Schattenmann Posted June 7, 2011 Report Share Posted June 7, 2011 Since we've probably reached a sort of event horizon in terms of playership and will probably be seeing more and more nuke rogues as old-timers not content with fighting the same wars for the past 4 years find the need to fight the same war one more time by nuking other people too old and inactive for any observer to remember or know why he's being rogued, and since Dahl's post is not actually a guide and a [url="http://z15.invisionfree.com/Cyber_Nations/index.php?showtopic=63495&st=0"]actual guide already exists[/url], I give you Diskord's (drumroll please) [center] [b][size="6"]Nuke Rogueing for Dummies[/size] [size="4"]A 12-step program[/size][/b] [/center] Okay, so all you nuclear rogues out there are probably lacking a bit of grey matter to begin with... but in the interest of education I decided to write a little primer on HOW to be a nuclear rogue. This is actually a serious post, why I am writing a tip guide for nuclear rogues I don't know... but it sounded like a fun thought project for the morning to think how I would go rogue after seeing so many others try and end up failing. (PS, it's really 13 steps, I had to add a step 0, but only because I have seen people try and go rogue with 2 nukes... thats not nuclear roguery... thats just retarded). Step 0: Make sure you have a healthy cache of nukes, chances are a nuke rogue won't be able to purchase nukes during his roguery except for maybe on day 1 (and even then it is unlikely) so don't enter into being a nuke rogue expecting to buy the nukes you are going to use, that is just a phail idea. Stock up and be prepared. Step 1: Declare on your three targets you want before doing ANYTHING else. I has seen a few nuke rogues try and attack 1 individual, do all their ground attacks, cm's, etc and before they can even get to their 2nd target they are in anarchy. Thats what we call a phail. So make sure you declare on the 3 targets you want before you do anything. Step 2: Buy a lot of soldiers and deploy them all (go ahead and anarchy yourself now, but get those troops AWAY from home), don't actually do anything with them yet but we need to do things in proper order here. Step 3: If you don't have Sats, now is the time to sell some improvements and swap them out for Sat's. Don't worry about MD's but try and get 5 Sats for maximum asshatery. Step 4: Before you even do any attacks, start selling crap, and I mean literally you are selling everything here. Sell all your land, sell all your infra, sell all your improvements (except for the Sats). You are trashing your nation anyway. There is nothing more infuriating to an opponent that wanting to ZI you, only to find out that you have already ZI'd yourself. This serves 2 purpose, 1 it reduces your bills to practically nothing so you can stay out of bill lock and 2 creates a bit more extra "capital" for you to continue your roguery. Step 5: Now do your first attacks. Make sure all your attacks are cautious attacks. Your nukes will do the anarchying for you, so no point in risking your soldiers (these are the only ones you will get, since you have no infrastructure now, so use them wisely). Also send you CM's over, cause everyone loves a good missile barage. Step 6: Send funny and humerous PM's to taunt your opponents, don't send crap like "DIE IN A FIRE!" or "I'M GONNA F$#$ YOU UP!" cause thats just lame... instead go find some awesome 80's music video's on youtube and send links to them in pm's. If you are having fun that will only annoy your victims more... Step 7: 24 hours have passed, now drop your tonnage. Hit every target that you attacked and has attacked you with this initial shot, nothing like causing 6 nuclear anarchies to ruin someones CN week. Follow it up with more cautious attacks on their now dead armies. Being sent defeat messages from a nuclear rogue is just dumping salt in the wounds. Also buy a few more CM's and lob them over, missile attacks are still fun (plus you have your sats to increase damage). Step 8: Laugh some more as 1 opponent gets to send you a defeat message that reads: "You have lost 0 soldiers, they razed 0 land, and destroyed 0 infra" If you kept your tech (up to you on if you want to keep it or not, I vote yes but it's a personal preference) then you will lose 5 tech... but other than that you get to cackle as your enemies literally can't do anything to you. Always wait to pay your bills until you have been put in bill lock. Your bills will mostly be soldier costs and nuke upkeep costs, so as you use up your soldiers and nukes your bills will go down. So hold off on paying the bills until you HAVE to pay them. Step 9: I am guessing you have specific targets in mind that you want to hit, so over the next few days so you can spread your nukes out on those select targets. Remember to keep sending defeat messages and CM's, also keep paying those bills (all like... $100 of your bills that you have) and always keep your troops deployed. As long as your troops are deployed they can't touch your monies and can't do anything more than send 1 defeat message per day (which doesn't matter cause there is nothing left to kill). Depending on how much of an !@#$%^& you want to be, keep either 3 nukes or 6 nukes back in your arsenal. Step 10: Send some final pm's to your "victims." Keep em lighthearted and good natured, this is a game and you should be having fun. When you delve into the "YOU ALL SUCK I HATE YOU!!1!one" messages then really your opponents have won, cause they drove you from the game. Keep your dignity and let them know you are leaving on your own terms, not because they messed up your head. Be creative here but keep it clean and fun. Step 11: Last day before war expires, personally I would save 6 nukes for this day, but some may only have enough nukes to save 3. Drop your nukes on your enemies as a parting gift, ensuring yet another 5 days of nuclear anarchy to remember you by (by now your enemies will probably be in bill lock and even more pissed that you are still able to do stuff). Step 12: Profit! (You are deleted, move on to other things and don't bother ever logging back into your CN nation) So there you have it, a 12 step program for nuclear rogues. Nothing bothers me more than incompetence and I have seen a LOT of incompetent nuclear rogues lately. You folks really need to get your act together... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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