2013 Election Special: Interview with NPA candidate, Leonid Kuchma

[President Costava]

ARSTOTZKA STATE TV ANCHORMAN: Good evening and welcome to the 2013 Election Special. I'm joined now by candidate Prime Minister Leonid Kuchma, the Leader of the National Party of Arstotzka, thank you very much for being with us. Hasn't Arstotzka actually called off something of an incredible job. For the first time we Arstotzkans have the right to freely express ourself and tomorrow, thousands of free citizens will cast their vote into the ballots. It seems like we are coming to an agreed position, over what to do about this country. Is this all we need to do to prosper and deserve a spot around the table of the free democratic nations of the world?

 

LEONID KUCHMA: Not at all, no. This is just the first step. The original plan of His Exellency, President Costava, was that the Arstotzka would act as one. But this is not what the Democratic Union of Arstotzka wants. Voting for the left wing coalition of former bureaucrats of the thankfully defunct oppressive communist regime would throw the power into the hands of the people who oppressed us for almost 60 years, and this is exactly what we, the National Party of Arstotzka, want to prevent. And of course arstotzkans will say: we don't want that, we cut the ties with our past, now it's time to think of Arstotzka and its future. So what you've seen in fact is people, the bureaucrats of the Democratic Union of Arstotzka, acting in their own personal interest. So I think that somehow claiming that all we need is to have an election, and whoever the winner is things will automatically run smoothly, is completely, utterly wrong.

 

ARSTOTZKA STATE TV ANCHORMAN: But you know, okay, yes, there have been odd stresses and strains when it seemed like Arstotzka fell into a state of anarchy. But what you come up with at the end of it is an agreed plan to rebuild our country.

 

LEONID KUCHMA: Good, great, I'm happy. I don't just want Arstotzka to make the same mistakes over and over again, I'd like to see new faces in politics, new ideas, new mentality, meritocracy and, above all, equality. 

 

ARSTOTZKA STATE TV ANCHORMAN: So, better to embrace the system we have always opposed.

 

LEONID KUCHMA:  And give up the system we have always been forced to accept? Indeed. I don't hide the fact i despise communism for the crimes committed in its name on the people of Arstotzka for almost 60 years, and i don't hide the fact our political heritage is largely shaped by this past. However, we've not been part of the Soviet Union since 1991 and we recently elevated our status as independent and internationally recognized republic. We've had a bit more freedom of action, but maybe not as much as one thinks, and it was a disaster.

 

ARSTOTZKA STATE TV ANCHORMAN: But you were the sort of person who'd come on this programme in the past and say, look at Socialist Arstotzka: strong, independent country, able to govern its own affairs, outside the protection of the western world.

 

LEONID KUCHMA: I had a family back then, i still do, and if they are alive today is thanks to the way i camouflaged myself for my entire life as a humble servant of the regime, alive in the memories of men and women of my age and older.. and i am happy the memory is still alive, we can still make something good out of the horrible experience of our past.. we can truly become a democratic nation, free, just, rich. The point is, we're a potentially rich country. President Costava has done a great job and i am comitting myself to be democratically elected as Prime Minister to help him and enhance this democratic process. We will make this country a first world country, powerful, peaceful, and prosperous. Glory to Arstotzka.

 

ARSTOTZKA STATE TV ANCHORMAN: Okay. Mr Kuchma, thanks very much for being with us here on the 2013 Election special. Goodnight. Glory to Arstotzka.

Edited August 30, 2013 by President Costava