Generalissimo Versus all of China

[Generalissimo]

Generalissimo knew who was secretly responsible for the ongoing attacks on his country. The Chinese might try to wash themselves of responsibility, but no secrecy is perfect. The truth is incontrovertible, malice may attack it, ignorance may deride it, but in the end; there it is. . . or a metal plate in the man’s head allowed him to decipher [i]‘classified’[/i] communications.

[b]Thread Rules[/b]
All posts must contain in character conversation (there’s an out of character thread for a reason)
I will blatantly god mod - in this thread Generalissimo always survives whatever’s thrown at him!
Mechs (maybe Zakus?), not that it will help, are entirely acceptable
Outside of Generalissimo’s awesomeness, those who oppose him, and Triyun’s response, the rules of CNRP still apply
The rules don’t apply to Generalissimo and the people he fights
No interference from, unless explicitly requested and deployed by Triyun, Molly’s Goat

[b]Out of Character Stuff[/b]
This is not canon, cannot be canon, will never be canon
This is the only action with OOC reasons I’m taking against Triyun

[Generalissimo]

[center]The following message arrived simultaneously to all nations and media outlets worldwide[/center]
[center][img]http://i182.photobucket.com/albums/x251/CyberNationsStuff/Laptop.jpg[/img][/center]“I am Generalissimo, the same Generalissimo who had gone missing in Arctic waters while searching for Queen Cybil who had also vanished in Arctic waters, reports of my death were inevitably exaggerated. My identity can be confirmed by voice analysis, fingerprints, footprints, DNA samples, hair samples, beard samples, blood samples, retinal scans, dental castings, hand castings, and face castings -all fresh- sent to every country in the world.

My vast intelligence network has determined that the Virtus International private military company, sponsored by the United Federation of the East, is responsible for the underhanded ongoing assault on Procinctia. I can no longer tolerate chaotic situation in the Bering spiraling further out of control – I’m immediately intervening.

Generalissimo, once Generalissimo of Procinctia, declares war on the United Federation of the East. Asian operations will be carried out by a new temporary command, [i]Generalissimo United Federation of the East Expeditionary Force[/i] (GUFoEEF), to be launched right now from my deployments from [i]right behind you[/i].

Following the success of earlier Procinctian one-man foreign expeditions [i]Generalissimo United Federation of the East Expeditionary Force[/i] will consist solely of I, Generalissimo, and a C-130’s worth of supplies. There are millions of them and only one Generalissimo therefore, in accordance with the [url="http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/ConservationOfNinjutsu"] Law of Conservation of Ninjutsu[/url], my victory is assured. To make this a fair fight the United Federation of the East, international community, and anyone else who asks will receive regular updates of my progress, status, and geographical position.

I’ not a terrorist, I have no demands, I only declare intent, and today I intend to kill the entirety of United Federation of the East’s government -and anyone who dares stand in my way- with my bare hands. I’m also coming for the Virtus International, and maybe Ireland, when I’ve finished in my business in Asia.”

Edited March 29, 2011 by Generalissimo

[Executive Minister]

The Principality of Z-Aeon will take up this righteous crusade against the hegemonist Non-Principality of Zeon. There shall be no Sieg Zeons under our watch in China any longer!

These Zeeks shall pay dearly for affronting the proud Procinctian people. We are also in need of ridding ourselves of a large portion of Nodic Military-surplus... we shall dispose of these tools of war in China. Rest assured, they shall fall.

EDIT: Classified and Totally (like Totally) Canon Movements

Aeon anti-satellite lasers stationed underneath Lake Tana, Ethiopia focus their beams unto a giant disco ball suspended over the Lake by half a dozen C-130 cargo aircraft. The ball, constructed under the guise of commemorating the Nodic fall and subsequent Aeon rule is actually designed to refract these lasers. The effect being that all satellites operated by Asia and her allies over continental Africa are simultaneously blinded/destroyed.

A number of retro-fitted Nodic/Aeonic Apocalypse class Battleships, along with their tender ships previously deployed in the Indian Ocean begin to nuke a path towards China. All subsurface anti-ship defenses are destroyed under purging fire- which is incidentally underwater. The Princess utilizes her immense psionic energies to imbibe the fleets with a holy (unholy arcane power) rendering them completely immune to all harm, while also invigorating them with increased attack speed, infinite munitions reserves, and +1 to their agility.

Accompanying this holy fleet- dozens of cargo ships filled to the brim with unreformable Nodic militants hide under the protective umbrella of the Princess. The cargoships' goals? Beach themselves on Mainland China, crossing over India if they must, to do so. Once beached, they will disgorge their contents via cannon, where the troopers shall gracefully fall to earth via parachute.

Back in mainland Nod/Aeon, thousands upon thousands of Hypersonic cruise missiles are launched toward Bejing, the underground city of Zion/Zeon, and most especially Tibet. A number of these missiles are retro-fitted with MALD capabilities that were NOT copied from Nodic designs for the SEAD-MA missile utlized during the brazen attacks within the Mediterranean orchestrated by Nod. These hypersonic missiles work to jam literally every single source of target designation, detection and tracking - including eyesight - over China.

50 ICBMs take off from beneath the ruins of Addis Ababa. Why 50, you ask? Because 50 is totally not an arbitrary number determined by some online nation-state game (but not that game!) These ICBMs are of an unknown payload type, and reach their targets within China roughly at the same time the fleet in the Indian reaches their targets and the hypersonic cruise missiles are in flight - what a delight!

Double EDIT: OH POO. I didnt read the rules.

Edited March 29, 2011 by Executive Minister

[Captain Enema]

Legion deploys the following units to prepare to assault the forces of evil, who ever the hell they are.

The HMS Rigid, a 32 gunne frigate.
The HMS Ronson, a 44 gunne ship of the 'line'.

The sailors are lean and dangerous looking as their captains and officers get them busy scrubbing decks, splicing lines, and singing filthy sailor songs. The Marines are no where to be found as they are below decks playing a tightly contested game of uno.

[Captain Enema]

The HMS Ronson and Rigid charge their way towards the Indian Ocean at a very relaxed pace. The following message is sent out to all of the forces opposing the tyranny of China (in the spirit of Rebel Virginia), "Well be there in about a year or so, till then our hopes and dreams are with yooooooooooooooooooooooooouuuuuuuuuu!"

[Generalissimo]

[i]Generalissimo United Federation of the East Expeditionary Force[/i] mobile headquarters, C-130 flying full speed (for a C-130) towards Beijing

“Having Nodic Military-surplus, second hand this assistance may be, as back up kind of undermines the idea of one man invasion. . . . yet I reluctantly accept this support from the Principality of Z-Aeon, despite completely deflating my army of one. The smart thing to do, at this point, would be to graciously take whatever I can get - even Legion's frigates. Let’s make this a party! They’ll be beer! Everyone’s invited! I can’t guarantee there’ll be anything left by the time stragglers get here, because this commander cleans house [b]like a boss[/b].” this message was being broadcasting at a full signal strength, transmitted from within United Federation of the East’s territory, right outside of Beijing.

Generalissimo would have ended his outbound call but forgot to turn off the transmitter as he played [i]War[/i] on the cockpit’s sound system, “War, huh, yeah! What is it good for? Absolutely nothing!” Generalissimo sat in his custom velvet pilot’s chair singing along to Edwin Starr’s [i]War[/i] that was blazing deafly over the aircraft’s intercom system. “How could this delightfully energetic melody regularly associated with so many awesome fight scenes alongside fun imagery of America’s war with Vietnam ever be considered to be protesting war itself?”

Edited March 29, 2011 by Generalissimo

[Triyun]

OOC: I'm sorry wut?