Jump to content

Sparta goes for a swim


Recommended Posts

On a really sunny and really hot day, a group of very muscular guys decided to go out for a swim in their sea to cool down.

 

In their birthday suits, of course, because that's how we Spartans roll.

 

But the sea around our city-state was really polluted, due to the recent increased production of nuclear weaponry.

 

So, one of them had the idea of using their really big shields to drift further out to sea, which they thought wasn't as polluted.

 

Another had the idea of using their pointy spears to paddle out further on top of their shields, in the hope of the water further out being less polluted.

 

Unknown to them, though, the water everywhere was polluted due to the increased detonation of nuclear weapons.

 

This notwithstanding, they continued paddling onward and onward, not getting tired at any one point.

 

They paddled so far that they reached some really warm, yet really polluted, waters.

 

There were some nuclear missiles being readied on the shores so the Spartans did what they do best - bathed in the nude and sharpened their spears for battle.

 

According to ancient Spartan tradition established mere seconds ago, sharpening spears is the equivalent of a declaration of war.

 

So, to avoid writing more beautiful prose and to be able to get back to dulling our spears through the bodies of Pacificans, Sparta is honoring its various treaty obligations and declaring war on the New Pacific Order, effective immediately.

 

Signed for Sparta:

WhiteTigger, King

Tim, also King

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Replies 167
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

These end times are quite strange to me. The alliances I long criticized for being lacking in any sort of ambition and existing only to grow and conserve pixels have become some of the few actors left willing to breath some life into this dying world. At the same time the old drivers of war seem to have long run out of steam.

 

Godspeed, Sparta.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

5 minutes ago, Sauron said:

Spartans, happy to fight in the shade along side friends as our enemies arrows blot out the sun. 


"Sorry.. tech corps 'overfed' me so now I'm bloated and the wing span to lift my girth has grown rather enormous." - Maelstrom

Edited by Maelstrom Vortex
Link to comment
Share on other sites

3 minutes ago, Maelstrom Vortex said:


"Sorry.. tech corps 'overfed' me so now I'm bloated and the wing span to lift my girth has grown rather enormous." - Maelstrom

 

How'd that work out for you? You happy being able to do nothing?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 hour ago, Galtian Commune said:

Calling Sparta your puppet on their own DoW post? Brutal lol

 

We need good music for this party. Metallica is the perfect choice.

Edited by Smitty256
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Awww how cute of you to be such willing meatshields while your 'friends' sit behind the frontlines getting drunk, throwing salt at ice cubes and puffing out their chests until they're 'ready' (i.e you've soaked up enough initial damage for them)

 

Honestly you'd think people would've learned by now if they're pawns or not. Good luck all the same to you guys.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.


×
×
  • Create New...