As the glorious armies of the nation of Wagglefka push ever deeper into Tyslandian soil, the High Command is holding a thick mustache event to watch the bombs drop LIVE. This is a BYOFB, yes that is Bring Your Own Frozen Burrito, party. Worry not about long lines for the microwave, let the irradiated soil "nuke" it for you!
Those who take objection to the terms of participation, or arrive without mustache or frozen burrito will be summarily swirly-ed and their lunch money taken.
In other news: Although much of the nation's armed forces are engaged fighting the enemies of Wagglefka, the crackdown on the rogue heretic sect known as "The Church of Our Lady who Woos for Yawoo!" is expected to continue. Those that persist in Wooing for Yawoo...ing, and/or still sport a jheri curl are still expected to register at their local Cultural Re-Adjustment center.
Typical adherent to the Woo for Yawoo! ideal: