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Sheep Inc.  Declaration of Presence

 

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Introduction (The Story So Far)

 

Sheep Inc. would like to take this opportunity to announce its declaration of presence i.e. we're here.  Hello.  Although we’re a seasoned alliance and celebrate our one-week anniversary today, we feel that we’ve already come so far without even announcing our presence to the world.  As Michael Jordan once said,"You must be the change you want to see in the world."  With that in mind, we aspired and we've already reached great heights.  Here's a brief sample of what we're talking about:

 

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Hey, is that Enron?  Haha.  Good one.  All we really know is, we had a pretty successful first week.  I'd like to take this opportunity to thank all of those who made it happen.  Unfortunately, stocks have since dwindled, and we now reside at 201.  Quality over quantity, right?  Right.  Nevertheless, we're proud of our achievement and we remain unperturbed by this minor setback.  Keep at it, boys!

 

 

Charter

 

Now, moving onto the official business, here's a charter thing that we drew up earlier.  Hey, you cool kids at the back, pay attention!

 

Preamble

The Nations of Sheep Inc. in their commitment to the Company and encouraged with the will to renew and strengthen the existing share price, in good times and bad, to serve the shareholder inward and outward and to promote progress and growth, have adopted this Charter.

 

Article I. - The Company

The Independent Republic of Orange Nations is a burgeoning company. As such it is established and guided by the principles of oligarchy.

 

Article II. - Profits and the Board of Directors

The profitability of the Company is vested with the Board of Directors-as-a-whole. The Board of Directors must, in its exercise to improve profits, preserve and protect the honour, integrity, stability and the well being of the Company with any and all means at its disposal.

 

The Board of Directors-as-a-whole has absolute power over the affairs of the Company, but may at any time and at its discretion delegate certain of these powers and responsibilities.

 

The Board of Directors’ decisions are made by an absolute majority vote, based on the one seat one vote principle. In case of a tie, the CEO of Sheep Inc. casts the deciding vote.

 

Once appointed to the Board of Directors, the individual Board members serve the Company indefinitely or until such time as they tender their resignation.

 

A Sheep Inc. employee is accountable to the Board of Directors-as-a-whole and can be removed forcefully by obtaining a majority vote from the body should the member be deemed to be underperforming in his duties.

 

Article III. - Membership

A nation that has applied to join the Company, shall pledge its loyalty and devotion to the Company and to the CEO by submitting a heavy brown envelope with its application.

 

Member nations accept that membership in the Company is incompatible with membership of any other business, and as such forsake all other alliances.

 

Member nations are bound by an oath of confidentiality and may not reveal internal or confidential information regarding the Company to any party outside of the Company. This oath remains in effect even after the member nation ceases to be a member of the Company and is effective from the moment its ruler is granted membership.

 

Article IV. - Violations

Any member nation found to be in violation of this Charter, the Sheep Inc. Pledge, Rules of War, any other law of the Company or the spirit inherent therein shall be subject to punitive actions decided on by the Board of Directors at its discretion.

 

Article V. - Charter Changes

Changes to the present Charter are subject to the review and at least a 2/3 majority approval of the Board of Directors.

 

 

Testimonials

 

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A glowing testimonial from a man who knows all about life at the top, but, rest easy, Vlad.  We're just here for the investors.  Anyway, we hosted a cocktail party at the farm on our opening day and we invited some of the world's leaders, both past and present.  I used it as an opportunity to get a few words from some of them about Sheep Inc.  Here they are:

 

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“Truth be told, my retirement was prompted by the birth of this new star aka Sheep Inc.  The

sheer, raw, unadulterated potential made me realise that I needed to step aside and

let somebody else keep pace with this rising superpower.” - Dajobo

 

Some kind words from over at the NpO.  Thanks Daj.  Let’s carry on our journey…

 

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“Some of the boys came to me and handed in their resignations to make way

for their departure to Sheep Inc.  Luckily, Sheep Inc. was gracious enough

to sign a non-stealing-members pact.  Thanks to them.” - Cuba

 

Don’t mention it, Cuba.

 

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“The wheel, sliced bread... sheep-themed alliances?

I think we just made the third great leap.” - Chimaera

 

Glad I don't blush!

 

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"Deal to supply the winter coats for Pacifica’s next invasion of Polaris?” - Letum

 

Hmmm.  Maybe.  Have your people call my people.

 

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“Wait, did you steal and edit our cha…” - The Warrior

 

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Well, that about wraps up this little announcement.  I have an appointment  You know how business is. Time is money, money is paper, paper is trees, etc.  You've been great.  Thanks for your time.

 

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Article I. - The Company

The Independent Republic of Orange Nations is a burgeoning company. As such it is established and guided by the principles of oligarchy.

Indeed. I enjoy your charter, good sir.

 

It's also good to know that photoshop is not a lost art. Good show.

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