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About Claude

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    the destroyer

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  1. FTW: DM, how much damage did it do to my companion? DM: 1. Argent: Only? I thought it took a few swings? DM: It tried. It has a -3 attack and no weapons proficiency. Only one hit actually landed. CLAWS: Maybe we can befriend it. Is it cute? DM: It had a charisma of 6. It's pretty ugly. CLAWS: Nevermind. Let's kill it FTW: No, let's just teach it a lesson and let it go. Legion: Do you think it'll learn? FTW: I'm feeling generous. I hit the goblin with the flat side of my blade and say, "I'm feeling nice, so don't come back, okay?" DM: The goblin's constitution is pretty weak, and it squeals and nods, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry," sobbing, and runs off. FTW: OK, we're done here. Let's go. DM: A few minutes later, the goblin returns with two snarling friends. FTW: I thought we had an agreement? DM: They don't understand. Argent: I cast tongues and explain that we don't want to hurt them. DM: They don't understand. Argent: Why not? DM: -5 Intelligence modifier. GATO: But I've never met creatures with so many negative modifiers... Maybe we don't have to... DM: Too bad. They rolled a 6 Wisdom check and decided to attack. Legion: How are you rolling so poorly? DM: I didn't. I rolled an 11. They have -5 wisdom. Anyway, in spite of your forgiveness and attempt to let them go unharmed, they charge blindly at FTW. Roll For Initiative
  2. I knew you'd come back for more spankings.😉
  3. legum servi sumus ut liberi esse possimus

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