severe blood condition or are prone to dying at the sight of vulgar slurs, please leave the topic[/color]

'I am not particularly fond of the Dear Leader'
'The Dear Leader is not very nice'

For those of you who now feel the need to vomit repeatedly, there is an official Huggies-brand barf bucket in the corner. Please form a single-file line and try to keep your vomit to less than 2 litres.

The Dear Leader, who had recently suffered a heart attack (A combination of the rebellion and the Family pack KFC meal with large fries he had just downed), ordered for the insurrection to be put down.

Unfortunately, that just caused an erection of the insurrection. The rebels raided the factory and had wrought havoc, drawing moustaches on Kim Jong-Il portraits, removing the caps from pens and taking jam from the jars with their fingers.

The Dear Leader was furious! How would he enjoy toast and marmalade again? In a justified rage, Kim Jong-Il sparked "The Vietjam War"

The following documentary was produced by Park Hwang-Bo to depict the fruitless struggles of the rebels.

[url="http://www.transyoutube.com/trans.swf?v=fJy2zsYKOSo&s=2570"]Vietjam War[/url]

Uhhh...but Kim Jong-Il then decided [s]at gunpoint[/s] to let the rebels run the country, because Kim Jong-Il is just such an awesome guy, and definitely did not lose the Vietjam War at all.

Because of this, NNK is [s]not very[/s] almost too happy to present to you its new Government.

[color="#FF0000"]* To the audience: You may now clap and cheer

Heads of State:
Kim Jong-Il
Justin Bieber

Head of NNK:
Dear Leader Chief Buttscratcher (IA): Gorchin
Dear Leader Chief Nutscratcher (FA): Vesta

Dear Leader Dietitian (MoE): Sarikitty
Dear Leader Personal Trainer (MoD): Teh Squishy
Dear Leader Translator (MoFA): Pikachujc / Pimpleman
Dear Leader Official Piss-On (MoIA): Britwarlord

Dear Leader Bathroom Staff (Lowly Individuals):
Je Mange Le Chat

And as another result of this fiery revolution, NNK has switched its protectorate with FoB to an ODP, and is now being protected by USN (They'll make an official, infinitely more boring announcement).

We also have a new IRC channel, #NNK. Apparently you people found #AdjectiveEthnicity too long and hard to remember.

But before we go, I'd like to pose you this question:
"If Kim Jong-Il and the bad guy from Iron Man 2 got into a fight, who would win?"

That is all. Have a Kim Jongrific day.


Edited by Vesta
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[quote name='Vesta' date='13 April 2010 - 02:25 PM' timestamp='1271190323' post='2259004']['I am not particularly fond of the Dear Leader'[/quote]
Do you kiss your mothers with that mouth?!
Congrats guys. Give my best to the Dear Leader regarding his recent heart attack :P

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Haha, this announcement has kaiser written all over it. love you guys.

o/ NNK

Answer to question: Total Destruction would occur. This battle has happened once before, millions and millions (probably more) years ago. That bad guy whipped Kim Jong-Il while Kim Jong-Il simultaneously threw a starving citizen at him with great force. The resulting explosion created the universe. And what Kim Jong-Il giveth, Kim Jong-IL can taketh away.

Edited by Infidel Israeli
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[quote name='Vesta' date='13 April 2010 - 04:25 PM' timestamp='1271190323' post='2259004']But before we go, I'd like to pose you this question:
"If Kim Jong-Il and the bad guy from Iron Man 2 got into a fight, who would win?"[/quote]

The Great Marshal would challenge him to a game of golf and then humiliate his opponent by shooting 38 under par with 11 holes-in-one.

As said opponent wept in shame, the Dear Leader would kick him in the nuts.

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