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Caucasian Press Conference, Take 2


loannes
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A Kitexian reporter stood up "We know very little of Caucasian history, yet we do know there were two attempts HRH James I life. We'd like to know who would be driven to do such a horrid thing as to try and assassinate their leader."

OOC: Don't be all mean, I clearly stated that we do not know much about Caucasia

Edited by kitex
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A Kitexian reporter stood up "We know very little of Caucasian history, yet we do know there were two attempts HRH James I life. We'd like to know who would be driven to do such a horrid thing as to try and assassinate their leader."

OOC: Don't be all mean, I clearly stated that we do not know much about Caucasia

"Ah, the age-old mystery. We have yet to find the culprits of those attempts, despite joint Caucasian-Grøenlandian efforts. It's thought that the old Communist Party of Drakoria, which vanished and bombed a port on the Caspian Sea, is behind it. But I've been well protected since the last time." His eyes flitted to the rooftops, where a few dozen Liberty Guard snipers sat, and then back down. "Anything else?"

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"I do hope that the culprits get caught soon. Also, I'd like to know what HRH does in his spare time."

James chuckled. "Spare time? I hardly get it. Usually, I try to get some sleep, but if I get some time, Dan teaches me guitar. At this very time, however, free time is not a possibility. I would be at a Liberty Guards training camp, doing drills and all, but I took some time off to be with my wife." He smiled at Anzhelina.

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A New York Times reporter stood up. "What are your state secrets?"

Another reporter facepalmed and pulled him down. Standing up, he cleared his throat. "Firstly, please pardon my friend. It's his first time here."

"Hey!" The first reporter began to protest but the second reporter's hard glare silenced him.

"Very well, I have a question." The second reporter paused for a moment. "What is daily life like in Caucasia?"

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Another reporter stood up...no clear identification was on him, indicating he was freelance, but he had presented proper credentials to get into the conference.

"If it's not too personal...how did you two meet?"

"Not too personal at all," James said, after a glance towards and a nod from Anzhelina. "We first met when we were teenagers. We were both 15 at the time. Anzhelina's family came down to Georgia from Stravropol-Krai, and I was amongst those that greeted her. We spent two hours talking on a balcony of the Fortunatov estate, and we bonded from there on out."

A New York Times reporter stood up. "What are your state secrets?"

Another reporter facepalmed and pulled him down. Standing up, he cleared his throat. "Firstly, please pardon my friend. It's his first time here."

"Hey!" The first reporter began to protest but the second reporter's hard glare silenced him.

"Very well, I have a question." The second reporter paused for a moment. "What is daily life like in Caucasia?"

James and Anzhelina laughed, and the queen responded, "Daily life varies from place-to-place. 99.5% of working-age Caucasians are employed, and spend an average of eight hours a day at work. Children spend seven-and-a-half hours at school, and in most places, have minimal homework to do. The municipal governments tend to believe schoolwork stays at school, and policies reflect such. Kids spend their free time with sports, clubs, and games. Religion plays a fairly important part in the lives of Caucasians; Orthodox Christians, Protestants, Catholics, Muslims, and a surprising number of Buddhists spend parts of their weeks working with their houses of worship, or volunteering. The average standard of living is high.That's a rough overview, but really, there's no one response to it. If you ask ten Caucasians what their day is like, you get ten different answers."

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James and Anzhelina laughed, and the queen responded, "Daily life varies from place-to-place. 99.5% of working-age Caucasians are employed, and spend an average of eight hours a day at work. Children spend seven-and-a-half hours at school, and in most places, have minimal homework to do. The municipal governments tend to believe schoolwork stays at school, and policies reflect such. Kids spend their free time with sports, clubs, and games. Religion plays a fairly important part in the lives of Caucasians; Orthodox Christians, Protestants, Catholics, Muslims, and a surprising number of Buddhists spend parts of their weeks working with their houses of worship, or volunteering. The average standard of living is high.That's a rough overview, but really, there's no one response to it. If you ask ten Caucasians what their day is like, you get ten different answers."

The second reporter smiled and nodded. "Very well, that's all. Thank you for answering the question." He scribbled on his notepad and sat down.

However...

"You're hot!" The first reporter blurted out before he realized of what he'd blurted. The second reporter facepalmed deeply and stood up. "Please pardon my friend, once again. Now, if you may excuse me, I would like to have a word with my friend here." He said calmly through gritted teeth. (OOC: I assume the queen is beautiful and all that, but if not, then disregard this whole part :P)

"Hey--" The first reporter began to open his mouth to say something when he was escorted off his chair by the second reporter toward the back of the room. They went through a door and it closed.

A BONK! and then a THUD! could be heard a short time later.

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The second reporter smiled and nodded. "Very well, that's all. Thank you for answering the question." He scribbled on his notepad and sat down.

However...

"You're hot!" The first reporter blurted out before he realized of what he'd blurted. The second reporter facepalmed deeply and stood up. "Please pardon my friend, once again. Now, if you may excuse me, I would like to have a word with my friend here." He said calmly through gritted teeth. (OOC: I assume the queen is beautiful and all that, but if not, then disregard this whole part :P)

"Hey--" The first reporter began to open his mouth to say something when he was escorted off his chair by the second reporter toward the back of the room. They went through a door and it closed.

A BONK! and then a THUD! could be heard a short time later.

OOC: What, you think I'd have my king marry a hideous chick? :P

IC: Anzhelina blinked.

"My, that was entertaining," the freelance reporter muttered under his breath with a grin.

"So," he said, clearing his throat and speking more loudly. "Are there plans, sometime in the future, for children?"

James touched Anzhelina's hand and smiled. "Yes, there are. We've decided on two children. A boy and a girl."

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A freelance reporter threw his shoes at the queen and shouted "You ugly @#$%&!" He was then stabbed in the back by another freelance supporter, who then quickly said, "Pardon him. Anyway, as I understand, Her Most Royal Majesty The Queen became pregnant before marriage. Due to this, you may face some opposition for immorality. What do you say to this?"

Edited by KingChris
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"What if you have triplets?"

"I'll worry about that if it comes to it," Anzhelina said.

A freelance supporter threw his shoes at the queen and shouted "You ugly @#$%&!" He was then stabbed in the back by another freelance supporter, who then quickly said, "Pardon him. Anyway, as I understand, Her Most Royal Majesty The Queen became pregnant before marriage. Due to this, you may face some opposition for immorality. What do you say to this?"

Anzhelina sighed. "It wasn't until our honeymoon that I was impregnated. Care to revise your question?"

James added, "And when you're done with that, please accompany those kind men in the back to their vehicle." He gestured to four Liberty Guardsmen. "Is that man dead?"

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"Fine. Well, the Mayo News Network, a news channel of the now non-existent Mayo Empire, one stated that His Royal Highness King James once was a client of a prostitute who coincidentally is now the leader of Disparu. This happened long after the prostitute contracted gonorrhea. Your response? And those Liberty Guards will suffer the wrath of this knife sticking out of my friend's back before they get me. And yes, he's dead. D-E-D. Dead."

OOC: I just noticed I wrote freelance supporter instead of freelance reporter. FAIL :(

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"Fine. Well, the Mayo News Network, a news channel of the now non-existent Mayo Empire, one stated that His Royal Highness King James once was a client of a prostitute who coincidentally is now the leader of Disparu. This happened long after the prostitute contracted gonorrhea. Your response? And those Liberty Guards will suffer the wrath of this knife sticking out of my friend's back before they get me. And yes, he's dead. D-E-D. Dead."

OOC: I just noticed I wrote freelance supporter instead of freelance reporter. FAIL :(

"I had a blood test last week. I've got nothing. And I have no idea where the Mayo Empire even was. Now please go with the guards now or receive a .50 cal bullet in the skull."

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The man threw a knife in one of the guards's back. "But that doesn't disprove the fact that you had relations with a prostitute!"

"What fact?" James asked, rolling his eyes. "Anzhelina is the only woman I've ever had relations with." He watched the knife bounce off the soldier's gear. He then watched the same soldier raise a sniper rifle and fire a tranquilizer dart with enough anesthesia to down an elephant into the man's neck.

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"What fact?" James asked, rolling his eyes. "Anzhelina is the only woman I've ever had relations with." He watched the knife bounce off the soldier's gear. He then watched the same soldier raise a sniper rifle and fire a tranquilizer dart with enough anesthesia to down an elephant into the man's neck.

Yet another man stood up. "He does have a good point. News reports from the Fasci Empire, Hae da Fung, New Zealand, the Hanseatic Commowealth, Rebel Virginia, the Republic of Mariehamm, and Ardoria confirm the fact that you did, in fact, have relations with the Disparu prostitute. And I have no weapons, but I do agree that the Queen is an ugly @#$%&."

OOC: Apologies if attributing reports to small news stations from non-existent countries is god-modding If that's the case, then it's just Fasci Empire.

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A woman in the front stood up and shouted "What the hell kind of reporters are you? This is a fricken press conference, not a god damn gossip hour.

Name's LaFonda Montigo Dumbledore ExpendablePerson3, of Dependable News Channel 7. What's your current position on having another nation control a large chunk of land in the middle of your nation?"

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Yet another man stood up. "He does have a good point. News reports from the Fasci Empire, Hae da Fung, New Zealand, the Hanseatic Commowealth, Rebel Virginia, the Republic of Mariehamm, and Ardoria confirm the fact that you did, in fact, have relations with the Disparu prostitute. And I have no weapons, but I do agree that the Queen is an ugly @#$%&."

OOC: Apologies if attributing reports to small news stations from non-existent countries is god-modding If that's the case, then it's just Fasci Empire.

"Mkay. When those nations start existing again, I'll give a damn," James said. Another tranquilizer dart struck the second man. "I'd like to remind everyone that part of being at a press conference in Caucasia is courtesy."

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The Commonwealth of Texas News Channel

"And in international news, one person ended up dead at a Caucasian Press Conference. Two others were unconscious. Facts show that some Caucasian Liberty Guards fired at people.

Also, I wonder how the Caucasian News Team is doing here, since there hasn't been much action here in Texas recently."

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The Commonwealth of Texas News Channel

"And in international news, one person ended up dead at a Caucasian Press Conference. Two others were unconscious. Facts show that some Caucasian Liberty Guards fired at people.

Also, I wonder how the Caucasian News Team is doing here, since there hasn't been much action here in Texas recently."

When viewing this after the press conference, James said, "Eh, who cares? It's Texas."

OOC: Press conference is still going on. Stop doing random stuff in my conference like I do to other people!

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