Horatio Longworth

"Was it because I was bad?"

Daddy drove alone to the store to pick up some cigarettes. He must have gotten lost because it's been two months and he's still not back.

I'm fine. I'm not ignoring you all. I'm just taking a break from planet Steve. . . early. RL is very, very, busy for me right now. Good luck to everyone next round. o/

Let's get physicals.

o/ War

*nods in approval* o/

Thank you.

Oh boy, here we go.

Quoted for posterity. Thank you.

Could someone please post the logs of what those nukes look like?

The ground still shook occasionally as the earth rumbled in aftershocks, groaning as if it could deny what was happening. Bars of sunlight cast through the rents in the walls where the explosions of war knocked debris loose. The dead lay everywhere, mostly soldiers, struck down for sport, cast aside so as easily with the effort of a madman pushing buttons. Lord of Darkness wandered aimlessly through the command post. "Where did everyone go?" Lord of Darkness wondered aloud. "I could have sworn there were more people around when I had started." Behind him, the air rippled and solidified into a man clothed in all black. The man looked around in curiosity and stepped carefully to avoid the dead. "Lord of the Darkness," he said, "I have come for you." "Who are you?" Lord of Darkness asked. "Once, I was called Horatio Longworth, but now--" "The guy with the hoplite avatar." By Admin! Is that what people call me these days?!" The man in black cackled. "Nevertheless, you will remember who I am." Someone outside the pattern pressed a few buttons and a new war screen popped up. "You've been fighting for DEFCON 1 this whole round!" Lord of Darkness accused as the memories flooded back to him. "For 90 days, you've been fighting against us!" "You pitiful fool! We have not been fighting for one round, but every round.” The man in black answered with scorn. “--Or at the very least since round 43. I have discovered that with every turn of The Wheel, you and I are destined to fight each other. A thousand battles past and a thousand battles yet to come." Pan-Torac XII declares war on Angmar. #ROLLLOD2017 #ROLLLORDOFDARKNESS #LORDOFDORKNESS

This war was fails to meet what I expected of you two.

But, why?

Wait, what?

IRON steamrollers be like

Hey, the server actually sent the war e-mail in a timely manner this time! o/ war

Hmm. That was too close.

*teeth grinding intensifies* For the curious:

All I see here are a bunch or usurpers. The North seeks to split my kingdom in half. I will not have it. The Casualties Throne is mine by rights! All those who deny that are my foes. o/ war

Very poor form. You're supposed to wait until your target is in anarchy. Very amateur move.

Do I congratulate you guys for the war? Do I complain over not being able to participate? Do I commend you all for the peace? Do I lampoon you for the war's brevity? Do I laugh at the poor timing of everyone involved? Should I act like I'm entitled to an explanation? So many things I could do. Decisions, decisions.

I'm still not 100% sure what's going on.

Most of the people who jump off bridges come to regret their decision at some point. I'm glad you've found a motivation to keep living that's more... constructive. One can still hope that the damage isn't total and permanent.

Ravish the horses! Burn the women! Steal the churches! Good luck to all!

The North vaguely recalls... Anyway, good luck, all.