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[quote name='mpol777' timestamp='1323292174' post='2867674']
[center]
[img]http://www.grandbastard.reloadpress.com/fan.jpg[/img]
[size=5][font="Impact"]Federation of Armed Nations[/font][/size]
[/center]

[i]4 heavily armed men roll a large steel box covered in warning labels out onto the pressroom floor. One pulls the microphone from the podium and passes it through a small opening near the top to whomever... or whatever... is inside.[/i]

'Sup $%&@ers! I know it's been a while since I've been here before you, but as you can see they don't let me out amongst the unwashed masses any more. Totally undeserving mind you. I mean you eat one hooker and people get all weird for no reason.

Anyway, apparently there is a war on. I've been told there is much wailing and gnashing of teeth happening. Honestly I haven't bothered to read up, but I'm sure I can guess what's going on. Some alliance attacked another for whatever reason they thought would work. Some folks decided to side with the alliance that was attacked and some others with the one that did the attacking. All the while people trying to seem important shook their fists with righteous indignation towards 'the other side' for doing or not doing something or other. Sound about right? It should because that's been pretty much every war on Planet Bob.

Why is FAN at war? Why not? I mean can you really think of a reason not to be in a war right now? Saving all of your pixels to take your mom out for a hot date or something? Trust me. She's easy. You'll get laid without all of that infra.

We live in a world covered in graves. Global population is dwindling. Everything that can be done has been done. Nobody with any cajones and the resources to actually make the planet livable or interesting is still here. In other words, you're $%&@ed. So you might as well spend your last miserable days in this !@#$hole making someone else's life just as miserable. Or you could of course get in line and follow... umm what's his name... you know that guy that does all of the crazy !@#$ and makes Planet Bob awesome... oh yeah. I forgot. Those days are over.

Now is the point some whiny !@#$%*es are going to start thinking about complaining. "But mpol you're not doing anything to make the world better.". To that I say, "$%&@ off". I spent years pissing in other people's faces and causing enough mayhem to make the drama llama's head explode. At this point I simply enjoy the dying planet. Death doesn't phase me or FAN. We've died countless times. Nothing a shot of whiskey can't cure. That whole getting turned into zombies has been extremely handy.

You already know FAN will be the last standing on Planet Bob. So go out with a bang. You'll be forgotten along with the countless others that went before you, but at least for a split second you will have amounted to something. And for many of you that second is as much as you can hope for. It certainly beats just sitting there drooling on yourselves.

Well. I'm sure glad we had this talk. I can just feel the love. Until next time.

[i]mpol hands the microphone out of the box. As one of the guards grabs it he pulls his hand in. The guard screams and jerks his arm out minus a finger.[/i]

[img]http://www.grandbastard.reloadpress.com/officialfan.gif[/img]


Often replicated. Never duplicated. Gun Porn.
[img]http://www.grandbastard.reloadpress.com/upload/6383-DSCN0093.jpg[/img]
[/quote]
Legend!

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Was not here during VietFAN but it must have done a number on FAN’s psychic. FAN’s desire to destroy NPO is reminiscent to Capt Ahab’s quest to kill Moby Dick.

If FAN is bent on this path than that is certainly your right to do so but as I recall it did not turn out so well for Captain Ahab and his crew.

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[quote name='Daimos' timestamp='1323366208' post='2869326']
Was not here during VietFAN but it must have done a number on FAN’s psychic. FAN’s desire to destroy NPO is reminiscent to Capt Ahab’s quest to kill Moby Dick.

If FAN is bent on this path than that is certainly your right to do so but as I recall it did not turn out so well for Captain Ahab and his crew.
[/quote]

Go back and read it again. We can't destroy npo anymore than they could us. We can however break their toys

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[quote name='Daimos' timestamp='1323366208' post='2869326']
Was not here during VietFAN but it must have done a number on FAN's psychic. FAN's desire to destroy NPO is reminiscent to Capt Ahab's quest to kill Moby Dick.

If FAN is bent on this path than that is certainly your right to do so but as I recall it did not turn out so well for Captain Ahab and his crew.
[/quote]

"That inscrutable thing is chiefly what I hate; and be the white whale agent, or be the white whale principle, I will wreak that hate upon him. Talk not to me of blasphemy, man; I'd strike the sun if it insulted me"

"Aye, aye! It was that accursed white whale that razeed me; made a poor pegging lubber of me for ever and a day!" Then tossing both arms, with measureless imprecations he shouted out: "Aye, aye! and I'll chase him round Good Hope, and round the Horn, and round the Norway Maelstrom, and round perdition's flames before I give him up. And this is what ye have shipped for, men! to chase that white whale on both sides of land, and over all sides of earth, till he spouts black blood and rolls fin out."

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[quote name='memoryproblems' timestamp='1323368011' post='2869353']
How's that working out for you this time around?
[/quote]

it's working out great.

I am not even attacking you or your other two meatshields that have attacked me because I am at war with NPO, not you.

I am enjoying your nukes though. they keep me warm.

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[quote name='GSPatton' timestamp='1323305195' post='2867954']
FAN isn't just about firearms, and pictures of firearms.
For instance, many of us are into cooking. Here's a picture of my Wolf Range.
[img]http://i63.photobucket.com/albums/h126/GSPattonWV/wolf.jpg[/img]
[/quote]

That is a glorious range. Did you put the backsplash in yourself?

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[quote name='Damon' timestamp='1323324377' post='2868691']
FAN+FARK is smaller than NPO in almost every conceivable catagory.
[/quote]

Every conceivable category except Strength (2 to 1 advantage), upper tier (4 to 1 advantage), tech (4 to 1 advantage) and nukes (50% advantage).



[quote] They are our Darth Vader. They are our Joker. They are our Green Goblin.[/quote]

You're welcome.

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The thing I love about FAN is that you know they are [b]never[/b] going to change. They will always be the same awesome alliance they were when they got here.

[quote name='Maelstrom Vortex' timestamp='1323370719' post='2869395']
FAN cannot be the last on Planet Bob.. as I've pledged to be here until Bob imploded. I guess we'll be on this rock together when it happens.

Here's to fiddling while Bob burns?
[/quote]
At this point I don't think anyone can claim to be as resilient as FAN, except maybe Polar. So yeah, I'm gonna put my bets on mpol.

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[quote name='Damon' timestamp='1323324377' post='2868691']
They are our Darth Vader. They are our Joker. They are our Green Goblin.[/quote]

Green Goblin seems out of place on that list. Try Lex Luther.

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[quote name='Stonewall Jaxon' timestamp='1323323428' post='2868636']
"You can't insult us for failing because we don't care if we fail."

Is that really the story now? BEcause it's pretty easy to see straight through.
[/quote]

To the audience at home, I would like to point out that Mr. Jaxon's little temper tantrum stems from bitterness. He was the only person in the history of FAN to be forcibly removed from its ranks and perma-banned on our forum. We did so when the fact he is a pathological liar came to light. He will refute this post, so I preemptively invite anyone to our forum to see our proof.

I'd like to give my sincere thank you to the few people in this thread who can see the forest for the trees.

Furthermore I implore everyone allied to NATO, TPF, or NPO to come out and play.

[b][i]Sweet lovely death I am waiting for your breath. Come sweet death, one last caress.[/i][/b]

Edited by SirSqueeboo
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I could not help but notice that several posters in this thread were upset with us adding gun porn to our posts. I have no issue with someone disliking guns. I have no issue with someone not wanting to own or carry a gun. What I do find puzzling is why someone that doesn't like and wants to complain about guns would wander into a FAN thread to begin with. Sounds pretty masochistic to me as FAN is not a new kid on the block so you knew what you would see in here. Anyway, no offense.

[img]http://fangamers.net/imagehosting/414ba7b4fe8ffb6.jpg[/img]
[img]http://fangamers.net/imagehosting/414bf9ded6a9a9f.jpg[/img]
[img]http://fangamers.net/imagehosting/414c6b074431e21.jpg[/img]
[img]http://fangamers.net/imagehosting/414c77d738c66c1.jpg[/img]

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[quote name='Doitzel' timestamp='1323372135' post='2869418']
The thing I love about FAN is that you know they are [b]never[/b] going to change. They will always be the same awesome alliance they were when they got here.

At this point I don't think anyone can claim to be as resilient as FAN, except maybe Polar. So yeah, I'm gonna put my bets on mpol.
[/quote]

Your money is safe good sir.

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[quote name='SirSqueeboo' timestamp='1323304637' post='2867939']
Sorry, but it's been TPF who has been claiming we're hiding in peace mode. Quoting the wrong person is as easy as a typo. Good try though.
[/quote]

You are not hiding in peace mode. You are turtling nicely.

I can vouch for you ;)

Edited by Daeryon
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[quote name='memoryproblems' timestamp='1323344699' post='2869009']
Why don't you get it right and call us what we are.

We aren't lackeys, we're meatshields.
[/quote]

I prefer the term "expendables".

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[quote name='SirSqueeboo' timestamp='1323374076' post='2869464']
To the audience at home, I would like to point out that Mr. Jaxon's little temper tantrum stems from bitterness. He was the only person in the history of FAN to be forcibly removed from its ranks and perma-banned on our forum. We did so when the fact he is a pathological liar came to light. He will refute this post, so I preemptively invite anyone to our forum to see our proof.
[/quote]

Deny? You must not know me that well. However, as one little point, I'd like to state that I am not bitter, as evidenced by when I went to your forum and engaged in light conversation for several days as a sign of reconciliation, then Keenedge's grudge against me for events I believe occurred over a year prior came to light. My dissenting comments in this thread come only from your condescending attitude toward this community as a whole, in which you are, like it or not, a participant.

And I won't say that I have not been a pathological liar in the past, and neither can your entire alliance, as we're both guilty of spying, and spying requires a series of pathological lies. However, I have seen the light and have not told a lie in CN in quite a long time. I've also never held long-term grudges; to me they are foolishly childish and harmful to myself, and to hold one shows that you really do care too much ;) . I made it clear on your private forum, and I'll make it clear here: I hold no grudge. I joined your alliance because I liked your style, and naturally I still do, and I enjoyed my time with the colorful figures of FAN. It wasn't a group I belonged in, but I've enjoyed watching you continue to resiliently exist, and I wish for you a bright future. You probably wish something much different for me, but that's something I'll accept because I don't like to dwell on bygones I can never fix.


Happy trails, my friends

[quote]Just wanted to drop by and say hi.[/quote]

For the record, I still !@#$@#$ love this guy

Edited by Stonewall Jaxon
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[quote name='SirNightcrawler' timestamp='1323370573' post='2869393']
it's working out great.

I am not even attacking you or your other two meatshields that have attacked me because I am at war with NPO, not you.

I am enjoying your nukes though. they keep me warm.
[/quote]


You tried to attack me, failed epically at it. Then quit. One thing I can't figure out for the life of me...you appear to be re-buying your navy? My lord man, you barely have enough war chest to last out the week re-buying planes. You are going to be a bill locked crater if this thing goes more than 3 weeks.

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[quote name='Doitzel' timestamp='1323372135' post='2869418']
The thing I love about FAN is that you know they are [b]never[/b] going to change. They will always be the same awesome alliance they were when they got here.


At this point I don't think anyone can claim to be as resilient as FAN, except maybe Polar. So yeah, I'm gonna put my bets on mpol.
[/quote]

I don't like characters that don't change. They're uninteresting and static. Characters that are dynamic tend to make the story more enjoyable.

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[quote name='Jrenster' timestamp='1323379824' post='2869585']
I don't like characters that don't change. They're uninteresting and static. Characters that are dynamic tend to make the story more enjoyable.
[/quote]

May I suggest you try a different thread? :P

[img]http://fangamers.net/imagehosting/414d77bd75c4b5a.jpg[/img]
[img]http://fangamers.net/imagehosting/414de1b588dd0de.jpg[/img]

Edited by Princess Doomee
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[quote name='Princess Doomee' timestamp='1323380182' post='2869591']
May I suggest you try a different thread? :P

[img]http://fangamers.net/imagehosting/414d77bd75c4b5a.jpg[/img]
[img]http://fangamers.net/imagehosting/414de1b588dd0de.jpg[/img]
[/quote]

Nah, I'm in the right one. I was responding to his opinion that FAN and Polar are cool people because they stand by a certain set of characteristics and are hard to move from those characteristics. My retort was that that just makes for a boring alliance. Alliances that don't learn new things, and never budge from their "principles" does not necessarily make them great.

Also is that a G3 on the end? I'm pretty !@#$%* with knowing about guns and stuff, so apologies if I'm wrong.

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