A Declaration of War

Citizens of Bob,

It brings great sorrow to see the following behaviour on Bob, everytime someone cheats and steals a little piece of my heart dies...

Now IKEA has always been a kindly and decent alliance, granting honour to our friends, allies and the like. So of course, it was nothing unusual when, a couple of days ago, I to allowed an alliance to merge into us to benefit from our protection and financial resources.

Unfortunately these players attempted to take advantage of IKEA's offer of good will. They spat in our faces and took us as fools. Well now the flat-pack tables have turned, to stop the production of shoddy furniture, and simultaneously signalling our move into the international furniture market, IKEA declares war on the "The Shrouded Nations of Hacksaw" and all supporters currently hiding under our own banner.

Below is the intelligence gathered alerting us to these crimes, showing that they wished to take from us, leave and smirch the good name of our sacred Store house of Cabinets, Beds and those awesome hot-dogs.

A few short side notes...

Thank you to 19thSpecOps for supplying the intel, we appreciate your help and support and you are welcome within the realms of our great furniture store anytime, with a 20% discount on our entire range.

Also we love our Echelon <3


This certificate of awesome is signed by:

Juan, King and Captain Fantastic, faster than Superman, Spiderman, Batman, Wolverine, Hulk and the Flash combined
Matthew117, Queen and Deluxe Transvestite Warrior
Emperor Jason, Minister of Internal Affairs, God of Speed and Incontinence


ts;cr - One small Alliance attempted to rip-off another small Alliance and now they're going to war. Does Bob get any better than this?

What? It does...? :colbert:

Our CB in rough
01[04:32] <Juan[IKEA]> They were going to fold into us
01[04:32] <Juan[IKEA]> We offered 6m per member
01[04:32] <Juan[IKEA]> They sent half of their alliance into ours
01[04:32] <Juan[IKEA]> To gather about 30 - 40 million in aid
01[04:32] <Juan[IKEA]> From which they planned to run back with it
01[04:32] <Juan[IKEA]> and share it amongst themselves
01[04:32] <Juan[IKEA]> Leaving us 30 - 40 mil out of pocket

Hail IKEA! Down with scammers!

o/ war?

Onwards lemmings, onwards!

o/ IKEA
o/ Echelon


OPERATION CRAPSAW IS A GO!!!! HEHEHE Gonna love this, burn them all to hell.

o/ not a treaty announcement

o/ war

I'm so proud of them!

Have fun guys!

Go get 'er done!

Screenshot fixed thank you again SpecOps...

Also hop onto irc.coldfront.net #IKEA



Also thanks to our awesome protectors in Echelon <3

Great War 6! Get ready!

Not a problem hehe. Happy hunting's!

So from what i gather dont trust 19thSpecOps.
That PM you showed doesn't really add anything to your justification for war.

P.S - Is this the same Juan i used to know from a while ago? If it is your better than this buddy.

Knowledge can only grow through sharing

they joined your alliance and maybe didnt like it so left, and some of your folks probably wanted to leave.

Wars are never good. I dont really like the CB

but anyway good luck to both parties. I hope you both learn and gain experience from this conflict

Yes it is and also there is more to it then that simple screenshot...

I'll be glad to talk more to you about it on #IKEA

For what it is worth, that person also PM'd specops about allying to us to avoid IKEA attacking them when they left with the money. None the less, good luck IKEA and all parties involved.

There's nothing wrong with members seeking to form their own alliance, however, your sovereignty is your's to do with as you please; I trust that these leave-takers were stirring up trouble?

Our CB in rough
01[04:32] <Juan[IKEA]> They were going to fold into us
01[04:32] <Juan[IKEA]> We offered 6m per member
01[04:32] <Juan[IKEA]> They sent half of their alliance into ours
01[04:32] <Juan[IKEA]> To gather about 30 - 40 million in aid
01[04:32] <Juan[IKEA]> From which they planned to run back with it
01[04:32] <Juan[IKEA]> and share it amongst themselves
01[04:32] <Juan[IKEA]> Leaving us 30 - 40 mil out of pocket

WAIT A MINUTE! I NEVER SIGNED THIS!?!

Why would IKEA go to war with an Alliance that asked to merge into us 2 days ago, had access to our Government forums, guides and a significant amount of financial resources and planned on running away with the aforementioned resources to further their own break-away Alliance and cause?

Oh, that's right... Because it's treasonous.

Now that you mention it, I do remember approving this

You're in an unusually chipper mood, Matthew.

Nice CB.

Cuz hes evil! under his saint hoodship after all HEHE.

I'm glad you think so <3

Was this really necessary?



I mean i never heard of either of you.

I hope everyone's enjoying the post. Hi, I'm Jesters Hacksaw, the guy supossedly scamming IKEA, even though we didn't recieve any money from them. Also, I'd like you to know that I knew about the attack plans the whole time. That's why I left. He was setting my entire alliance up the whole time. He told my friend not to collect taxes or pay bills for a few days until he got the money, so that when the war started, he'd get into debt and would lose. Now what kind of alliance does that make IKEA seem like? Well, I hope everyone enjoys the war. GOODBYE




































































































































































































































































































































































































-Jesters Hacksaw, (apparent con-artist)

Nor have I heard of you Slevin.

awww you havent


/me thinks someone should declare on him

Maybe you should ask your mum about IKEA.

i asked my mum and she told me that its a furniture place


Edit: here is a linky click here

Exactly, like the greatest furniture place ever. Now you have heard of them, so class is over.

Fine, don't back-collect

And yes, we allow our enemies to infiltrate IKEA before we attack. I mean, when you're dealing with people this good...

....Or it adds a much needed edge to the combat.

One of the two.

That class sucked

Thats the problem with school, you dont always enjoy it but damn you always learn something new.

Pouty much?

Good show IKEA! Flat-Pack treachery near and afar... Swedish Style

I guess...remind me not to go to school ever again

It can be arranged

IKEA you have justified CB to go to war, anyone !@#$%*es tell them to go back to hailing a new treaty.

o/ Be safe, and kick some heinie!

You guys rock.

Interesting.

A hopefully honest and up-front CB for a change.

Good luck folks

30 mil is not worth going to a war for
your alliance will probably spend more money in preparations, reparations and buildup.

If money was that big of a deal why go into a war.

this should have been approached with diplomacy before and if all options were out then war should have been the last resort.
Always keep away from the "red" button

Economic fraud is fail. o/ IKEA! Pick me up a futon while you are at it.

They agreed they would become our members, and plotted against us the entire time just so they'd be able to run back to their Alliance, hopefully with some of our members and money.

It's not a matter of money - They were members, they committed treason, they will be punished accordingly.

Diplomacy will work when welcomed by both sides, but you've already witnessed Jesters Hacksaw say he knew about "the attack plans the whole time". I'm sure that's why they continued to sign up on our forums and join our alliance

Did we need to go to war with a group who has a greater number of nations, in a relative attack-range? No, but we're protecting who we are by showing we won't tolerate anyone messing with IKEA. I guess if you want to interpret it with an ulterior motive, it's to set a public precedent, because it seems it was too much to have expected this minimal standard of respect.

So... Feel free to move on from this, I don't plan on holding you back


Edit: Made it 10% more reader-friendly!

makes more sense, now that you included facts.
well enjoy the booty

30 mil and they never got a nation higher than 3.8k NS?

They're doing something wrong....

There's no proof anyone even took your money. Even your CB seems more speculative than concrete. It's just bad, bad, bad.

I think they found out, before the sign up 30 million was sent

They never got any cash; we're not stupid.

In fact, if you hadn't realised, we know everything...



So... Would I be allowed to join MHA with the intentions of walking away a few days later, having taken resources and members to re-establish the Alliance I merged into MHA two days earlier?

I'm guessing that's a no... Well, seeing as they didn't get to that stage, how about a group plotting to do that?

Then again, you guys know your rules and have expectations of your membership, and likewise with IKEA


And yes, in case anyone else was wondering, we will be justifying the unquestionable all day!

It's not about the money it's about the fact that Hacksaw apparently planned to use an alliance's trust to steal from them. Am I the only one that remembers alliances going to war over stealing things much lesser than money like guides?

It's a matter of principle... Also the point that these guys could easily stroll off to another alliance and then do the exact same thing.

We shant tolerate any fraud like nature regardless of cost.

I don't know who you are, but your war flag is fantastic so please carry on.

I support our friends and lovers in IKEA in their struggle to cleanse CN of thieves and pickpockets.

Good job guys.