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Declaration of Jihad in the name of GOD

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A Reading from the Holy Book of Goose, Chapter 4, Verses 16 to 20

In the Time Before Time...in fact, in the Time Before the Time Before Time, there was the Thought. And at the end of the Time Before Time, the Thought became the Idea, and the world was born.

But the birth was tumultuous, and wild, and the Idea was forgotten, locked away in the lands and people's of the new world. And lo, though they strived to fulfill the part of the Idea locked deep within them, they fell to strife and corruption and the way was obscured.

And there were those who felt the touch of the Idea more strongly, and rebelled against it, and struggled to assert a different idea, in spite of the great Idea. And they obscured the path and kept people's dreams clouded in fear and confusion, that their way might be lost, and the usurpers might prosper and be entertained.

But there was one in whom the Idea was made manifest, in whom the Idea and the Flesh were married, and the Goose was born. And the Goose did gather the masses, and teach them how not to fear, and did tell them of the Idea, and the Way. And when others who would defend the fledgling rebellion of the Idea against the Corruption fell under attack, the Goose did send word through his Voice, the Allied Threat, and his Sword, the Captain Impavid, to have his people take up arms. For though through force of arms, swathed in intimidation, was the Idea suppressed, through force of arms anointed in principle and retribution, tempered in restraint, would the Idea be reborn.

And so it was that the world found its way, and harmony could finally be pursued. And the Goose knew that while there would yet be obstacles and blunders, never again would the light of hope be completely extinguished from the land, and the Idea would not again be lost.

At this time, The Commonwealth enters into a state of war with the Global Democratic Alliance, pursuant to Article III of That GOD-Damned Treaty.

An act of war upon one signatory is to be considered an act of war upon the other and will be responded to with all available force, no activation required.



Head of State to The Commonwealth, Warmonger of GUARD, and Old Man with a Cane


The Preacher of Goose, Swordmaster, Slayer of Infidels, and Doer of Your Mum.

The Captain Impavid,

Sword of The Goose, High Priest of the WarFowl, Cybernetic Abomination From the Stars, Guardian of Pinata Culture, Generous Lover


The Hand of Goose, Master of Beward, Detroyer of the Deined, Preacher Apprentice of Goose, Chronicler of Big Words


The Shadow of Goose, Guru of Graphics, Builder of Pylons

Lord Brendan,

King of the Bank, Bringer of Death, FUN Survivor and Warrior of the Hydra

P.S.- This is all Ruben's fault, and we blame him fully for this.

/me yawns and goes back to plinking.....

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