Dispatch to the Athenian Federation

[Triyun]

[b]Dear Esteemed Pretty Boy of the Athenian Federation Emperor Valerio Bourbon,[/b]

It appears that you have recently acquired Terror Mountain from the Artemis Corporation. It is my understanding that you are building a monument to Emperor Triyun II. While the Emperor Triyun II has a mixed legacy, his glorious actions in uniting China are quite admirable. Therefore we would like to request a purchase of the facility around the monument to open the 'Emperor Triyun II Learning Center for Dictators Who Can't Conquer Well and Want to Learn to Do Other Stuff Too.'.

We envision this being a center where future despots from across the Earth can come and learn from a man who did so much to improve Earth, from the introduction of hegemonic blocs, to the terrorizing of small countries, and so forth. His innovations continue to guide many today, and bring great angst upon those who suck. We feel this would be a fitting tribute to him.

[b][center]Signed:[/center][/b]

Jia, August Imperator of the United Federation of the East and General Ruiner of Stuff

[b]P.S.[/b]: If you say no, I'll see that your in laws visit you till you cry out for mercy and kowtow before me.

[Centurius]

[b]Dear Esteemed Desperate Housewive of the United Federation of the East August Imperator Jia[/b]

You would be correct on all counts and it would be a great idea to teach the future generation how to extort small countries and burn larger ones so they become small. You have permission to create this center. Don't leave too many blood stains please, we like white snow and well you probably know how to clean up anyway.

[b][center]Signed:[/center][/b]

Valerio Moretti of Bourbon, Emperor of the Western Athenian Federation, General Kicker of Ass.

[b]P.S.:[/b] I do have Razor Special Operations for a reason. They're good vatican assassins.