Mankind has throughout history put effort into visual appearance to look better to others...babes, if you will. Experiments have been made especially with hair to change looks. To grow facial hair (pogonotrophy), has remained a constant in history. There has been a variety of beard and moustache options which have all been popular from time to time. A variety that has been laid at your feet for you to chose your weapon. Will you pick up your sword? your stache of defiance? your beard of honor?
How is something such as hair a weapon? Well for one, it definitely defeats the fact we arent !@#$%^&*ters. Trust me, the worst thing in life is having !@#$%^&* stuck on your upper lip. It is also a sign of dignity, a sign that you are a man, and damn proud of it. A sign of hope in these childish time where noone has a big enough pair of balls ot tell it how it is or defend a god damn ally. Also, what better way to shoot down trolls, haters, and idiots with a handlebar growling back at every post they make? Frightening, I know.
The Roman's with high social status should be shaved. They looked upon people with beard as barbarians, slaves to their fiendishly good looks! Extraordinary is the facts that philosophers of that age refused to shave. The smartest men in history who developed some of the ideas that lead democracy and the free world had no hair? Seems they had it all.
Would you remember persons from history as well without their visual impressions? I think not. Would you remember Attila without his big moustache, and what about emperor Wilhelm the I and II, who had their moustaches, the so called Emperor moustache named after them. What would Mohandas Ghandi been if it wasn't for his moustache? Some hungry Indian who !@#$%*ed too much, thats what. Even Ludwig XIV, who had an majestic wig on his head had a small but suitable moustache witch of course were genuine. I will give you some known names for association Emiliano Zapta, George Clemenceau, Albert Schweitzer, Albert Einstein, Otto von Habsburg , Kemal Atatyrk, Friedrich Nietzshe, Theodor Roosevelt, Salvador Dahli, Maxim Gorkji, Douglas Fairbanks and Clark Gable. What about Jesus? His beard was pretty awesome. If he had a bald chin some would call him a psychopath with a god complex. I know I would Offended? If so, someone needs a !@#$@#$ stache.
Hell bent on evil? You'll need a stache for that. Pull a CB out of no where, and you'll be trolled all the way to the $%&@in' market. Pull it out of a stache, and people will be thanking Jesus, the one with a beard, you didnt point your hair their way. The people that have put their negative impression on history are for example Hitler and Stalin, who also had moustaches. From the wild west you have the famous Wyatt Earp and Doc Holliday who lived their lives on the border of the law, but they both had well trimmed moustache's. Every evil villian from britian had a stache to twiddle after they tied someone to the tracks of an oncoming train. If they didnt, they'd have to walk away awkwardly.
The list of famous people can be long, but I think I have mentioned enough. The people expressed above are an attempt to show the variety of men that wore a stache, pulled it off, and did great things with it. It show's that if you wear a stache it helps you to express your personality to other people in society, that no matter what you do, you shouldnt leave home without a stache.
Image these days of stagnation, and how utterly boring they are. How we cant seem to pull out of it. Yet, a sign of hope is growing right from your upper lip. It is a stache, and wear it proud you shall. For today a few from the Carlos Accords speak up with their dashing good looks. Do they speak for evil? for the good? They chose their path and their stache, and you, as well, if you so chose it, can break out a stache and help restore balance to the world. Or...end the game all together.
/me twiddles stache after tying CN to the train tracks.