Zephir

You know, I like and respect our former opponents in this war, they were quite classy throughout, and it was an enjoyable battle. CN's going to be kind of boring again now that that's happened. If it weren't for treaties and stuff, I almost feel we'd be doing the same thing right now and all. However, I find I am still disappointed. Not because I really want to fight against you guys, or that I want to fight for NPO. Certainly neither. All the same, I remain disturbed that we have actually admitted defeat. I'll be honest, I didn't really see that coming. At all. I dunno, it just bugs me. \o MK \o STA \o NSO \o ML \o DOOM Edited fer contentuation.

What's this I hear about NpO being DOOMed? Have fun kicking their assets, DOOM. It will be a glorious battle to be sure. \o DOOM P.S. Hahaha! Allergy medicine high.

In order to assure that this war ends sooner and with less casualties on the ML side, I have decided to fart in your general directions. This isn't as harmless as it sounds. Breathe deeply, for it may be your last! WAAAAAGH! Eh, right. In either case, party on!

Indeed we shall.

Something like this. Only, you know, with guns and stuff.

Sweet, more fights to go around. If we do go out, this is a glorious way to do it. That said, it still makes me sad. I still like MK. Haven't dealt with STA or NSO before yet. Sure hope they're classy. Wouldn't want my only fun war to be with the MK guy I'm on.

o/ ML! o/ MK! Alas, this battle makes me sad. For I like MK. Hopefully this will be resolved soon and we can tackle other opponents on the same side. Until then, let's do this thing. Likewise, it should be an interesting fight. My hat's off to you all. Good luck.

KSwiss2783 Struck by Terminal Gender Flip! Earlier this week, KSwiss2783, Minister of Foreign Affairs for Molon Labe, was diagnosed with terminal Gender Flip disease, a disease which causes those affected to swap genders, usually at the derision and laughter of their friends. KSwiss2783 has always had a mild case of Gender Flip Disease, causing those that didn't know him to mistake him for the opposite gender. However, the disease took a turn for the terminal last week when KSwiss2783 was hit by a bus full of juvenile deliquents on their way back from high school. KSwiss2783 had this to say about the incident. "Maybe I can get those aliens to abduct me and fix all this," he said. "They seem like they probably could." Local Despot TheShoveler had this to say in rebuttal. "No big loss if you don't," The Shoveler said, cracking a wide grin. "Not like you ever had the correct parts anyways." KSwiss2783 was later seen fantastically drunk in a bar, trying to grab his drink, a Shirley Temple, from the bar and failing. Doctor Patrick Hobkins of the Great University of Isengard has suggested a highly controversial, highly experimental surgery to rectify the Minister of Foreign Affairs' condition. "The risks involved are great, of course," Doctor Hobkins said. "For one thing, it could turn him into an eunich. Or an angry elder god. We don't think it'll turn him into the incredible hulk, but that's only because we felt the risk of using gamma radiation was simply too great." In other news, a juvenile deliquent was caught earlier spray painting profanities on KSwiss2783's mailbox and has been made into a human targetting device for a random one of Glocknation's nukes as punishment.

Aliens Make Deal with Molon Labe! Today, an alien ship, closely resembling the alien ship that visited the Molon Labe MoFA a month prior, was seen above 9mm Heaven City again, this time apparently to trade cargo with Molon Labe's MoFA. Large metalic crates were seen being lowered from the UFO by unknown mechanisms onto large trucks which drove away with the mysterious cargo. More trucks drove up with cages full of noted anti-gun lobbyests and were abandoned by their drivers. Noted anti-gun lobbyest Sandra Bradley had this to say from within one of the cages. "They're gonna trade us to the aliens for alien technology and weapons! I think they're going to dissect us to learn about human physiology or something! But more importantly, they're going to give Molon Labe weapons which they could defend themselves with! And I just can't stand for that kind of thing! Oh shi-" The trucks were then lifted into the alien spacecraft via some unknown method, perhaps the same as was used to lower the cargo crates. Local gun aficionado Ron Perlestein had this to say about the situation. "I can't believe we'd stoop so low as to trade annoying anti-gun nuts for weapons," he says, shaking his head. "Though I will admit, the town square is a whole lot quieter and less annoying now." Local coffee shop owner Les Norman had this to add. "I'm going to go out of business now," he says, crying into his hands. "Those anti-gun nuts made up 90% of my patrons! How will I overcome this loss?" In other news, crowds, celebrating the removal of some of the most annoying residents of the city, congregated in town square to drink, dance, and shoot off their guns. The death toll is already in the hundreds.

Ah, so this is where these go! I wasn't sure, things weren't entirely too clear after the reorg. Thanks!

Zephir to personally produce gas for warfare purposes! Today, Zephir, Minister of Internal Affairs for Molon Labe and administrator of the Isengard province, announced plans to utilize his own natural fumes as an agent of warfare, sources report. Zephir's flattus, specifically banned by the Geneva convention, is known to be 100% fatal to most creatures with a sense of smell, with the odd exception of the German Shepherd, which seems to find the noxious fumes akin to catnip for cats. Zephir has to conduct all of his business in a specially built wind tunnel to prevent accidentally killing those he works with. "That he'd even think of weaponizing it," says Jason Foxkin, shaking his head, "just goes to show just how off his rocker he's become." Even though things have become relatively stable with the saboutage of the '1000 years of darkness' solar shade plan, this new development threatens to throw not only Molon Labe into chaos, but the world as a whole. Just one average emission is known to be enough to kill more than 10,000, and Zephir is capable of producing 100 emissions daily. "We're looking at an unprecedented potential for mayhem and destruction," Hubert Farnsworth of the Isengard Great University says. "Oh yes, great distruction. Now where did I leave my assorted lengths of wire?" Zephir has assurred the world that the gas will not be used except as a last resort. Still, the world is left to wonder whether the slightly less than mentally stable MoIA can be trusted not to unleash his silent but deadly horror on the world.

Yup! ...Wait, what?

Zephir elected Molon Labe MoIA! Millions tremble in fear! Late last night Zephir, self proclaimed Molon Labe Fall Guy and former insane asylum resident, was elected for the position of Minister of Internal Affairs for the Molon Labe alliance under what are suspicious circumstances. Local despot Atrocities had this to say about it. "When was the vote held?" Atrocities demanded angrily. "Well its nice to know that I was cheated out my vote. I wonder who else didn't get the f****** memo that voting was taking place. Would have been god d*** nice to get an announcement. I am f****** disappointed. No, to say that is an understatement. Strike one." Zephir was sworn in shortly after the tally of votes, measured in whole or partly chewed pieces of bacon, was counted. He then proceeded to start making his first acts as MoIA, in accordance with his somewhat dubious campaign promises. "Thank you for electing me," Zephir said at the podium. "I would like to now announce that, as a man of my word, I will now live up to my campaign promises as best I can. However, I'm going to need everyone to meet me halfway on this. First, I require your immortal souls, so as I may traffick them. Secondly, I want to know if you want your eternal pain and suffering "Holy crap it burns" flavored, or if you want it "Where the bloody h*** did my appendages go" flavored. Finally, I would like to announce that the "1000 years of darkness" solar shade plan is well on its way to completion. Should be just in time for the summoning of Cthulhu, in fact." A surprising number of Molon Labe denizens have already agreed to these terms and have turned over their immortal souls as well as eternal pain and suffering preference to Zephir. An even greater number, however, are either fleeing the country or buying all ammo off of Molon Labe markets as assurance against the inevitable horde of demons Zephir will end up bringing in. "I knew it was a mistake," local woman Trisha Lionheart was quoted as saying. "But no one thought he was serious! I gotta, I gotta go." Indeed, this is a dark day for Molon Labe, and a dark day for humanity as well. In other news, the results of the election. Molon Labe Government: MoIA: Zephir MoWaD: OD45 MoFA: Kswiss2783 MoTaF: Bast4rd Congress: Pepper ThatFalGuy Oedipus Rex Spinr Psychic Bacon

Molon Labe Flag starts spontaneously moving! Thousands Injured! Earlier today, Molon Labe's flag, which up until now was incapable of independent motion, spontaneously started moving on its own while on display in the national mall in Helloistan, Trapista region of Molon Labe. The resulting beautiful waving motion of the flag immediately tore apart the support columns to which it was lashed, resulting in the entire national mall collapsing inward on itself. No one has been reported killed, but the injured number in the thousands, including Molon Labe Congressman ThatFALGuy, whom was giving a speech on Second Amendment rights at the time of the incident. Local woman Monica Primrose had this to say about the event. "It was just standing still... Then it started to sort of start to move in a waving motion," she said, an expression of terror still on her face. "At first it moved sort of stutteringly, but then boom! It started waving in full and the pillars it was attached to just came right down on ThatFALGuy, whom was making a speech on something or another. The horror..." Local man Gordon Frohman had this to say on the matter. "It was like it was ... a load bearing boss or something. Once it started moving, boom! Everything was gone." Congressman ThatFALGuy escaped with only minor injuries despite his proximity to the event. He was seen clawing his way out of the rubble with only minor scrapes and bruises. Local man Gordon Frohman had this to add with regards to the congressman. "And then he pulls himself out like one bad*** mother******. But not as bad*** as I am of course. But then, no one sees it when I'm bad***."

o/ Molon Labe! o/ SCORN! o/ Pants!

Sure, why not. *bump*

Thanks for the bump, and here's another.

Bumping this up to the first page so that it'll actually be seen.

My offer from the previous thread still stands. We could use someone with recruitment and diplomatic experience, and there are government positions open for these. We're a small alliance, but we're growing. I don't know if you would define us as respectable, but I would like to think we are. We're also a protectorate of the Mushroom Kingdom, so there is that as well. Any other relevant information should be contained in the following link, and if it's not, I'm always available for questioning. http://forums.cybernations.net/index.php?showtopic=9596

Flag of the Auroran Empire The Auroran Empire is a new, growing alliance, protected by the Mushroom Kingdom. If you're looking for a warlike alliance, we're probably not who you want to join. If you want to get free aid and then leave, don't bother joining. But if you're interested in being in a relatively safe alliance with fun members and the protection of a large alliance, then we just may be what you're looking for. Sign up today on our forums! It's a quick and easy process, and you'll be gotten to within 24 hours tops. If you have plenty of game experience, there's also positions in our government open for those interested. All that's required is an interview with me on IRC, and I'll decide if you'd be the person for the job. Click here to visit the Auroran Empire Forums! Or click here to visit our Wiki page! Chat me up on irc.synirc.net in the channel #aurorans if you have an IRC client! Charter of the Auroran Empire Article One: Membership and Fealty Joining: All potential members of the Auroran Empire are to be asked to identify themselves via the following aspects: Nation Name, Nation Leader, Team Color, Resources, and a link to their nation. Nation name, leader, and link are for purposes of identification and screening, whereas team color and resources are for purposes of trade matching and assistance. Based on any of the above aspects, an adviser has the right to reject an application to the alliance. The leader may reject an application without reason. Also, nations that are involved in wars during the time they ask to join must settle any and all wars prior to joining unless otherwise specified by the Thurokiir or Mundokiir, to avoid dragging the alliance into a war. Members: All members of the Auroran Empire, by their acknowledgment of the terms and conditions implicit with their application, and their acceptance into the alliance, swear complete cybernations loyalty to the Auroran Empire, on pain of being zero infrastructured (ZI'ed) should they fail to be loyal. This means that all former allegiances are considered null and void; anything beyond requesting that an alliance be helped in some way will be considered treasonous, warranting potential expulsion or ZI'ing of the offending nation. Disloyalty: Disloyalty is defined as any action detrimental to the Auroran Empire, such as initiating unauthorized wars, attacking a member of the alliance beyond ordered assaults and wargames, assisting nations and alliances that are currently enemies of the Auroran Empire, or performing actions detrimental to an alliance close to the Auroran Empire. The punishment for such actions is entirely up to the Thurokiir, with advisement from the advisory cabinet. This punishment can range either from economic sanctioning to ZI'ing, depending on the severity of the offense. Article 2: War and Attack Policies War: All actions of war are to be approved by the Thurokiir or Mundokiir, unless a nation has been assaulted by another nation unduly, in which case said unduly assaulted nation, by Auroran Empire decree, is to attack the attacking nation until said nation either sues for peace or is ZI'ed. They may call for assistance in this endeavor if said nation is more powerful, and this request must be granted. The only exception to this decree is when an alliance threatens to become involved in a war, in which case the attacked nation must submit his or her case to the Thurokiir for further instruction. Unsanctioned War: Any attack by a nation of the Auroran Empire that is not the result of an order from the Thurokiir or Mundokiir, or the retaliatory strike of an attacked nation, is considered an unsanctioned attack. Official policy for such an attack is to either let the attacked party take their damage repartitions from the attacking nation if the attacked is stronger, or to weaken the attacking nation until the attacked nation may take their damage repartitions from the attacking nation. Nuclear weaponry: Nuclear weaponry, unless used as a response to a nuclear attack, is only to be used on the Thurokiir or Mundokiir's order. Unsanctioned use of a nuclear weapon is subject to punishment, anywhere from economic sanctioning to ZI'ing. Spies: If a nation of the Auroran Empire is attacked or spied upon, then it is the attacked/spied upon nation's duty to return the favor as they see fit. If a Auroran Empire nation is attacking (as per alliance request), then they also have a duty to use their spies as they see fit upon the enemies of the Auroran Empire. Outside of these conditions, any use of spies is treated in the same manner as unsanctioned use of a nuclear weapon, and is subject to the same punishments. Article 3: Spying on Other Alliances Spying: The Auroran Empire does not condone the use of spies within its ranks. This is mainly due to the fact that spying has led to repeated alliance wars within cybernations, and generally doesn't yield anything exceedingly useful anyway. Being Spied Upon: The Auroran Empire generally doesn't mind being spied upon, as we generally do not have anything interesting to share. Our policies are quite open, and our private info, such as it is, is beyond the reach of any spy that can't simply retrieve information by force. Info Shared Accidentally or by Defectors: Any info we find by accident or that is shared with us by a defector is not considered to be spied info. We do not ask for spied info from any defecting members, nor can we control what someone lets slip. We can't close our eyes and ears all the time. If feasible, any info found out in this matter will be noted to the parties whom the information is privy, and we'll do what we can to keep the information under our collective hats. Article 4: Alliances to Other Nations and Alliances: Alliances to Other Nations: Alliances to other nations are constituted by a said nation requesting an alliance with the Auroran Empire. This entails that they may be given aid when they need it, and that they give aid to the Auroran Empire if they should need it. Such alliances may be canceled at the whim of the Thurokiir. Alliances to Other Alliances: The same conditions as alliances to other nations applies to alliances with other alliances. That is, they may be given aid when needed, and they give aid to the Auroran Empire should they need it. Such alliances may also be canceled at the whim of the Thurokiir. Article 5: Policies on Tech: Tech Trading: Tech trades within and without the Auroran Empire are of course allowed. In short, we don't care, it's your business. There is naturally a priority that should probably be given to Auroran Empire nations, what with the fact that any trade deals renegged by a Auroran Empire nation will be sumarily dealt with by the Auroran Empire (something that can't necessarily be said for trades outside of the alliance, given that we can't necessarily do anything about it in some situations) but beyond that it is totally up to you. In fact, you can even ignore inter-alliance trades if you so choose; just know that they're probably safer than trades outside of the alliance. Tech Raiding: Ooo, touchy territory for some. In either case, the Auroran Empire has this stance on tech raiding: Any tech raid attempts against a Auroran Empire member will of course be met with as much force as can be brought to bear on the tech raiding nation. This goes with the clause of helping out other nations and whatnot. Tech raiding by a Auroran Empire member is, by and large, not supported. Official policy on it is as such: A nation to be tech raided must be 12 days in non-attendance to their nation, and must have, at 5 days non-attendance to their nation, be sent a PM stating that if they are in fact active, they should PM your nation stating so, and otherwise they will be considered a target for tech raiding by you. So, while tech raiding is technically possible in the Auroran Empire, failure to conform to these conditions will of course be considered an unauthorized attack. If the nation sends a return PM of any form, they are to be considered an active nation and not to be attacked. If they send a message after you tech raid them, you must pay them any repartitions they ask for, without assistance from the Auroran Empire If they attack back, it is considered that they are taking repartitions from you directly. Alliance Member Ranks Regular Members: Regular members are those members that have joined the Auroran Empire, having agreed to the membership conditions and having been accepted into the alliance. They are subject to the alliance rules, but are otherwise free to do their own thing. They come in two varieties. --Initiates: Initiates are new members of the alliance that have yet to prove their abilities at cybernations. Simply, they are new to the alliance, cybernations, or both. --Veterans: Veterans are more seasoned members of the Auroran Empire. They know the ins and outs of the cybernations system, and possibly have seen some combat in the service of the Auroran Empire. War General: A War General is a member who oversees Auroran Empire campaigns, should the Auroran Empire find itself at war against other nations or alliances. Their duties are to coordinate strikes against enemies of the Auroran Empire, and ensure victory with minimal cost. Advisers: The alliance advisers serves as the advisory cabinet to the leader. Their duty is to advise the Thurokiir on various decisions, as well as to manage various functions of the alliance, depending on their station. A member may hold more than one advisory position. Advisory stations are listed as such: --Diplomatic Affairs Adviser: The duties of the diplomatic affairs adviser is to keep touch with alliances and nations diplomatically tied to the Auroran Empire and to cement ties with said alliances and nations. They also are to seek out other alliances with which the Auroran Empire has no ties to, such as alliance or war, and approach them with alliance propositions. They are also in charge of discussing peace settlements with alliances and nations the Auroran Empire may be at war with, and taking the proposals to the leader. --Graphical Adviser: The duties of the graphical adviser are solely to create and maintain graphics for the alliance, including forum and other graphics. They are to advise the leader on such matters. --Resources Adviser: The duties of the resource adviser are to assist nations that request trading assistance find adequate trades either within or without the Auroran Empire, with weight placed on nations within the alliance. They are also to advise the leader on matters regarding resource trade. --War Adviser: The duties of the war adviser are to ensure that the War Generals coordinate their campaigns among one another without interfering with each other's campaign. They advise the leader as to what courses of action are favorable in wartime. --Monetary Affairs Adviser: The duties of the monetary affairs adviser are to make sure that nations that need start-up funding or wartime aid get it. They are also to advise the leader in matters of funding, such as what nations need funding and how much. --Non-Cybernations Adviser: The non-cybernations adviser, as the name suggests, is an adviser that is not actually a member of cybernations. This person has but one duty, to advise the leader on cybernations matters without any bias. They are purposefully not exceptionally active, and only partially informed at all times so that such unbiased advice can be given by them. --Recruitment Adviser: The recruitment adviser's duties are to seek out potential new members to the alliance, and ask them to join. They advise the leader by telling whom wishes to join, as well as any information they know about said persons wishing to join. This position's duties, on the chance that a recruitment adviser is not present, are delegated to the diplomatic affairs adviser. Additionally, advisers will come in two forum administrative flavors. High advisers, whom will have administrative access on the Auroran Empire forums, and regular advisers, whom will not have administrative board powers. This is mostly for security reasons, given that I'm not a very trusting person when it comes to board privilages; at least, not on an invisionfree board, where things can be changed willy nilly. This may change if I ever decide to upgrade the hosting. Don't hold your breaths. Assistants: Assistants assist the advisers in their given tasks. Like advisers, they come in several 'flavors'. There may be any number of assistants tied to an adviser. There are a couple fields in which an adviser has no assistants, being as another rank classification effectively acts as their assistants, such as the War Adviser and the War Generals. Like advisers, a member may hold more than one assistant role. --Diplomatic Affairs Assistant: Diplomatic affairs assistants are tasked with the job of assisting the Diplomatic Affairs Adviser build and maintain relationships with other alliances. --Graphics Assistant: Graphics assistants help the Graphics Adviser with their graphics works. --Resource Assistant: Resource assistants help out the Resources Adviser decide which trades would be benefitial to other people. --Monetary Affairs Assistant: Monetary Affairs assistants are mainly tasked with helping the Monetary Affairs Adviser send out assistance to other nations that need them. They also may help the Monetary Affairs Adviser decide which nations actually need funding. --Recruitments Assistant: Recruitments Assistants help the Recruitments Adviser bring new people into the Auroran Empire. Mundokiir: The Mundokiir is essentially the military head of the auroran empire. This person is, in effect, an adviser, but also has official control over the Auroran Empire when the Thurokiir is indisposed. They are also responsible for ensuring that any orders that the Thurokiir issues are carried out, and basically helps make sure that everything is running smoothly. In effect, they are a second leader of the alliance. They are considered part of the advisorial cabinet for matters where the advisorial cabinet are involved. Thurokiir: The leader of the Auroran Empire. They are in command of the alliance's war efforts and all other matters. They take advice from their advisers; however, ultimately, alliance decisions are theirs alone. Alliance Elections: Adviser's Assistant Elections: At any time, an election may be called to elect an assistant to an adviser. There are no conditions beyond that the person must recieve a majority vote and the person in question must be recieved by the adviser in question. If the adviser does not believe they would make a good assistant, then they are within their rights to reject the assistant. Adviser Elections: Being as advisers are, in effect, the hand selected cabinet of the Thurokiir, elections for advisers shall not be held. If a new leader should ever take control of the Auroran Empire, they are at liberty to select their own cabinet of advisers. Thurokiir Elections: It would be foolish of me to think that I can please everyone. However, it would also be foolish of me to even think I can please most people in all situations. So, elections for Thurokiir of the Auroran Empire will be held as such: All votes must be made by actual, approved members of the Auroran Empire. The current Thurokiir and his cabinet of advisers may not vote in the election. There must be a 5 to 1 majority against the present Thurokiir for the Thurokiir to be evicted from their position as Thurokiir and the reins to be handed to the new Thurokiir. If the current Thurokiir refuses to give up the reins, the rest of the Auroran Empire is obliged to destroy the current Thurokiir's nation militarily, and if necessary, make a new forum. Making of a new forum should only occur if I myself become corrupt, however, as I will be holding on to the alliance forums' root account if I am ousted so that I may see to the election results being upheld.

Well, since you put it that way... Why don't you join us at the Auroran Empire? I could use a recruitment and diplomatic affairs adviser. Basically means I'll end up roping you into doing most of the recruiting and diplomacy for the alliance. Will that stretch you enough for your tastes? Auroran Empire Forums Link

No takers? Oh well, bump all the same.

And another bump, just for the hell of it.

I bump this in the name of cheese!

If you want an alliance that is currently under 10 members and while not black team doesn't mind if you are on the black team or not, then why don't you check out the "What Would John Moses Browning Do?" alliance? Our cybernations forum recruitment thread: http://forums.cybernations.net/index.php?showtopic=4197 Our forums: http://z7.invisionfree.com/WWJohnMosesBrowningD