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An Announcement from the Alliance of Arda and Phoenixtopia


Inquisitor Tolkien

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Stalin Tolkien vs. Martians Shamedmonkey

An MADP

Preamble

In honor of the long and checkered history and our deep, abiding relationship, the nation leaders, Tolkien and Shamedmonkey, representing the people of the Alliance of Arda and Phoenixtopia respectively, do hereby ordain this Pact of Mutual Abhorrence and Disdain.

Article I

Both parties agree to abhor and disdain the other party immensely. Both parties agree to save their most vitriolic loathing for the other party, and, consequently, withhold aforementioned vitriol from the other party, and charitably giving aforementioned vitriol to non-signatories.

Article II

Both parties agree to glare at each other regularly, or else shun the other party entirely, except in ordinary, and perhaps extraordinary, situations whereby communication may be hampered by such.

Article III

In the event such communication is not oral or physical, both parties agree to profess our mutual hatred for the other party on a regular basis.

Article VI

If in the event one party is frequently absent, or absent for an extended period of time, from normal or textual channels of communication, both parties are obligated to compensate for the lost professions of hatred with all deliberate speed.

Article IV

Both parties agree that Bob sucks, and Bob indeed has very Big Boobs that Bob in the Bubbly Water.

Article V

Twelve Spitting Llamas, Eleven Long Horned Narwhals, Ten Pots of Tea, Nine Closet Furries, Eight Flying Drais, Seven Vends-A-Stalking, Six Archon Bashings, Five BOBS!, Four Pinko Commies, Three Great Old Ones, Two Boiler Rooms, and a Flying Spaghetti Monster.

Article VII

If either party wishes to cancel this pact, there is an infinity over zero period of time which must elapse from notification to cancellation. This pact is also rendered null and void if either party violates the mutual abhorrence and disdain requirements of this treaty.

Signed for the Alliance of Arda,

~Tolkien, also known as Che Cthulhu

Signed for Phoenixtopia,

~Shamedmonkey, also known as >_< Shamed >_<

Edited by Tolkien
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arent you supposed to command him to dance?

Only if All Hail Tolkienator plays. Also, I quite frankly fear for the safety of all the denizens of Planet Bob if Trevor danced. As for Al, he is nothing without a kilt, and I shall surely not buy him one of those overpriced rolls of fabric.

It is a sad day, for Tolkien will assuredly regret signing this treaty.

I am absolutely unsure that I don't think I won't.

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