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Lord of Darkness

Imperial Decree from the New [s]Pacific[/s] Pony Order

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Imperial Decree from the New Pacific Pony Order

 

Francograd, Sunday April 1st, 2018

 

All was quiet across the city of Francograd in the wee hours of the morning. Roquentin was comfortably curled up in a nest of lettuce and carrots. Pansy snuggled with his favorite sheep. Gandypoodle lay slumbering in his luxurious pink doghouse located in the courtyard of Fort Francograd. Above Imperial Emperor gazed out the window of his living quarters, for he was slow to do anything - let alone fall asleep (with, of course, the exception of being prone to crash at random times throughout the day). He slowly pondered the day's events and reminisced in days long gone, remembering a play an adoring fan once wrote about him during his time as General of the Army of the Pacific.

 

He was startled out of his reverie when he thought he glimpsed the sight of rainbow glitter and explosions coming from the direction of the Pacifican Research and Development facility. Rubbing his eyes in confusion he took a few moments to blink before looking back out again. He had spent a long day parsing data and thought surely his eyes were playing tricks on him. Moments later sirens began to blare in the distance, followed by much closer.

 

Soon every screen in Francograd began flashing a horrifying rainbow colored message for all the roused Pacificans to read. The message read:

 

CONTAINMENT BREACH! FOR YOU OWN SAFETY SEEK IMMEDIATE SHELTER! THIS IS NOT A DRILL.

 

TUNE INTO THE PACIFIC NEWS NETWORK FOR REGULAR UPDATES ON THIS DEVELOPING SITUATION.

 

The sound of explosions and rainbow flashes in the distance grew ever brighter and the sound of horrified screams drifted over. As the great fortress came to life IE "hurried" to the briefing room for more information. Upon arriving half an hour later he heard the latest updates from DeathAdder. "Earlier tonight a horde of ponies held within the vaults below our Research and Development compound escaped. We kept them locked up for Comrade Bart to conduct experiments for advanced weaponry for use against our enemies." MariMassa chimed in, "we believe that long time advocate for Pony Rights, Bobogoobo, helped orchestrate this insurrection with the assistance of jgolla and his fellow huggers."

 

As the hours went on, the ponies continued to wreck untold havoc despite the best efforts of Pacifican security forces...

 


Comrade Red has graciously volunteered her services in combating the pony menace. I do hereby appoint Red as Emperor of the New Pony Order. She has a great love for all things equestrian and will see that both ponies and pony sympathizers are dealt with in the appropriate manner.

 

o/ Red

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I graciously accept this appointment.  As my first act of office I hereby abolish the ranks of Regent and Imperial Officers.  In their place I will elevate an elite group of Pacificans as Blackadders, henceforth tasked with the duty to seek out and remove all ponies, hugglers, and other such vermin from the ranks of the New Pony Order. 

My your gods have mercy on your souls.

Red

Emperor

Primary Color

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i have no idea if i'm even supposed to like things at this point but ok

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The Neutral Pacific Order will crush the Pony scum :ph34r:

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Old Guard will delay our impending zerg rush until this all works itself out and the ship Pacifica is righted.

 

/thoughts and prayers

//mercy and souls.

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Oh noes the horrahz!!! Cool story brochachos...o/ New Pony Order :wub:

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Was expecting an April 1st joke, pleasantly surprised by this excellent report of the NPO's current situation.

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