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What day is it?

Why it's....

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The Headlines tonight:

  • King Neptune's Bar overrun with Rodent infestation - Exterminators summoned
  • Doombird transforms into Mongoose to pursue age old grudge with COBRA

 

Welcome to The Day Today.

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COBRA Environmental Inspection orders closure of King Neptune's Bar - Rodent infestation cited.

- Neptunian Menace launches unwarranted assault on Ordo Cyberneticus

- Bitter Old Manbird offers to fund rogue activity against COBRA

 

For some time now, the alliance known as 'King Neptune's Bar' has been more than open regarding their sentiment towards COBRA and our allies. In summary? They are not exactly fans. Now of course, this is not something that we at COBRA are unfamiliar with, we rub people the wrong way on a fairly regular basis and we make no apologies for this. However those who have dealt with me in the past will recall that I am more than capable of being reasonable and diplomatic to resolve any disputes.

 

Unfortunately the same cannot be said with regard to the leader of King Neptune's Bar (despite his constant protestation to the contrary). Since their inception; Lord Hitchcock has cultivated an environment within his alliance's discord server which seeks to encourage aggressive behaviour from those who have an axe to grind with COBRA and our allies.

 

Now, being the patient and benevolent King that I am? I have, for the most part, turned a blind eye to the attempts to antagonise a response from us. The modus operandi of Lord Hitchcock and his affiliates strikes me as one which seeks to goad an aggressive response from COBRA so that he may climb upon his soapbox and decry our response to the deliberately belligerent dialogue he espouses and the actions taken by his affiliates- actions he has not openly endorsed but actions he has not denounced either. This dialogue and atmosphere he has sought to cultivate serves to encourage others to take up the mantle to attack us, so that he does not have to. 

 

To this end he has had some success. Most recently a nation known as "Wicked Empire" lead by The Dark Emperor had been running spy operations against a COBRA nation from within CLAWS.

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When those spy operations were exposed, the nation in question dropped the CLAWS affiliation and chose to attack us directly (To clarify: we do not consider this to be an action sponsored by CLAWS). It is my understanding that he was not ordered by anyone to do so, The Dark Emperor had been quite vocal about his desire to strike COBRA beforehand.

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Following this, the leader known as Banned (a now former member of DBDC) sent aid to The Dark Emperor with a view to funding his war efforts against us. This leader has been quite vocal about their intention to see COBRA rolled and willingness to fund anyone who will do so on account of him growing so fat to the point of irrelevance. Something I am sure they will freely attest to should they make an appearance in this thread (maybe not the irrelevance bit, that might be cutting a bit too close to his over-inflated ego)

 

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In response to this act of state sponsored terrorism, we at COBRA launched an assault on a DBDC nation as we do not take such behaviour lightly (See: Veracity). However, since Banned dropped affiliation with DBDC, we have offered peace to DBDC as we consider the matter to be one limited to the petty grudge Banned holds toward my predecessor and not something condoned by DBDC as a whole. I have been assured there exists no beef within DBDC toward COBRA and have communicated that the inverse is also true.

 

So you may be asking; what does this all have to do with King Neptune's Bar exactly? Banned is not a member, neither is The Dark Emperor. Surely these occurances have nothing to do with them? Well, you would be right to ask that and being the dilligent journalist I am? I have the answer for you dear readers:

 

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Here we can see a clear cut case of aggression against our ally Ordo Cyberneticus from a member of KNB, seemingly endorsed by the leader himself. Now I'm sure that the leader of KNB will come forward and deny he or Morphine had any knowledge that Ordo Cyberneticus are in fact allies of COBRA. Well.....

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This screen dates back to July so feigning ignorance is not going to fly in this scenario. Add this to the numerous counts of antagony promoted by Lord Hitchcock toward COBRA and our allies, the repeated threats and sponsoring of rogues from Banned (References available on request) I think it is more than reasonable to assume that the goal of KNB is to attempt the pursuit of our destruction with the help of the Mongoose known as Banned (because let's be real; Lord Hitchcock couldn't fight his way out of a paper bag on his own) As such, I cannot and I will not in good conscience sit idly by in the face of these repeated transgressions against my comrades.

 

To Summarise:

COBRA hereby formally recognises a state of hostilities with King Neptune's Bar and Mongoose in response to their aggressive actions and deeds directed toward us and in direct defense of Ordo Cyberneticus.

 

Oh, and Banned?

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Interesting, you left out the part of nuking new nations who refused to join your trade circles or attacking nations who choose to join KNB.

 

Your expectation of me being some world police is ridiculous and KNB recognizes your hostilities.

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Mongoose releases the following statement:

 

The following statement is a statement by Banned, and in no way necessarily represents the views of Mongoose.

 

I see your declaration of war, and your challenge that I, in no uncertain terms, hit you with my best shot.  In response to this, and for no other reason, and with no forethought or planning, I recognize your state of hostilities with Mongoose. However, I find your post lacking on the important matters of Planet Bob.  Not propaganda that I can't afford because my nation is small and defenseless.  The real issues of the day are the oppression and likely imprisonment of Franz Ferdinand.  And so I shall set aside for this moment all my embracing of neutrality and my peacenik nature, and make this solemn oath.  I will not rest until we can all unite with one standard greeting.  Free Franz.

 

 

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2 hours ago, Banned said:

Mongoose releases the following statement:

 

The following statement is a statement by Banned, and in no way necessarily represents the views of Mongoose.

 

I see your declaration of war, and your challenge that I, in no uncertain terms, hit you with my best shot.  In response to this, and for no other reason, and with no forethought or planning, I recognize your state of hostilities with Mongoose. However, I find your post lacking on the important matters of Planet Bob.  Not propaganda that I can't afford because my nation is small and defenseless.  The real issues of the day are the oppression and likely imprisonment of Franz Ferdinand.  And so I shall set aside for this moment all my embracing of neutrality and my peacenik nature, and make this solemn oath.  I will not rest until we can all unite with one standard greeting.  Free Franz.

 

 

You have a very odd way of going about this. 

 

Its unconventional I'll give you that. 

Edited by Lucius Optimus
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Official Statement by Haven

 

We fully support Cobra in their efforts to protect their and our allies Ordo Cyberneticus. We also support their counterattack on the aggressors Mongoose.

We will also provide full military assistance and as of now declare a state of hostilities against Mongoose and King Neptune's Bar.

Edited by Todor Jivkov
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3 hours ago, Banned said:

Mongoose releases the following statement:

 

The following statement is a statement by Banned, and in no way necessarily represents the views of Mongoose.

 

I see your declaration of war, and your challenge that I, in no uncertain terms, hit you with my best shot.  In response to this, and for no other reason, and with no forethought or planning, I recognize your state of hostilities with Mongoose. However, I find your post lacking on the important matters of Planet Bob.  Not propaganda that I can't afford because my nation is small and defenseless.  The real issues of the day are the oppression and likely imprisonment of Franz Ferdinand.  And so I shall set aside for this moment all my embracing of neutrality and my peacenik nature, and make this solemn oath.  I will not rest until we can all unite with one standard greeting.  Free Franz.

 

 

 

Dude, how high are you?

 

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28 minutes ago, Johnny Apocalypse said:

 

Dude, how high are you?

 


Not near as high as that incompetent moron who declared back at DBDC after all your grandstanding, pardon me, would like my soapbox back.

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3 hours ago, Todor Jivkov said:

Official Statement by Haven

 

We fully support Cobra in their efforts to protect their and our allies Ordo Cyberneticus. We also support their counterattack on the aggressors Mongoose.

We will also provide full military assistance and as of now declare a state of hostilities against Mongoose and King Neptune's Bar.

 

Keep sending more alliances to write war declarations on Mongoose for the 1 nation you can hit please.  This is hilarious.

Edited by Banned
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24 minutes ago, Banned said:

 

Keep sending more alliances to write war declarations on Mongoose for the 1 nation you can hit please.  This is hilarious.

 

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We don't drink nearly enough blood from the skulls of our enemies these days.

Mongoose would have more members, I would imagine, if it were not composed of a single rogue who got caught launching spy ops and rage quit rather than reach out first, or a stalker with a bruised ego.

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3 hours ago, General Kanabis said:

We don't drink nearly enough blood from the skulls of our enemies these days.

 

It is known that I have a deliciously large skull.  Added bonus: you already have a cleanly declared war on me.  So I guess what I'm saying is: come and get it.

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