zzzptm Posted April 16, 2009 Report Share Posted April 16, 2009 Spicy cumbia music plays as images of celebrities flash across the screen in a cheesy montage... ANNOUNCER: Tonight! on Nueva Vida Tonight! Who is Raasaa's new lady friend? The emperor of Nueva Vida has been sporting a new ruca, and she's as hot as a Veracruz summer... who is she? Is Gebiv suffering from the shame of untreated hairballs? NVT brings you the latest... What's this about Mayzie of One Touch Football and MagicalBricks? Only NVT has the dish on this EXCLUSIVE story! ... and NVT has exclusive coverage of the 10th annual Nueva Vida Swimsuit Competition, so don't touch that remote! Music calms down as the camera swoops in on your host for the show, Karla Zzzptinez... Bienvenidos y buenas noches, Planeta Roberto! Welcome again to another star-studded episode of Nueva Vida Tonight! We open with a look at who might become Nueva Vida's next empress. We noticed Raasaa's been showing up to fancy functions with a new female on his arm, and WOW is she a looker! Who is she? She's none other than Vollywood's freshest face, Chandni Gutierrez! She's up-and-coming fresh from her debut in the smash Main Bhi Hoon Naa and is taking box offices by storm with her latest hit, Michoacan Masala. Like Raasaa, she's from the community of Indian immigrants to the Aztec lands of Nueva Vida, and she's equally comfortable in a sari or a serape. Here's the happy couple at the 2009 Societa Filma Azteca "Squirrelly" awards function... check out her designer gown, a Mr. Nelchael original! Are there wedding bells in their future? Insiders say it's a definite maybe, but so far Ms. Chandni and Mr. Raasaa have told us that, "We're just good friends." Well, here's to good friendship, and we have the number of a great caterer if they decide to get any freindlier. Now over to Gebiv's hairball nightmare... He may be a Vidian military bigwig, but that big cat's got some issues with his own wig! Sources close to Gebiv have told Nueva Vida Tonight that he's been coughing up all over the Vidian High Command, and it's starting to impact his duties, allege some of his underlings. NONSENSE! says a spokesman for the VHC: "Mr. Gebiv has only a slight problem with so-called 'hairballs', and is seeing competent medical professionals for treatment. The condition in question is mild and has not had any adverse effect on the fulfillment of his charges. In fact, we are looking into the possibility of developing the so-called 'hairball' into a new weapons system, and I cannot comment further on that matter." Well, we'll see what the future holds for the Vidian military. If tabbies become standard issue for ground troops and manxes assigned to paratroopers, you'll know project hairball paid out with positive results. Over now to news about Mayzie... NVT has noticed a recent change in his signature on the NV forums: He's sporting a new badge... Is there a merger with NV in 1TF's future? The rumor mill is all abuzz about the possibilities, but, according to Mayzie and his NV BFF Magicalbricks, "We're just good friends." Well, with friends like that, you'll have a difficult time keeping them apart! ANNOUNCER cuts in... "We at Nueva Vida Tonight! are running a family-friendly program. Shame on anyone that inferred a sexual reference from the previous comment. We now return you to the program, already underway... And now we close with a few shots from the Nueva Vida Swimsuit Competition: Competitors took swimsuits, wadded them up, stuffed them into a tuna, and threw those stuffed tunas as far as they could. Looks like great fun! Protesters outside the competition insisted organizers were "Doin it wrong" and that swimsuits were not designed to be stuffed into tuna. That's all for Nueva Vida Tonight! See you again next time! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
karthikking Posted April 16, 2009 Report Share Posted April 16, 2009 (edited) Way to go Zzzptm Edit: First and obligatory Posting this will get me warned. Also lets dissect Gebiv lol. NV RULES. Edited April 16, 2009 by karthikking Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jason Salovsky Posted April 16, 2009 Report Share Posted April 16, 2009 Interesting I suppose... <insert something like "What is this? I don't even..." here> Posting this will get me warned.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Duncan King Posted April 16, 2009 Report Share Posted April 16, 2009 Z, I have no idea what you're saying, but it's great to see you around again. I guess I'll say, "Congrats (?) NV!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Terminal Posted April 16, 2009 Report Share Posted April 16, 2009 uhhh o/ NV Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KinKiac Posted April 16, 2009 Report Share Posted April 16, 2009 Good show! Although I wish I hadnt already read it once, lol! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zzzptm Posted April 16, 2009 Author Report Share Posted April 16, 2009 Think of it as an alliance status report with celebrity news and gossip added. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Innerspeaker Posted April 16, 2009 Report Share Posted April 16, 2009 <3 NV Raasaa, I'm soooo jealous Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
raasaa Posted April 16, 2009 Report Share Posted April 16, 2009 I looook way better than Salman Khan........ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
karthikking Posted April 16, 2009 Report Share Posted April 16, 2009 Fine you will get Amir Khan then happy. lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drai Posted April 16, 2009 Report Share Posted April 16, 2009 NV 1TF I look forward to more on this story brickles Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blackjax Posted April 16, 2009 Report Share Posted April 16, 2009 Think of it as an alliance status report with celebrity news and gossip added. Good issue. Maybe the next will showcase the scandalous drama that's been going on lately? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abdur Posted April 16, 2009 Report Share Posted April 16, 2009 Think of it as an alliance status report with celebrity news and gossip added. Interesting.... Good Job! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shigh707 Posted April 16, 2009 Report Share Posted April 16, 2009 I dont even? NV Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zzzptm Posted April 16, 2009 Author Report Share Posted April 16, 2009 Good issue. Maybe the next will showcase the scandalous drama that's been going on lately? You mean the REAL reason bassman looked "overwrought" last night? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mayzie Posted April 16, 2009 Report Share Posted April 16, 2009 The first time I get a shout out in one of these daft weekly news cast things and you portray me as MB's boyfriend. You listen to me Karla Zzzptinez, you and your huge face will be hearing from my lawyers. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Magicalbricks Posted April 17, 2009 Report Share Posted April 17, 2009 I've said it before... and I'll say it again. I'm so happy to be a member of Nueva Vida Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gears of War Posted April 17, 2009 Report Share Posted April 17, 2009 I have no idea what the OP said, but here's wishing good luck/condolences/congrats to NV. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thedrooling Posted April 17, 2009 Report Share Posted April 17, 2009 Why is there no mention of the avatar/signature scandal of one of NV's top posters Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zzzptm Posted April 17, 2009 Author Report Share Posted April 17, 2009 The first time I get a shout out in one of these daft weekly news cast things and you portray me as MB's boyfriend. You listen to me Karla Zzzptinez, you and your huge face will be hearing from my lawyers. We stand behind our revenue generation programming accurate and fair reporting. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zzzptm Posted April 17, 2009 Author Report Share Posted April 17, 2009 Why is there no mention of the avatar/signature scandal of one of NV's top posters That's for next week. Here's hoping you get arrested for it so we can get a ratings boost. We plan to have full coverage at that time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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