I enjoyed your essay. It was well thought out.
People who don't like war can join a neutral alliance and grow their nation like growing corn. People who like to raid can join an alliance that allows it. People who are more in the middle of the road can join an alliance that is peaceful, but has opportunities for war against rogues and ghosts.
It would be interesting to have a list of which alliances allow tech raiding, which alliances are neutral and which alliances still allow war experience, but at a limited extent. I have no idea which alliances allow what?