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Purple Reign


Jorost
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Dearly Beloved,
 
We are gathered here today to get through this thing called life. Electric word, life. It means forever and that’s a mighty long time. But I’m here to tell you there’s something else…

The World of Bob.
 
Invicta was born into this world nearly a decade ago as a Purple alliance. Now, after a long sojourn on Red, Invicta is coming home.
 
Now for the official stuff:
 
Acting in my capacity as Lord Protector of Invicta, and with the advice and consent of my Government, led by our esteemed President Kiwi, I do hereby and forthwith declare Invicta to be a Purple alliance. All Invicta nations are instructed to switch their trading sphere to Purple at the earliest opportunity.
 
In taking this action, I relinquish my seat in the Red Senate, which I have held for six years. If the people of the Purple sphere see fit to elect me their senator, I will be honored to serve in that capacity again. I would point out that the décor in my office was always purple because of our flag. Also I am prepared to dole out favors, both political and sexual (name a Government member and a price), in pursuit of this goal. But I digress.
 
In our hearts Invicta has always been Purple. Our flag has always been purple. Purple blood circulates in our veins. We cry purple tears. We pee purple… well, you get it. It’s actually kind of gross. I keep saying we should call a doctor but apparently our health insurance doesn’t cover it. But I digress.

 

Personally, I am very excited to be back on Purple. It feels like coming home. Plus I like the color purple better than red. It always felt vaguely communistic over there. Now, with everything purple, it feels vaguely gay.
 
And that feels like home.

 

Given under our hand and seal, this 22nd day of April, 2016,

 

/s/ Jorost of the Crownlands, Lord Protector of Invicta

Edited by Jorost
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5 minutes ago, Franz Ferdinand said:

So... you are moving to Red Team, right?

 

No, see, this is where I was afraid people might get confused. It's not entirely clear, but in fact we are moving to Orange.

 

I mean Purple. Purple.

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