The world must prepare. In these cold, dark times, we have seen men and women leave their principles and values behind to dig themselves out of a hole. Their faces ask for sympathy, their lips quiver and their balls find shelter between their thighs. What happened to the men of this game? What happened to the manly persona of not backing down from a fight? We need a change. We need something that will change not only how we look, but how we act...Simply so we can look damn good doing it.
That guy who will drive the extra eight hours rather than ask for directions, Albert Einstein, Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., and the guy who crashes into your car and still makes it out like you did it. They all have one thing in common. A stache. Yes, a simple amount of facial hair can make the best out of any damn situation. Rub it, feel it, touch it, and you'll fly doing it. Hell, your lips cant quiver when you got a stache bent on destruction. Why turn to stagnation, when you can turn to a mirror and go, "Damn!"
Would people remember Nietzsche if he hadn't had a huge moustache? Would you recognize a picture of Hitler if he had shaved off his moustache? I'm sure it would have fooled Uruguayan immigration. Why do people wear such things on their faces? Because a stache means you have something to say, and it comes out one hell of a manly mouth.
Many people use facial hair to distinguish them from a crowd, but what happens when you have a crowd of moustache fiends? Prepare for hell. Prepare for the end. Prepare for Hilter, Stalin, and Hulk Hogan taking a dump on your holidays. Prepare... for the Carlos Accords.
Don't knock it till you ride it. It is a damn good way to better your persona and get frisky with the ladies. For example:
So $%&@ the cream filling, WHERE THE HELL IS YOUR STACHE. CN needs a balance. CN needs a stache.
*brought to you by the frisky pantsless midget of the Carlos Accords