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Osmanli Republic Born Today

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Today the Osmanli Republic has approved a new constitution and announces its birth to the world.

Article One: This Nation is an Islamist Nation, Not an Islamic Nation

1. While the Quran provides the basic foundation of our laws, we also recognize it was written in an era of low technology and was primarily designed to keep law and order in a time when Video Surveillance, DNA Testing, Wiretaps, ect did not exist.

2. The Government will not legislate morals as that is between you and Allah when you depart this mortal realm, however, if they affect society's safety that effect is legislated. So for example you can drink wine if you wish, just don't drink and drive, and Allah will discuss this moral failing with you when you leave your mortal shell behind.

Article Two: This Government shall be a Federal Government

1. The Commissar of the Government is Elected by the People for Life and can be recalled only by the Legislature by a two-thirds vote prompting new elections within 50 days. The Commissar is the Chief Executive of the Nation and enforces all laws and commands the Military. He may appoint Judges and Officers, but the Senate must approve them.

2. The Legislature shall consist of two houses. The House of Representatives whose number shall be 100 and they shall be elected proportionally by the people by party every four years. The Senate shall consist one representative from each state and they are appointed by the state Governor to represent the state itself and can be replaced by the Governor at anytime. The Legislature Shall collectively be known as Progress and make all laws subject to veto or signing by the Commissar, set all weights and measures, coin money, and determines the budget.

3. The Supreme Court is the Guardian of the Constitution and serve for Life once confirmed.

4. The Voting Age is 14 years of age, as this also age one can legally work outside of paper routes and agriculture and thus be taxed on their wages.

Article Three: The National Religion is Islam, but you are not required to attend the Mosque or follow the Spirit of Allah's Laws, but beware, Allah is watching and when you depart this mortal plane, he will judge you accordingly and don't say you weren't warned in the Afterlife, it won't fly especially if you are Atheist and spent your entire life going out of your way to mock the faithful and Allah.

Article Four: Universal Healthcare, Education, and Insurance are the Law of this land. Government pays for all this through your taxes.

Article Five: Capitalism is nonsense and has just as many historical failures as Communism. Government Infrastructure is what drives the economy and the Government has every interest in ensuring the economy runs smoothly by building Infrastructure and passing rules and regulation regarding business operations.

Article Six: Treason is bribing a Public Official, the attempt to overthrow a just government or spying on the State on the behalf of another State. Evidence must be substantial to justify the conviction and Allah is the final Authority for appeal, those wrongly convicted will be spared by Allah when they depart this mortal plane after execution. No corruption of blood is permissible upon conviction or forfeitures except for the life attainted.

Article Seven: Slavery is abolished for all time.

Article Eight: No cruel and unusual punishment may be inflicted and only treason is punishable by death.

Article Nine: All citizens have a right to a Trial by Jury and their defense is paid for by the state and they may compel witnesses to testify on their own behalf and may appeal on the facts as well as law.

Article Ten: All citizens and legal residents have a right to a minimum standard of living and the Government is committed to full employment of those who can work and if necessary will find you something to do, commensurate with your skills and impediments, to earn your food and shelter.

Article Eleven: No Nobility Titles will ever be issued by the state.

Article Twelve: All confessions must be done in Open Court in full view of the press and public in order to be considered legitimate. Confessions not made in such a manner are not permissible as evidence in Court.

Article Thirteen: All people have the right to Free Speech, Assembly, and to worship as they please. Remember though, Allah sees all and knows all and we all must answer to him when we depart this Mortal Plane of Existence.

Article Fourteen: The State and the people reserves the right to amend this Constitution as needed so don't take this as Holy Writ for crying out loud.


Revelers Celebrate the New Nation

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