Icewolf's musings on the real world

If a customer !@#$%*ed them out for putting insufficient pickles on a sandwich, there are two possibilities. Either that customer is a bad person and genuinely doesn't care how you feel, in which case your anger won't hurt them, or they snapped at a bad moment and now feel bad, in which case your anger doesn't make them feel any better or worse.

I'd go even farther and say that someone's negative attitude is more likely to put the customer on edge in the first place, making them more likely to snap.

However, what actually does it achieve and change?

Like any other emotion, it convey's what you're feeling. It's not any more about "changing the world" than kissing the ass of that person who !@#$%*es you out over pickles is going to change the world.

It's actually quite healthy to express anger and not repress it, otherwise it tends to boil and turn into rage.

Rage is the real destructive demon, not anger.

It's all about controlling your emotions. It's not healthy to bottle them in, but neither is it a wise idea to let them spill all around you uncontrollably when it is not to your advantage. We're all at negotiating tables daily in our lives. A sammich maker and the customer are at one. One can show anger while still being polite - that conveys a wish to be treated civilly. That is the purpose of anger in this scenario. Whether the customer or other customers agree is another matter. That anger can also be directed at trying to do something to change the situation. Emotions, when conveyed right, can be used to influence others. Not even an uncaring boss is totally immune to them.

"Use your aggressive feelings, boy. Let the hate flow through you."

I'm angry that, err, never mind.

Being impoverished and especially unemployed is emotionally and mentally exhausting. A lot of times people just don't have the mental fortitude to do anything but wear their resentment on their sleeves. I disagree that it is arrogant and/or selfish. That's really just a blame-the-victim mentality disguised as self-righteous wisdom, like a David Brooks column.

It's not just the direct stressors of a dead-end, low-wage job that create this effect. It's not the rude customers or the horrible boss. It's the constant pressure that comes with insufficient employment or wages. They're not really angry because of the guy that wanted more pickles. The anger is a manifestation of the constant, every-waking-hour worry about making rent, paying bills, managing time. How can there be joy in your life when you are worrying 24/7 about whether you can afford to eat or feed your children tomorrow?

As it happens I read something on this subject the other day in the NYTimes that might take your interest:

http://opinionator.blogs.nytimes.com/2014/06/13/no-clocking-out/

A punching bag or a pair of good running shoes, is a good investment.

A punching bag or a pair of good running shoes, is a good investment.

The recent theory on that as an outlet, is said to exacerbate the anger issue, by training yourself to use violence to "relieve" your stress.

The recent theory on that as an outlet, is said to exacerbate the anger issue, by training yourself to use violence to "relieve" your stress.

Uhh, i would not know about that, i have not punched out anyone in years. Not since my army days at any rate. If i did not have violent video games, my punching bag and my running shoes, it may not be too healthy for my boss.

I thought it was more to do with the fact that training yourself to always let the anger out rather than "bottle it up" is a bad idea as it trains you not to control your anger.

So if your punching bag is a way of letting anger out then it can be a bad thing as you associate fists with dealing with anger.

On the other hand, exercise is generally good for peoples mental well being and releases endorphins making you happy, so if exercise is a way to extinguish the anger that is good.

I definitely know that I was in a less good frame of mind when I injured myself and had to drive to work as I lost the 25 minutes of exercise on the way to work that helped relax me for the day ahead.

There might be some truth to what you say.

For me however the desire to hit someone never comes up. Maybe because i know what a punch can do. I dunno.

And yes exercise is a good high.