Varianz

Starfox and Sir Edward Sprinkles were both quite enjoyable opponents.

Soooooo you declared war on your MDP partners ally? Right, ok then.

Obligatory brilliant political move.

Not true. The coalition was aware of negotiations, and we would have been fine with LoSS peacing out with no re-entry at all. LoSS didn't agree to that, so no peace occured. Would we have preferred IRON fight for us? Sure. But they'd made it quite clear by then that it was never going to happen.

No one believes that lol. Like, no one. The fact that you have to pretend they do so you can at least maintain the pretense that you followed through at least a tiny bit on your obligations doesn't change the fact that there was no treaty.

But the treaty wasn't cancelled. IRON had plenty of time to do so, and they didn't. Sure, they might have taken a minor hit for seeming to "bail" on NG, but nothing like the hit they're taking for the shit they're pulling now. And who cares that the government lineup is different? Governments change, if that was affecting the relationship, IRON should have downgraded or cancelled the treaty instead of ignoring their obligations. Just because they don't like the treaty anymore doesn't excuse their behavior.

Oh please, your coalition had already demonstrated willingness to do whatever chaining/ghost DoW's (just use Moldavi ffs). No one on our side expected you wouldn't be defended. The last sad grasp of someone who knows how bad they've fucked up, the "hurr u mad". IRON, this is pretty sad.

We're a charming group. Ask LoSS.

Yes Rota, you got us rolled. It was all you. Ardus and Dajabo and whatnot had nothing to do with it. Right guys?

You seem really obsessed with us since you got kicked out. Kinda like Tywin except you're into less ridiculous roleplay.

What I'm finding refreshing about this topic is that we've all stopped pretending that this war was because NSO is super super evil super awesome mastermind alliance that could have single-handedly plotted the war against Polar (Dilber knows allllllllllll), and are tacitly admitting this was about getting to NG and we were the easiest way to do that. That one was getting silly.

This thread...brb peacing out NpO and DoWing ODN.

Which has nothing to do with you. Look, I generally like HB, but damn, putting you that high up...also, love the tears reference, I too remember 2008.

OOC: Massive ASOIAF spoilers below [spoiler]You absolutely did not put Robert Baratheon on the throne. That was a result of Aery's madness, the pre-war alliance building of Rickard Stark/Jon Arryn/Hoster Tully, Rhaegar's folly, and the tactical skills of the rebels. What you did was sack a helpless city after the war had been won, and order the murder of two small children. Good job. You then married your daughter to the victor, something that only happened because there were no other real choices (none of the other great houses had eligible daughters). The myth of Tywin Lannister is one of the most hilarious in the books. You started a freaking war against the Starks when a Stark was Hand of the King, when the whole realm would have bet Robert Baratheon would side with his oldest friend against the yellow haired shits he despised so much. You were amazingly lucky that events transpired to kill Robert, and that Ned Stark was a fucking moron and didn't seize the Red Keep. You were then outmanuevered by a 15 year old boy, who started thrashing your armies left and right. You bottled yourself up in Harrenhal, trapped and unable to move without fear that any action you took would be your end. You just kept getting lucky though. First, a goddamned shadow monster killed the man marching 100k men on your daughter and grandson. Then, Littlefinger saved your ass by convinced the Tyrells to side with you against Stannis, and you just happened to arrive right in time to hit Stannis in the rear- an hour later and you would've been rescuing corpses. But you still had to deal with Robb Stark. GRRM promptly hand delivered you a dozen special favors- first by writing Balon Greyjoy as the stupidest piece of shit ever conceived in fiction, and having him attack the North. Then you had Theon's magical plan to seize Winterfell actually succeed- and cmon, we all know that was fucking insane. 20+ men marching hundreds of miles inland, undiscovered, then seizing a castle with hundreds in it and a couple fucking direwolves? Like, damn. The civilians could have easily overpowered them and gone about their day, but no. Then that ridiculous battle outside Winterfell when Ser Rodrik's army, 4x the size of Ramsay's and fully drawn up for battle, gets slaughtered? Yeah fucking right. What, are Dreadfort men all berserkers? Then you've got Roose Bolton down south, blatantly fucking things up for Robb, and no one's like "gee, Roose seems really good at losing non-Bolton soldiers"? Catelyn Tully, the most suspicious woman in Westeros, doesn't get curious? Fucking christ. Then you managed to talk Walder Frey into this Red Wedding business. Now, don't get me wrong, an amazing piece of writing, but laughably unrealistic. You're telling me that out of all the notoriously backstabbing, ambitious, traitorous Frey's, not a single one had the idea that "hmm if I go to Robb Stark and tell him what's up, maybe I'll get the Twins?". Hell, not even one of the soldiers thought "this information will probably get me a nice fat bag of gold"? Hooooly shit. No. Insanely unrealistic that Robb wouldn't find out about it. Then of course, he dies, and you've "won" the war- by which I mean it was handed to you on a silver platter. This of course also ignores that Lysa Arryn was written for the sole purpose of fucking her family over, that Littlefinger is some kind of magician who knows everything, and your enemies have no luck at all. Plus, your actions in the Rebellion ensured that the last Dany, you know, the girl with three goddamned dragons, wants to slaughter your family to the last. Oh, and your shitty awful parenting guaranteed that your children are out to kill one another, while your deranged daughter rips apart everything you ever accomplished. And of course, your kids were fucking the whole time. Way to go dad![/spoiler] IC: I never knew you Solis, but props for recognizing when it's time to hang it up.

Sanctions could actually be an interesting tool of war if they, and Senators, were revamped a bit. I'd like to see that.

NSO just started a global war and are literally the most important alliance in Cybernations. Also we have Rebel Virginia and Bacon God. Also we're more fun than anyone else. Also joining us will help reduce your bill payments. You're welcome!

You had a good run RIA.

Most of our guys have now left PM, and those were our biggest/most active. Hopefully our numbers reflect that. I'm pleased with our stats thus far regardless.

I'm quoting this so that when you edit it after realizing how silly it sounds we can still laugh about it.

TPF and NSO have had our, ah, differences, but you've once again demonstrated a willingness to stand by allies that need you. Good luck.

Have fun guys!

Kashmir are ok I guess.

The replies are pretty universal contempt for your alliances pathetic flip-flop. I dislike alliances like Polar and VE, but they don't pull shit like this. What you've done is earned yourself a one way ticket to isolation, because no one will want to touch you with a 20 foot pole.

Haha this is the funniest thing I've seen in a long time. oA'ing in on a non-existent treaty the same night your MD partner rolled out to war. Go LoSS!