thebird

A group of idiots thought they could play this round of TE in peace. Our tired, huddled masses, yearned to breath free. Yet before we could even post a DoE, before we could even open embassies, before we could even build a strong foundation for our children-our children's children-for all of the idiots of the world & their idiotic families to come over and take a load off; our peaceful nature, our hint of hope, the thread of prosperity that had woven itself through each and every Idiot, and embraced us in the warm blanket of civilized society; gone; every thing we suffered for, everything we bleed for, everything we sweated for, in an instant was destroyed. NLoN attacked the Idiots. Minding their own business. And what did we do? We turned the other cheek. Just as one has 2 cheeks, so too, did the Idiots think they could shrug off the yoke of oppression, the temptation of plunder, the siren wail of riches; so too did a small group of Idiots, with nothing to their name but hopes, dreams, and the calluses on their hands, realize the world was a harsh place. Because NLoN attacked again. With righteous fury, one blow after another, the covert desires, the operation from the shadows, a dark desire lurked within the belly of the beast. What this great foe coveted was not the same as our Idiots; nah; where some Idiots thought they could just band together, find a common shred of friendship among their ilk, and rub enough brain cells together to realize, maybe the real tournament we were all fighting, were the banter with friends along the way. Suffice to say; these Idiots dreamed of a chance to live and die, suffer and prosper, come and go; all together; all as one; what was once one was now one huge mass of friendship. NLoN destroyed that. Our gullible heros, realize when the attacks wouldn't stop that, without buying arms, without training agents, without marching to the beat of a drum, that peace could not exist. NLoN attacked this lonely group of Idiots, with nothing but their Comrades names, to their names. It would be foolish for our brave heros to fight back. Every shred of decency in the bones of our comrades, cried out like a baby cries out. While NLoN and their villainous leader attacked us, they were under the cover of darkness; a great darkness that concealed the sinister desires of this group of Idiots. They knew their enemies loved peace. They knew their enemies loved prosperity. They knew, NLoN & their wretched King of Lies, knew that this group of Idiots they cornered, so much so loved the solemn silence of a peaceful snow falling upon the homestead. Of the white static of drizzle on the window pane. The blazing passion of fried chicken in a cardboard box. Or perhaps even one day, NLoN knew that this group of Idiots knew the crunchy pumpkins of despair. They made a bet that we loved peace so much. That we would accept all advances. Every insult allowed. Any attacks, shrugged off. Like a great waterfall pouring over a duck's back, NLoN slithered its way up a Tree of Knowledge, secure in the idea that their new target so loved peace, they would sacrifice anything to obtain it. Just as they gave everything to obtain this dream of theirs, no one in the right mind would then disturb this slumber of a dream. No one with 2 brain cells would rub them together to spark a great conflict. Who could imagine that some double oh several small unsolicited attacks, would draw the ire of a calm man. NLoN declared an everlasting gumdrop of war upon this Group of Idiots. Yet if they thought our meat plow-hooks were beaten into bean counters, that every drop of lead was melted down into fish sinkers & silverware, if they gambled that every billy club was locked away under the mountain of despair; they were wrong. NLoN thought we were babes who knew nothing of war. Children who knew nothing of life. Gullible Idiots who believed their lies, and could not see their attacks for what they were. A cry for help. NLoN must be a real group of Idiots if they thought that they could go around messing with anyone and get away with it. NLoN must be feeling pretty stupid. You just messed with the biggest Idiot you ever seen. Because we will take up the challenge once again. You thought you were picking on some shrimps. A group bozo group of nobodies. Some idiots you could push around. Well guess what buddy. You just pushed around an even bigger Idiot than NLoN. And that's saying a lot. We finally will slug our way out from under our smart rock, from beneath our great temple we will squint in the blazing sunlit rapture that is the wider world. In front of God, Country, and The Open World Forum of the United People's of the Lands of the Planet (whatever one we live on); We; the proclaimed & assembled Idiots hereby recognize formally the former declaration by the LonN idiots. We; the proseembled and assclaimed Idiots hereby recognize officially the office of leadership in the alliance hereby known as; "IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIdiots" We; the prosigned and prorated free men submit our paystubs in protest of being forced to go to war, and every day secretly wish that the evil overlords from Mr. Who's band of bandits; hereby known as the oNoL, shall fight until they apologize and surrender. You shall know no fury, like a retirement home scorned. You just awoken the belly of the beast. You New League of Noobs just put a chicken behind every blade of grass. A sleeping tiger who's neck you tried to step on. Realize this mortals; that the Idiots of Idiocy shall never fade from this earth. So help me God. The Biggest Idiot; IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII of House IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII First of his name. The Seventh Son of a Seventh Son. An Atlas of Astrology. The King Idiot; IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII of Clan IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII First of his name. The ranger of this scouting party. A Boulder of a Beauty. The Queen Idiot; IIIIIIIIIIIIIIII of the Lands of IIIIIIIIIIIIIIII First of his name. The bard of the babbling crooks. A Cataract of Curiosity. The Princess Idiot; IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII of the Great llllllllllllllllllll First of his name. The jewel of the people. A Denizen of Delight. The Gender Neutral Idiot; IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII hailing from IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII First of their name. The muscle behind everyone. An Earthquake of Eclipse. Just Basically an Idiot; Javier Emperor of Tenochtitlan First of their name. The Unconquered, The Mighty, The Bronzed. A Flood of Fury. The Court Idiot; Resources Rex Chief Operations Officer of Traders of fine ware First of their name. They have the finest of whatever. A Global Gigachad. The Prince Idiot; IIIIIIIIIIIIIII Primary Administrator of IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII First of their name. The arcane & managerial arm of the organization. The Horizon of Hamfistery. tl;dr NoLN spied on and continuously attacked the peaceful retirement home of some Idiots. So we Recognize war and declare our existence. We will accept their surrender if they wish to apologize for their crimes. We will be in our discord. Watching. Waiting. We consider the group of people lead by Horton the Who to be enemies of all lovers of peace (Idiots) until further notice.

Roman Empire makes a return to Forum I really like this joke. RE declares war on Ordo Paradoxia What is old is new again. RE recognizes hostilities with Tropic Thunder For hitting us while we were busy, like 2 weeks ago, RE now (very late) recognizes hostilities with TT. RE declares war on TT Re already made peace with TT over the RoH, so we are now declaring a fresh war on Tropic Thunder. RE's war with OP & TT This stuff never stays clean. Esp when people don't post nice DoW's. Not sure who dropped the ball there. Let's not think about it. I digress. Roman Empire will declare on OP & TT September 20th, and we're hitting basically all of OP & the top part of TT. We'll then get counters, and hit counters, and then be countered on our counters by counters from OP & TT. In theory. Sorry if this post doesn't have the same high level of quality & statstacular statistics as we used to know back in the day or that I tried to promise you when I made my first big RE post oh so many months ago. If you need to blame anyone, don't blame Adude, don't blame FL, don't blame Paul, don't blame DaRuler, don't blame Xavi, don't blame Wile E coyote, don't blame Bundy, don't blame Wes, don't blame Jason08, don't blame Xineoph, don't blame Highroad, don't blame Tevron, don't blame Gearhead, don't blame Ordo Paradoxia, don't blame NLON, don't blame Tropic Thunder, don't blame Hellas, don't blame Alpha Wolves, don't blame all the wonderful and not so wonderful mules we all rely on and love; blame me. I did it. I wanted you all to know this is my fault. We will fight until you can forgive me for letting things get this bad. Or until you can stand to look at me enough to agree to disagree. Ave! God Emperor Yoonyul; for Rome & Kiwi, Bane of D1, has not signed off on this post, PLS Just KiWi - just a humble OWF poster. Included stats only one time. He never scored. SBN, TogaToga And Paul711; Original Paradoxian, Original Bane of Rome, The hard place & Rock of Rome. Also Samoyed; The Hershey man himself

How can I help you sir? Are you an officer of the law? Am I being detained?

Roman Empire Maybe I'll drop in a speech later. Maybe more stats. But let's at least post some stats, some shout outs, and just put our flag down that we were here, and we had no bubble gum. We had a lot of fun. That's what this was all about. Right guys? Right guys? Roman Victory By Imperial Decrees, with the full authority of everything Roma, by every Emporer, every Roman, and the inability of anyone else to say anything about it: Roman Empires declares their Victory over TE round 57. We brought everyone fun. You're welcome TE Signed-The Romans God Emperor Yoonyul; son of ADude and cousin of Kiwi, PLS, Bane of D1, Romulus-sshi Just KiWi - kiwi; backup Emporer, SBN, TogaToga, Remus-Dono Also Samoyed; The Hersh & The Emperor of Rome, Keeper of Gh0s7, The Senate And Paul711; Original Paradoxian, Original Bane of Rome, The Rock FiredGun; Princeps, Wreckingball, NukedJason twice, NLON foreign contractor, Bane of Wes Bankziez; Kel-Tech, Rabbit Scout Blamange; The Nuclear Scientist. Meep. bwishert; the thief, the Accelerator dagny 38 special; breaks osha standards daily Darksight Oreo; No one knew his favorite flavor :shocked: Eye of Roma Rage; the Stonewall Hershicus; The administrator, Drunk Fly on the Wall JASON8; DESTROYER OF HIREDGUN, LIBERATOR OF TOSH, DRINKER OF BEER, AND KILLER OF TIRES Javier; will nuke you between sets King Evlar; the mystery, a friend Lord of Darkness; Duck Pond's Shadow, The Lord of Darkness Lthawkeye; reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee RoadRash; hiredgun's most hated person, king of counts Velystryx; is Everywhere, Chicken Pot Pie Haven

No one else offers infra removal services so we have to do it ourselves. If someone else was up to the task, I'd cash app them 3m & 50 tech faster than you can say "but wait mr. bird te doesn't have aid except for that one round, also the aid caps are actuall[....]"

Roman Infrastructure & Construction Enterprise We have noticed many of our enemies (someone by the name of babo and I think someone by the name of hiredpun? steveo?) are selling their infrastructure, and then when attacked are selling more. Don't worry! If you're that interested in liquidating your infra we are now offering competitive rates OVER MARKET VALUE. If your concern is your retirement we're more than willing to help put you in a good home. Call 1-800 GOT INFRA :: Just point, and Infra disappears. 1-800 Had Infra works too. For legal reasons both 1-800 GOT INFRA and 1-800 Had Infra are channels on our discord channel that you can request to be added to if you want to use our services. Rookie Numbers We were sitting at like Now we like For those of you who left their ti-83s at home that's a 55% increase in the amount of infra removed. Talk about professional. Or 57814.71 infra as a magnitude of the absolute amount if you think that's more impressive than the stat expressed as a percentage. Expressed as a roman numerical that's LVIIDCCCXIV And I just think that's beautiful Also like 80% more infra temporarily misplaced. But have no fear. It certainly didn't fall into enemy hands. reeeeeeeeee Roman Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeempireeee Signed: The Emporer's of Rome you know who we are. Added as they complain birdshot; the backup quarterback, OMO, SBN, togatoga HiredPistol; Son & Father of Stelios, Bane of Paul, Adude-sshi FiredGun; The non-roman wreckingball, NukedJason, twice, NLON foreign contractor dagny 38 special; breaks osha standards daily

The Might of Rome

I really want to hit 50k land destroyed, and at least 20k tech destroyed. Not sure if enough of that exists outside of Rome, but a man can dream.

Roman Milestone Ladies, Romans, Onlookers, lend me your ears; I would like to take the time to thank the many people who made this achievement possible. That includes every RE member, as well as every person that stood in our way. Over One-hundred-thousand infrastructure destroyed. With only fifteen thousand lost. That's a sixfold return on our investment. I took some time to interview a few of our *friends* who helped us with this milestone. This is what they had to say about RE: I also took the time to ask our esteemed leader of he had anything to say to the world: Very cryptic. I don't understand what he meant either. But I'm sure he will lead us to further heights. Whoever he is. Until next time, please continue to guess who our leader is, and please help us reach further heights. We couldn't have done it without you. Signed The Emporer's of Rome Highroad ; Son & Father of Stelios, Bane of Paul, Adude-sshi Samoyed ; Hersh & Emperor of Rome, Keeper of Gh0s7 KiWi ; thebird, backup quarterback, OMO, SBN, togatoga Paul711 ; The Original Paradoxian, The Original Bane of Rome

*chef kiss* Perfection

We have (right now) 4 The Emporer's of Rome, only one of whom is our Emperor. Please proof read before offering unsolicited advice. Thank you for your concern. In the end we all know who's #1.

Crossing the Rhine So Rome has crossed the Rhine and raided 2 nations who were above the 30,000 NS mark, which we decided after some serious discussion, very serious policy discussions mind you, in our Roman Forum, on our discord. Our Roman discord forum. For the policy discussions. Where we discuss policy. We hit Al Bundy & Complex. Knocked them down pretty good. Hope that'll be fun. We're celebrating crossing half a million NS. Stats provided. Also look at those nuclear weapon numbers. I haven't even bought today. Did I mention that Infra lost:destroyed ratio? Really makes my togatogatoga. Thank you, Signed: The Emporer's of Rome Highroad ; Son & Father of Stelios, Bane of Paul, Adude-sshi Samoyed ; Hersh & Emperor of Rome, Keeper of Gh0s7 KiWi ; thebird, backup quarterback, OMO, SBN, togatoga Paul711 ; The Original Paradoxian, The Original Bane of Rome LoD; The Shadow of the Duck Pond, The Prophet of Oreo, The Lord of Darkness

Roman Imperial Declaration Rome's borders must expand. The treasury demands tribute. The barbarian's must be put down. Civilization must be constructed. Rome declares war on Ordo Paradoxia, for the crime of sitting around, doing nothing, trying to get giant back collects, and not fighting in a fighting game. The rest of our declaration is not as logical; but what is more noble than wanting to fight in a fighting game? NLON, Fellowship, and other assorted friends are being attacked as well. These are less a war than large scale raids since we can not engage any 1 alliance. In this round targets that are soft and have not been heavily fighting are prioritized. Rules of Engagement For the alliances we declare on or that are raided, we will not allow Romans to run the following "dirty ops" No Inciting Gov propaganda. No Inciting Religious propaganda. No Changing threat level. No Sabotaging IRS. No destroying money ops. And no naval blockades. Naval attacks & support are okay. Instances where these types of attacks are run should be brought to our government. We want to slowly return to dirty ops not being the norm, and saved for special circumstances. Come to our discord and ping Highroad or thebird (kiwi). Don't be rude. Tell us who did what operation on whom. If you already have a screenshot post that in a dm. People who run dirty ops are us will obviously invite them in retaliation to the 3rd degree. And we are weapons free against Defcon 1. modus operandi Right now we're the top dog, so we're going to set the rules for our stay at number 1. We don't know yet what the rest of the round will hold, but we encourage alliances to build properly; fight wars properly; don't perform dirty ops; rinse & repeat. You can't fight fun wars if you don't build properly. But if you just try to build you will find your tower knocked down. You should collect together and declare wars with a posted DoW. Stats are always encouraged. Signed: The Emporer's of Rome Highroad ; Son & Father of Stelios, Bane of Paul, Adude-sshi Samoyed ; Hersh & Emperor of Rome, Keeper of Gh0s7 KiWi ; thebird, backup quarterback, OMO, SBN, togatoga Paul711 ; The Original Paradoxian, The Original Bane of Rome

We all knew it. We all wanted it. We all smelt it. This is where I would put a speech. If I was allowed to give one. For now just look forward to me doing DoW's again. Let the salt flow. My doctor doesn't need to know. Consul of RE 2021 -the bird, kiwi