Jump to content

Hunting Pirates


Aggressivenutmeg
 Share

Recommended Posts

[b]On board the [i]Dutchess[/i]
Atlantic Ocean,
200 nm of the coast of North America[/b]

Captain Mathew Nellis, opend the door. He stepted out of the cabin and into the fresh morning breeze. He let out an astounding belch, blinked his eyes sleeperly as he began to make his way to the bridge. The [i]Dutchess[/i], was an old Cyclone-class patrol boat, now in private hands. "Wake up ya lazy drunks!" Nellis shouted as he slammed the door open, only to find no one there. "Where the $%&@ are they?"

OoC: join in if you want

Edited by Chernarussia
Link to comment
Share on other sites

[s]The Kraken, hearing the sound of the torpedo's cavitation, followed the strange object with childlike curiosity, staying about 100 meters behind it, when suddenly a loud explosion roared through the ocean, its sound amplified by the water, and hit the poor creature's aural receptors. Enraged and wounded, the Kraken whipped about and did a 180, its tentacles powerfully propelling it through the water, intent on finding the source of the torpedo and destroying it.

It had encountered these sorts of things before, the alien creatures that stalked the waters and belonged to those who dwelled above. The Kraken knew that tearing up their propellers would leave them helpless and draw more to the area like a school of fish, helpless and predictable. If it could pop a hole in the metal creature, the smaller creatures within would escape, and they were weak. Only the familiar, slower ships of times past could be easily thrashed about; these were tougher and needed more force. Many seasons had passed, and the Kraken was yet to kill one of these large creatures that swam within the seas like itself, yet by their very nature were alien to it and thus an intruder on its territory.

They must be killed. The small creatures inside them must be drawn out and crushed between the Kraken's mighty tentacles.

OOC: I'll edit this into a more serious post when Triyun decides to be nice to Chernarussia and let him have fun.[/s]

EDIT: Robert Maynard, one of the crewmen, had also managed to find some wreckage, specifically a piece of the hull with part of the "E" of the ship's name on it. The black-haired, bearded man tried to climb up on it, but it wasn't sturdy enough to support his full weight, so he used it to keep himself afloat while his legs dangled in the water and kicked lightly. He had no firearms on him but clutched a knife in his hand.

"Torpedo?" he said simply, kicking himself over to the captain. "Who woulda hit us like that..."

Edited by Vedran
Link to comment
Share on other sites

OoC: no, no its cool, I like were this is going :P

Nellis sat clutching to a pice of debris, holding a Colt .45 hadgun. [i]Oh $%&@[/i], he though to himself as he sat drifting in the ocean. He was scanning the horizon when he noticed another ship, about twenty kilometers away. He began to swim towards it, [i]never gonna make it[/i], he said to himself, [i]but I might as well try[/i]. After about two hours (it helped that it was moving towards him) he came to the side of the large Mainian freighter, "Hey anybody up there?"

OoC:Timmy offered one of his ships ^_^

Link to comment
Share on other sites

The crew of the SS Ron Burgundy, a container ship filled with all manner of things, had seen the patrol boat explode and gone closer to rescue any survivors. Hopefully any submarines in the area had gone away and left the situation to develop the way it was supposed to i.e. with the SS Ron Burgundy not being sunk in the same manner the first ship had.

The crew launched life boats to bring all the survivors aboard. The first life boat heard someone calling.

"John, there's someone right by the ship!"

"Well get him in here then."

As they pulled the man who had called 'anybody up there' onto the boat, they introduced themselves to him.

"Hello, my name's John Snow, what happened? Get this man a heated blanket and some new clothes damn it!"

The other lifeboats began hauling the rest of the wrecked crew into the boats.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

OoC: aaaawwwwwwww, I wanted the kraken to make an appearance :(

Once the survivors of the Dutchess were onboard the SS Ron Burgendy, [s]Captain[/s] Former Captain Nellis, whipped out his Colt .45 pistol and shouted at the Mainian crew "LISTEN HERE YE LAND LUBBIN' SCUM! THIS BE OUR SHIP NOW, AND WE GONNA LOOT AND PLUNDER THE HIGH SEAS! and perhapse there will be some rape and pillage too, BUT YE ALL GONNA BE OUR HOSTAGES UNTIL YER FAMILIES COUGH UP DA RANSOM!"

Edited by Chernarussia
Link to comment
Share on other sites

The inflatable lifeboat came up to Robert Maynard, who was staying afloat on his "E" hull piece. He put the knife between his teeth and swam out to it. The two crewmen aboard pulled him onto it, and after a few minutes came back to the container ship, the little boat being pulled up by a pulley.

He took the knife back into his hand and walked over to where the captain was. He would have knifed the two crewmen and threw them into the ocean if the captain hadn't announced that they were taking them hostage. So they would live, for now.

OOC: I guess if you want to make this non-canon and everyone involved agrees to it, I can bring the Kraken back. But really, it was just a response to Triyun blowing the boat up.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Henry Woods, armed to the teeth with whiskey, stumbled aboard the newly captured ship. He took a long, deep swig of his nectar, then threw it at the nearest person. WHich was, in fact, actually a pole, but it sort of looked like a person. "Listen 'er ye scurvy scallowags, I'ma gun cut ye throat out if ye don't be behavin' to us and such. Ye best-" Henry woods collapsed, falling asleep with half empty (to him, half empty) whiskey bottles clanking against the floor.


OoC: :awesome:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

The crew of the SS Ron Burgundy all being homosexual immediately started dancing around in joy.

None of them had ever been taken hostage before, and the thought of rape appealed to them very much.

They began doing everything that was demanded of them so they might get picked first.

They would soon point out to the pirates that the ship was only carrying Celine Dion CDs because she was their favourite.

The captain of the Ron Burgundy stepped forwards to introduce himself in it somewhat overly dramatic fashion.

"My name... Is Buttery... George Buttery... I am the captain of this ship... My entire crew is at your disposal... Do with us as you please you big burley man you... Rawr."

He kissed the hand of his captor and winked naughtily.

Ooc: beat that :V

Edited by King Timmy
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Because of his ability to see, smell, hear, taste and touch the real world in his sleep, which some people would say isn't sleep, Henry Woods sprang forward surprised. These men were obviously gay stereotypes, something you only find either in a terrible online roleplaying game or France. But they weren't in either.

"Ye scurvy seadogs ar bes' off avoidin' me whiskey, if ya know what's good for ya'!" Woods growled, oblivious to the past ten seconds. Like always.


OoC: Definetly can't. :v:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

With that, a dozen grappling hooks flew up over the side of the ship and latched on. Pirates started streaming up carrying the flag of their crew.

[img]http://i973.photobucket.com/albums/ae218/mikial21/Vauleyo-BuryatianPirates.png[/img]
[i]Said flag of the crew[/i]

"We are the Pirates of Vauleyo-Buryatia," one of the pirates belted out, "we have but one question for all you. Answer correctly, and we let you go. Answer incorrectly and we rob the ship, then burn the crew, then burn the ship. Now, here be your one question, and you get one answer. What do you think of Marscurian Siberia?"

Link to comment
Share on other sites

[i]"Oh. My. Gosh! I just love Marscurian Siberia! They have such wonderful fashion, they don't seem to be able to do anything wrong with what they wear. It never ceases to amaze me!"
[/i]
Another Seaman agreed with him.

[i]"Oh I knnnnooooowwwwwwww! If they were hear right now I would just have to get their secrets, pity they aren't darling!" He sighed and was silent.
[/i]
Another sailor, Seaman Staines piped up with some information.

[i]"Oh noooooooooo! Guys, we like totally forgot to sign in when we crossed into Maine water! We're probably gonna have some super hunky soldier sailors arriving soon! Oh goody!

And if we're like all standing around here chitter chatting, who's driving the boat?"[/i]

Edited by King Timmy
Link to comment
Share on other sites

"Well now, that happens to be the wrong answer," the pirate said, "you there, fetch some gasoline! We need to make this ship flaming!"

"You mean more than it already is," another pirate said.

"If possible, yes," the first pirate answered, "now who has the gasoline?" Everyone looked to the man to their left and to their right, but nobody had the fuel. "Do you mean to tell me that we forgot the gasoline?" The man to the left of him nodded quickly. "Curses! Back to the boats then. YOU WIN THIS ROUND MARSCURIANS!" As quickly as they had arrived, the Vauleyo-Buryatian pirates had left.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Woods broke open a case of Celine Dion CDs and stuffed sa many in his pocket as he could fit. The rest ended up somewhere, he doesn't keep track of where he throws things.

"Might as well 'ave sum blimmin' thin' if 're gunna rob this ship." Woods mumbled, reading the songs on the back cover.

"Now listen 'ere you seadogs, this 'ere ship and these CDs are mine. I dun get wat you caryyin' so many of the same CDs 'or, but this music 'etter be good o' else." He pulled out his pistol and fired a few rounds into the air to finish his point.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

"OH! MY! GOSH! YOU LIKE CELINE DION TOO! THAT IS SOOOOOOOOO AWESOME! WAIT TILL YOU SEE THIS! OK GIRLFRIENDS, LET'S DO IT!"

He ran into the bridge and hit the large red button marked, super awesome. Immediately the Celine Dion Song "My heart will go on." began playing all across the ship. The entire crew ran to the front of the ship and began mimicking Leonardo Di Caprio and Kate Winslet by putting their arms out to the side. They sang along to every word, pitch perfect and with some superb harmonies.

"NEAR! FAR! WHEREVER YOU A... OMG AN ICEBERG!" Yelled one crew member. This put the entire crew into hysterics, running around panicking.

However, they had no need to panic. Although to the eye it looked like like an Iceberg, it was infact... not.

It was a highly classified experimental littoral combat ship that had been launched not two days ago. When the SS Ron Burgundy had not checked in upon crossing into Maine's waters, they had been sent to assess the situation.

When they were close enough to see that there were armed men on the deck of the ship, they began to formulate a plan to retake the ship. They had personal submarines capable of deploying marines to the ship without being
detected and helicopters capable of providing suppressing fire on the pirates and landing troops on the deck. For the mean time they would watch, and be careful not to collide with the ship so they kept their distance.

They noticed the crew, who unbeknown to them were all in fact trained assassins, had gone into to homosexual cover mode to confuse the pirates. This meant they probably had a shipment of Celine Dion CD's which were probably a cover for their real cargo which was most likely weapons stored in a compartment only the captain of the ship could open.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Former Captain Nellis, who had been standing there bewilded the whole time looked at the 'iceburg' approching them. "$%&@ it! kill 'em all!" he said as he began to shoot randomly at the crew of the [i]Ron Burgandy[/i], hoping kill at least one of them.

OoC: THis thread has made me lol so hard

Edited by Chernarussia
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Woods, of course, had spare pistols in his pockets, which seemed to go on forever. He pulled his gun out and shut the nearest man four times, which was a pole. The bullets ricocheted off the pole and hit his whiskey, causing him to go into a fit of rage. He threw two whole cases of Dion CDs overboard, and shot at multiple crew members. Hopefully he wasn't holding the gun upside down.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

In all the chaos, Captain George Buttery jumped through a hatch off the deck of the ship. No-one else followed him, they were probably all dead.

He ran to the room that stored the weapons they were transporting and unlocked it with the retina scanner, however he forgot to lock it behind him.

He took two of everything. MP5s, Desert Eagles, UZIs, double barrel sawn off shotguns, and M4s. He slipped on a tactical bulletproof vest and filled it with ammunition and grenades.

He heard shouting and men running his way and realising he had not locked the door he jumped in an empty closet in the room to ambush anyone who entered, most likely with a James Bond style quip after he killed them.

Two men entered the room and looked around but saw no-one so they let their guard down for a second too long.

Buttery jumped out of the closet and emptied two Desert Eagles at the men before they had a chance to raise their weapons towards him.

OOC: [url="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_XBajK1gwRQ"]Theme Song :V[/url]

He stood there, his pistols smoking from the end of the barrel, empty and still raised.

[i]"I guess you could say I'm out of the closet... mother$%&@ers."[/i]

He left the room and began to make his way back to the deck to liberate his ship. He tossed away the empty Desert Eagles and equipped the two MP5s.

He rushed through the corridors, opening fire in bursts with each MP5, one at a time.

He quickly cleared a route to the deck, leaving thousands of bodies behind him. How they all got there in the first place, he would never know. He could only assume their spawn point was bugged with a trans-dimensional spawning bug that sucked unnamed expendable mobs onto the ship.

But never mind that right now. He reached a hatch that led to the upper deck, kicked it open and jumped onto the deck of the ships two fully loaded MP5s in hand screaming...

[i]"Any of you !@#$@#$ pricks move, and I'll execute every mother$%&@ing last one of ya!"[/i]

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

 Share

×
×
  • Create New...