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Josephy Kony

A righteous declaration of war!

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I, Joseph Kony, Supreme Leader of the Lord's Resistance Army, and the one true ruler of the Congo, Uganda, and others, hereby declare war on the Republic of Idaho!  gold1218, I will make the world aware of your transgressions.

 

After multiple generous offers of foreign aid and trade negotiations, this loathsome country has refused to engage in any form of diplomacy.  This is unacceptable behavior for any nation.  They were warned of the consequences of ignoring our generous offer of marble and water, and now they will be punished.  Even now, loyal soldiers of the LRA are destroying the appalling infrastructure and heathenous defenders of Idaho.  A total accounting of the damage follows:

 

4 tech DESTROYED

4 tech SEIZED

45 infrastructure DESTROYED

512 HEATHENS SLAUGHTERED

$200,000+ SEIZED

 

It is important that we SEIZE these resources from those who would use it for blasphemous purposes.  The LRA suffered NO LOSSES during the righteous campaign.

 

Our terms are as follows:

We demand exports of cattle and fish.  

 

A formal log of diplomatic cables will be maintained here, for all the world to see.  We are a transparent democracy, and carry ourselves as such:

 

 

Quote

 

To: gold1218    From: Josephy Kony    Date: 6/23/2018 11:44:49 AM

Subject: Accept trade, or face war

 

Message: We have been very patient waiting for your trade approval. If you do not give us your resources freely, we shall take them by force. You have 3 days to accept this trade offer or face the consequences!
 

 

 

To: gold1218    From: Josephy Kony    Date: 6/23/2018 3:25:35 PM

Subject: War Declared!

 

Message: War has been declared on you by Josephy Kony for the following reason: Trade dispute

You may access your War & Battles screen to view and manage this war. The pre-existing trade between your two nations has been automatically canceled.

 

 

To: Josephy Kony    From: gold1218    Date: 6/23/2018 3:37:48 PM

Subject: ???

 

Message: You realize that I have an entire alliance behind me right?
 

To: gold1218    From: Josephy Kony    Date: 6/23/2018 3:44:42 PM

Subject: RE: ???

 

Message: I am willing to accept peace. My only terms are a permanent trade agreement between our 2 nations. I will even restore what I have seized in battle.
 

To: Josephy Kony    From: gold1218    Date: 6/23/2018 3:46:43 PM

Subject: RE: ???

 

Message: Lol oh no, there's no going back from this. Your nation will be destroyed
 

To: gold1218    From: Josephy Kony    Date: 6/23/2018 3:54:28 PM

Subject: RE: ???

 

Message: We will continue our righteous defense as long as your war mongering sensibilities necessitate it. When you are ready to see peace as the way forward, for both our nations, we can both prosper. I am offering you the best possible deal right now.

 

 

 

 

Edited by Josephy Kony

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Even now, our intrepid commandant, Nixman Oryanga, has issued me this report from the front:

 

Quote

We have initiated the invasion of this disgusting country, Idaho, as per the Lord's will.  We have begun converting entire tribes in the name of Jesus.   We have seized and searched many vehicles and technologies.  The infrastructure was regarded as an eyesore by the men and quickly levelled.  The cowardly blasphemers ran in hordes, but we mowed them down before they could spread their heresy to other lands.  Our tanks stormed the border areas, causing mass chaos and confusion among the local populations.  A vast number of different faiths and houses of idolatry were encountered.  These devious structures were also considered eyesores, and appropriately levelled in accordance with the desires of the Lord.   We have suffered no losses and are already preparing tomorrow's offensive.  The bombers reported back with great success.  The missileers reported back with great success.  We are going to be continuing the purification of this land until their leader, gold1218, sees the one true faith.

 

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Gloating about raiding an NPO applicant isn't an entirely smart thing to do but you seem to be having fun so knock yourself out.

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This is a concern between two sovereign nations... I can apply to join the NATO, but it doesn't mean the NATO wants me.  If there is going to be other military backing involved, we are not prepared to face a larger force.  We are not the irrational ones... WE are the forces of PEACE, and we have an offer on the table.

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You raid a nation on our Alliance Affiliation, presume to extort a trade deal from him, and expect no retaliation?

 

You must be new here. Allow Pacifica to educate you.

 

I'd advise you surrender to my Lieutenant if you don't want rolled.

 

Regards,

 

DeathAdder

Imperial Officer

NPO Military Affairs

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The Congo is not prepared to fight hundreds of nations at once.  We accept this offer for peace.  However, we must denounce these unfair sanctions... it is cruel to inflict such economic measures on a nation.  It is the innocent who suffer.  We have the finest marble and water to offer... we are seeking trade deals, not destructive wars!

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14 minutes ago, Josephy Kony said:

The Congo is not prepared to fight hundreds of nations at once.  We accept this offer for peace.  However, we must denounce these unfair sanctions... it is cruel to inflict such economic measures on a nation.  It is the innocent who suffer.  We have the finest marble and water to offer... we are seeking trade deals, not destructive wars!

 

Then perhaps you should apply to join an Alliance like a logical person would do, instead of attacking it and declaring a one-man war on them.

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40 minutes ago, Josephy Kony said:

The Congo is not prepared to fight hundreds of nations at once.  We accept this offer for peace.  However, we must denounce these unfair sanctions... it is cruel to inflict such economic measures on a nation.  It is the innocent who suffer.  We have the finest marble and water to offer... we are seeking trade deals, not destructive wars!

Listen to me yammy!!!

Quote

To: Josephy Kony    From: stonewall14    Date: 6/23/2018 6:50:44 PM

Subject: cease fire

 

Message: You have attacked a New Pacific Order nation and you will cease and desist at once and send peace. We can and will wipe your seed from the planet if you continue aggression against the Order.

stonewall14
NPO Military Command

 

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This is great. I am in full support of attacking any nation that refuses any trades!

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Oh boy....of all the alliances to hit. RIP

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The eyesores of the country were appalling to the Lord's sensibilities, but we have relented.  We are not prepared to face hundreds of nations.  Our foreign affairs minister was unaware that applicants to this grouping of nations were entitled to military privileges.  That individual was executed, as befits his egregious oversight.  We are now prepared for peace, on the terms of the New Pacific Order.  Hopefully everyone understands this was a minor trade dispute, we are a simple, poor people, only looking for resources to help our struggling population.  We must think of the children in times like these.

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This guy is one of those people isn’t he? This is going to be fun. Continue to stand for your beliefs in the future. 

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If by one of those people you mean a simple, peaceful but poor people then yes.  We are only looking for peace in these times.

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1 hour ago, Josephy Kony said:

If by one of those people you mean a simple, peaceful but poor people then yes.  We are only looking for peace in these times.

Peace Be Upon You....Go and Sin against the Order no more! Though your sins were scarlet like the NPO banner, they are now pure as snow...:popcorn:

 

 

 

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Josephey Kony,

 

Free advice, in a world of nations we are but small states. Join an alliance and become part of something bigger than the some of its parts.

 

Sincerely,

 

Joseph M. Black.

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To be fair, it's a better reason for war than many that I have seen. Good on Pacifica for letting him go once he realized his mistake though.

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