Captain Enema Posted November 20, 2011 Report Share Posted November 20, 2011 [b]The United Republic of Akdeniz[/b] Thousand and thousands and thousands and thousands of holiday goers descend upon The United Republic of Akdeniz like a plague of locusts. Despite any and all efforts by the military to fend them off they are swarmed under by the voracious appetites of the holiday goers. The thirst for porn, cheap beer, bargain accommodations leaves them in a violent and blood thirsty mood. Upon being turned back at the airport the horde grows rapidly unruly and they descend upon the customs officials with sheer numbers and cricket bats. They are also using vinyl records as body armor and long sausages as their back up weapons. Within minutes the airport is a bloody and violent shambles of drunken football hooligans and prostitutes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
King Timmy Posted November 20, 2011 Report Share Posted November 20, 2011 Ear plugs were handed out to all members of staff and law enforcement at the airports. Cher songs were then played on repeat at excessive volume levels to drive back the invading holiday makers. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Enema Posted November 20, 2011 Author Report Share Posted November 20, 2011 The siren song of Cher only makes the crowd grow stronger. The holiday revelers swarm the police barricades an begin violating the sheep as rapidly as they can. What more can be expected from the Scots? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
King Timmy Posted November 20, 2011 Report Share Posted November 20, 2011 A memorial to William Wallace was placed in the concourse of each airport to calm the Scots down with an equally patriotic song on the bagpipes being played in the background. Most Scots would be moved to tears within seconds. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Enema Posted November 20, 2011 Author Report Share Posted November 20, 2011 The Scots being the byproduct of English Imperialism and terrible English School System have long since forgotten who William Wallace is. The moving chords serve only to remind them of the opening strains of the Arsenal Football Club's song. This has the exact opposite effect on them as they begin ripping off their shirts to proudly display their Glasgow Ranger's colors as they begin making petrol bombs and hurling them at buses full of nuns, orphans, small children, and handicapped people. They also are seen urinating on the Beattle's Abby Way Discography collection whilst loudly screaming, "Down with Liverpool!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
King Timmy Posted November 20, 2011 Report Share Posted November 20, 2011 Just then, Blarfnarf, an alien from a galaxy far far away noticed all the commotion and teleported the invaders into space where they would all die due to lack of alcohol. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Enema Posted November 20, 2011 Author Report Share Posted November 20, 2011 (edited) Radiation in the upper atmosphere interrupts with the alien's transportation beams and dumps them all near the URA's largest liquor store. While they are somewhat surprised, they soon begin queuing up like the British are wont to do wherever they are in the world to get their discounts on gin and other spirits. Local shop owners take advantage of the influx by selling them day old kebabs at a severely marked up price. Edited November 20, 2011 by Tidy Bowl Man Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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