Ejayrazz Posted September 10, 2009 Report Share Posted September 10, 2009 (edited) A Beginner's guide========================== 1. If you are going to lead an alliance, do not create a thread asking for allies or a possible merger. The old guys already hate how the political system is. You have a better chance scoring with Delta or Big_z. 2. If you represent your alliance, represent yourself well when it comes to diplomatic discussions. Be aware: One man does represent a thousand. Don't cry, its political representation. Don't argue it cause it wont change. 3. Know the difference between a newb vs a noob. A newb is someone new to the game, whereas a noob is an imbecile, though we don't see too much usage. 4. Do not possess EZI lists and deny you have them. Really, its like a pregnant midget tying her shoe; something only reacted to with laughter. 5. Spying is like Gary Coleman fighting Shaq - just dont do it. 6. Do not Begin a thread on the forums claiming to start a secret spy organization. Seriously, you just $%&@ed up the first step before you began walking. 7. Do not Troll mindlessly, then deny any allegations of it. Accept it with pride. 8. Do not call someone a troll merely for having a different opinion than the thread creator. Know the definition before you begin pointing fingers. 9. Do not Fake DoW's. Just. Stop. There are limited exceptions to this rule. Because common sense doesn't exist, we will limit it to: a. Don't do it on April fools. We have 50 alliances trying to be funny, its like taking a !@#$ upside down. Just don't do it. b. If you are professional and use it as a rare thing. c. There is no C. Just stop here. 10. Do not Be biased. Mostly everyone sucks here, but this the pivotal role in the forums' current state of depression. Individuals are biased, therefore they doubt anything the op says, therefore triggering a huge non-essential debate about actions which happened two years ago, which eventually ends up in them debating about debating, which then leads everyone to leave the discussion with the IQ equivalent to Paris Hilton. Unless you're hot and have nude videos, gtfo. 11. We need nice people and arrogant jerks to provide an equilibrium. Just remember that. 12. Have a sense of humor. Most people are over 18 in this game, yet the game's tension is as tight as Megan Fox's (Due to copyright issues, this word was removed). 13. If you see someone doing something wrong (like number one for instance), don't be an assface about it. Kindly inform them. Just because YOU know the game doesn't mean everyone else does. 14. No Self-pity. Sentences like "I know i'm not the most well liked person, but.." or "I understand I get aggressive at times, but". Just stop. Some do this too much and it becomes annoying. Get to the point, leave yourself out. 15. Hand out medals for owning a lvl 9 plane. 16. No Fake deaths. Don't pretend you died in RL, really...it isn't funny. Imagine putting your (Male part) in an electrical socket. Exactly. My reaction was the same. 17. Go on and on about how much harder it is to be a female player. I get it. 18. Do not Insult Tyga's alliance members. Seriously, he will bite you and proceed to put you in a blender with a tattoo of a naked Oprah Winfrey on your forhead. Don't believe me? You'll see. 19. No Infra > Friends. You wont last long. Pixels are replaceable, decisions are not. Understand this. Breath it. Enjoy. Your reputation will follow you, its like a pedophile, don't screw up and cry about it. If you want to hand out free candy in a van, you should have done a better job. 20. Do not go on the green team when GGA is in a good leadership position. 21. Don't go pretending you're someone famous and important when you're not. Chances are that if you need to express your importance, you really aren't important. What I miss? Edited September 22, 2009 by Ejayrazz Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gopherbashi Posted September 10, 2009 Report Share Posted September 10, 2009 I'm thinking some of these should have "Do not" in front of them, unless sarcasm was intended. #6, 8, and 18 come to mind. Also, "Megan" Fox, and I wasn't aware she was copyrighted. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ejayrazz Posted September 10, 2009 Author Report Share Posted September 10, 2009 (edited) Haha. I should pay more attention to the women and their names Edited September 10, 2009 by Ejayrazz Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Space Ghost Posted September 10, 2009 Report Share Posted September 10, 2009 I hope you weren't serious when using Megan Fox as an example when describing the tension in this game... Thats like the completely wrong way to go. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ejayrazz Posted September 10, 2009 Author Report Share Posted September 10, 2009 Couldn't be more serious . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aeternalis Posted September 10, 2009 Report Share Posted September 10, 2009 OP is a troll, disagrees with my opinion. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Space Ghost Posted September 10, 2009 Report Share Posted September 10, 2009 Yeah, was Hard to tell before edits when words like Do Not were missing when coupled with sarcasm... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ejayrazz Posted September 10, 2009 Author Report Share Posted September 10, 2009 (edited) Yeah, was Hard to tell before edits when words like Do Not were missing when coupled with sarcasm... aye. acknowledged. "Do not" guide quickly changed, then rechanged, etc. I don't care if anyone reads it, I want it in writing. Here it is, here I go. Also, hello Space Ghost. Edited September 10, 2009 by Ejayrazz Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scipio Africanus Posted September 10, 2009 Report Share Posted September 10, 2009 I like this guide and suggest that it should be sent to all new nations. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rudekker Posted September 10, 2009 Report Share Posted September 10, 2009 I'm Wellington Q. Rudekker, and I approve this message. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
D34th Posted September 10, 2009 Report Share Posted September 10, 2009 #1 will never change. I do #13, it's funy I lol'd at #18 but there is some true in it but let me fix one thing for you: 18. Do not Insult Tyga's alliance members. Seriously, he will frostbite you and proceed to put you in a blender with a tattoo of a naked Oprah Winfrey on your forhead. Don't believe me? You'll see. And #20 is like say: Do not eat McDonald's in Moscow if URSS come back, but I lol'd. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jack Diorno Posted September 10, 2009 Report Share Posted September 10, 2009 I read your guide and all I saw was 'whinge, whinge, massive whinge'. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Buds The Man Posted September 10, 2009 Report Share Posted September 10, 2009 I LOLed but unfortunately its all pretty valid. Though im not too sure about the Tyga thing. I dont think even he could find enough space on anyones forehead for an oprah winfrey tatoo. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Schattenmann Posted September 10, 2009 Report Share Posted September 10, 2009 18. Do not Insult Tyga's alliance members. Seriously, he will bite you and proceed to put you in a blender with a tattoo of a naked Oprah Winfrey on your forhead. Don't believe me? You'll see. Tyga once took the 20% hit to defend a member when I reported her. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heft Posted September 10, 2009 Report Share Posted September 10, 2009 Since you're already mentioning trolling, might want to add a "Do not ever use the word trolling in a discussion, especially IC - it's against the rules." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Valerius Posted September 10, 2009 Report Share Posted September 10, 2009 Brilliant! 10 and 11 are my personal favourites. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LJ Scott Posted September 10, 2009 Report Share Posted September 10, 2009 lol trolling, aka a counter arguement in CN. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alfred von Tirpitz Posted September 10, 2009 Report Share Posted September 10, 2009 Maybe add something about Sarcasm being a fine art which only a handful can ever truely master. Nothing worse than a Sarcasm attempt going phut. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HellAngel Posted September 10, 2009 Report Share Posted September 10, 2009 Ejay, i love you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Eye Posted September 10, 2009 Report Share Posted September 10, 2009 Since you're already mentioning trolling, might want to add a "Do not ever use the word trolling in a discussion, especially IC - it's against the rules." qft Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
flak attack Posted September 10, 2009 Report Share Posted September 10, 2009 qft Hey, aren't qft's against the rules? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The AUT Posted September 10, 2009 Report Share Posted September 10, 2009 lol trolling, aka a counter arguement in CN. 11. We need nice people and arrogant jerks to provide an equilibrium. Just remember that. You can just see how Ejay's laws of CN are coming true within his own thread. Also, lol Schattenman. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nintenderek Posted September 10, 2009 Report Share Posted September 10, 2009 The OP is obviously a new nation wanting attention. Clearly none of of these rules apply on Planet Bob. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gopherbashi Posted September 10, 2009 Report Share Posted September 10, 2009 Hey, aren't qft's against the rules? So is discussing mod issues outside of the mod forums. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alfred von Tirpitz Posted September 10, 2009 Report Share Posted September 10, 2009 (edited) So is discussing mod issues outside of the mod forums. I see. Forgot to say this earlier, Ejay! you Rock. Edited September 10, 2009 by Alfred von Tirpitz Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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