Hi, folks, welcome to another infrequently updated edition of the Scorched Earth Top 10, the list that showcases the biggest heaps of radioactive glass where nations used to be. Let's get down to business.
THE GRAVEYARD OF ARMIES: It's worth noting that the top 10 is filling up FAST with the corpses of wars since expired. The most destructive war on record is one of today's active conflicts, but the list is rapidly getting clogged with bodies. To get this top 10 I had to scroll past 26 expired wars. What this means is that we may be reaching the peak of destruction in this conflict. We're now recording a full 7 days of destruction in each war, and even for fighters of this calibre, conflicts on this scale will take it out of you. Our number one war for today (which I'll come to further down the page) may be the high water mark (or should that be high blood mark?) of the conflict. On future days, I'll try and report on the all time number one as well as the day's winner.
Anyway, the wars:
10. Matasumouri (The Imperial Order) vs CubaQuerida (Umbrella) 43,098.81 NS destroyed (92%/7%)
Straight out of the "what was he thinking?" file, Matasumouri has a number of disadvantages in this conflict. For one thing, he was punching upwards an insane amount to even touch CubaQuerida. For another, CubaQuarida is also in a war with Matt Miller, and it's fairly clear who gets the nuking duties out of those two. As such, Matasumouri is catching one overpowered nuke a day in addition to other attacks, and has a limited amount of firepower to lob back. This war has another day to run, and I have the feeling Matasumouri will be glad to be out of it.
9. han fei zi (Filipino Heroes) vs OTTOTTO (DOOMBIRD DOOMCAVE) 44,204.52 NS destroyed (58%/41%)
The first appearance ever by the one man alliance that is Filipino Heroes. I love the eccentrics in wars like this. One man armies, insanely powerful microalliances. Even Zulu. I love Zulu. They're having FUN with the game, and I think a lot of people have forgotten how. Otto holds a decisive advantage in this conflict, nonetheless, but as the war doesn't expire until the tenth, we've got a lot to see from both of these guys.
This marks today's first appearance by DOOMBIRD DOOMCAVE. Not that I'm counting that for any special reason.
8. Matt Miller (Independent Republic of Orange Nations) vs Xavii (Umbrella) 45,340.92 (21%/78%)
If Cyber Nations were a sit com (and let's face it, it is), Matt Miller and Xavii would be applauded when they came in like they were Cliff Clavin and Norm. Two stalwarts who have been turning each other and everyone else radioactive this whole war. Xavii is by far getting the worst of this particular encounter, in part because of a size disadvantage. This is Xavii's only war currently, but he has had a string of bloody conflicts that have previously made the top 10. I have a feeling he'll be back.
7. HHAYD (The Phoenix Federation) vs Telchar (The Order of the Paradox) 45,522.31NS destroyed (57%/42%)
The only Top 10 appearance for either TOP of TPF, this is a fairly clean, fairly even conflict. Both are at about 113k, both are defending in another war, both are their alliance's highest ranked nation currently in a war. There's blood on the canvas, and more of it belongs to HHAYD, but both men can walk away with respect.
6. Methax (DOOMBIRD DOOMCAVE) vs Pbaff (The Dark Templar) 47,382.69NS (9%/90%)
In pro wrestling I think they call this a "squash match". Methax is bigger than Pbaff by a considerable margin, and has been using this size and skill to get some exceptional moves in on his smaller opponent. 42k ns loss on one nation over less than a week is the equivalent of doing a Tiger Driver '91 on the concrete.
That's two wars for DOOMBIRD DOOMCAVE so far. Just in case you were counting.
5. Methax (DOOMBIRD DOOMCAVE) vs Colonel Buno Taso (MOLON LABE) 47,896.25NS destroyed (6%/93%)
If the last war was a Tiger Driver '91, this one is that chokeslam Undertaker gave to Mankind that put him through the top of the cage in their Hell In A Cell match. Methax has a brute force strategy that is causing some extreme damage to mid-upper tier nations. As the war grinds on it will be interesting to see whether this bears fruit. This is Methax's second war in the top 10 (and DD's third).
4. Zhakrin |(Independent Republic of Orange Nations) vs Colin40 (Viridian Entente) 53,138.58NS destroyed (66%/33%)
A brave and admirable assault by this IRON mid-upper tier nation on VE's heavy hitter. I can see the strategy behind this, namely to wear the larger nations down with attrition, but at times it does seem like they're running into the fists of giants and seeing how much damage they can do to the giants' knuckles.
3. Methax (DOOMBIRD DOOMCAVE) vs anagent (Argent) 61,240.27NS destroyed (43%/56%)
A familiar face in an unfamiliar position. Methax's other wars have been one sided squash matches. This one is more like Cactus Jack vs Terry Funk from King Of The Deathmatch 1995. You can give the victory to Methax over anagent, but there's so much blood on the canvas you can't really call the victory clean. Between the two of them, Methax and anagent have clocked up a jawdropping 1.5 million soldier fatalities. Considering that Anagent is a fair few sizes smaller than Methax, this deserves respect. On the other hand, Methax has three wars in the top ten, making him a strong contender for the title of craziest SOB in the war at this moment.
2. Matt Miller (Independent Republic of Orange Nations) vs CubaQuerida (Umbrella) 65,163.43NS destroyed (49%/50%)
I love dead heats. There's something amazing about watching hostile intent and random chance produce almost identical bloodshed on both sides. Matt Miller and CubaQuerida are regulars on this list, and it would take a brave man to pick between them in terms of abilities on the battlefield. I am not that man. CubaQuerida has the size advantage here, but Matt Miller has performed some deadly attacks, giving him a knife-edge lead in NS destroyed. This war has another day to run, so there's still lots of fun to be had here.
1. Katsumi (Anarchy Inc.) vs Commander Bean(DOOMBIRD DOOMCAVE) 73,262.17NS destroyed (67%/32%)
This is DOOMBIRD DOOMCAVE's fifth appearance on this top ten list. Half of the wars on this list have a DOOMBIRD DOOMCAVE combatant. That's pretty impressive, but not quite as impressive as the sheer tonnage of NS blown to pieces in this conflict. 73,262.17. If the land, infra, and tech destroyed in this war were to be combined into a nation, there would be eleven thousand nations in the game smaller than it, and only one and a half thousand bigger. This is a titanic battle in just about the most literal sense of that term. Praise must be lavished on both sides, but the victory must be given to Commander Bean, who has decisive leads in infra, land, and tech destroyed. There's still a day to do in this blood and thunder scrap. Can Bean and Katsumi set the mark against which all other wars will be judged?
Wow, this was a fun list tonight. Lots of blood, lots of doombirds, and some pro wrestling references. See you all next time.