Yes. I too agree that raiding in itself don't drive new nations back, its the way in which they are attacked. I always make it a point to stop the attacks if the other nation makes a request or send me aPeace proposal. If a nation don't respond to any sort of messages or try to fight back then I consider it a field day/week for me but I always try to let something remain so that should the ruler chooses he can comeback and grow the nation. Basically what can/should be done is responsible raiding and a bunch active micro alliances focused on recruiting new nations and turning up the heat in the micro level.