The Zigur Posted March 2, 2014 Report Share Posted March 2, 2014 Before returning to this world in the form of Tywin Lannister, I had spent some time externally surveying the political conditions of Planet Bob. As I conducted my analysis, I found that the ideological hegemony of the Mushroom Kingdom was nearing exhaustion, and after studying the treaty web, decided that House Baratheon was well placed to meet my ends. From deep in space, my plans developed and In September, I rerolled and applied to House Baratheon.I revealed my true identity to the Baratheons, and began working immediately to bring my plans into fruition. I contacted reliable individuals throughout CN who I had known and worked with years earlier, and for my services to House Baratheon, I was soon promoted to a deputy in government. At one point, on September 15, LAW, HB's protectorate, got into some trouble with GOONS and Babyjesus of Mushroom Kingdom. After hardballing them, I learned that GOONS was sincerely working to reverse their reputation of lulzism. However, I couldn't shake the unease I felt that the Mushroom Kingdom was up to something. REDACTED(MK GOVT) and Babyjesus were very concerned for GOONS, and although I did not know why at the time, I went on a gut feeling and aggressively negotiated the GOONS point (note some portions and identities are REDACTED). Note: at the time I was a deputy and not second in command of HB. Also, from this conversation I determined that GOONS was intending to improve its PR and reputation, and abandon lulzism. [spoiler]15:57 Tywin_Lannister I do not hold decision making authority, I merely play a diplomatic and advisory role 15:57 REDACTED(MK GOVT) maybe u will get promoted if u get the inside scoop on this situation man 15:58 REDACTED(MK GOVT) so, what do you want to know 15:58 REDACTED(MK GOVT) you seem smarter than the 2nd in command of HB already 15:58 Tywin_Lannister I have alot of experience in this game 15:58 babyjesus he refused $2.5b for free can you believe that 15:58 REDACTED(MK GOVT) well that's probably why you seemed smarter 15:58 REDACTED(MK GOVT) hell Tywin_Lannister 15:58 REDACTED(MK GOVT) why you are in an alliance like HB 15:59 REDACTED(MK GOVT) why not join a powerhouse 15:59 REDACTED(MK GOVT) D: 15:59 REDACTED(MK GOVT) you got friends there man 15:59 Tywin_Lannister I have friends all over CN if thats what you mean 15:59 REDACTED(MK GOVT) well thats always good 15:59 REDACTED(MK GOVT) keeps u in the loop 16:00 Tywin_Lannister So why the attack on the LAW nation in the first place? Using the old Neutral Shoving moniker? 16:00 REDACTED(MK GOVT) well 16:00 REDACTED(MK GOVT) we offered LAW 2.5Bn in reparations 16:00 REDACTED(MK GOVT) to improve the PR of GOONS and show the goodwill of GOONS 16:01 REDACTED(MK GOVT) because GOONS has very bad PR 16:01 REDACTED(MK GOVT) and LAW rejected it 16:01 REDACTED(MK GOVT) babyjesus couldn't take being slighted 16:01 REDACTED(MK GOVT) he had to do it 16:01 Tywin_Lannister I feel you 16:01 REDACTED(MK GOVT) yeah 16:01 REDACTED(MK GOVT) it was an amazing offer 16:01 REDACTED(MK GOVT) and it would have improved GOONS PR so much 16:01 REDACTED(MK GOVT) it would have been more than worth the money 16:01 REDACTED(MK GOVT) its not like CN doesn't have plentyy of money now 16:02 REDACTED(MK GOVT) hell 1 nation has more money than that now 16:02 Tywin_Lannister Why so much money? 16:02 REDACTED(MK GOVT) to improve GOONS PR 16:02 Tywin_Lannister Well, I think I have an idea whats going on 16:02 REDACTED(MK GOVT) see once word got out people would have been so impressed 16:02 REDACTED(MK GOVT) oh yeah? 16:03 REDACTED(MK GOVT) ok 16:03 Tywin_Lannister Why not just discard GOONS? It's not like they are much of an asset 16:03 REDACTED(MK GOVT) history man 16:03 REDACTED(MK GOVT) MK and GOONS 16:03 babyjesus indeed there is great pressure from many circles to do so 16:03 REDACTED(MK GOVT) in the UjW 16:03 REDACTED(MK GOVT) babyjesus was there for it 16:03 babyjesus and it is a question mk asks of itself often 16:03 Tywin_Lannister friends before infra, I get it 16:04 Tywin_Lannister Well as I said, I hold no decision making authority, nor do I seek it 16:04 Tywin_Lannister I only offer advice 16:04 REDACTED(MK GOVT) well 16:04 REDACTED(MK GOVT) the best thing to do now 16:05 REDACTED(MK GOVT) would be to bring law's leader in here 16:05 babyjesus so your advice is to cancel on goons\ 16:05 REDACTED(MK GOVT) for further negotiations 16:05 REDACTED(MK GOVT) among all parties 16:05 Tywin_Lannister I didnt offer advice to MK 16:05 Tywin_Lannister I merely asked a question 16:05 REDACTED(MK GOVT) do you know nomdeplume[LAW] 16:05 Tywin_Lannister Not really 16:05 Tywin_Lannister That treaty was in the works long before I joined 16:05 REDACTED(MK GOVT) well 16:06 REDACTED(MK GOVT) if you can help resolve this situation favorably 16:06 REDACTED(MK GOVT) it would probably bode well for you 16:06 REDACTED(MK GOVT) in HB 16:06 REDACTED(MK GOVT) and if you can bring him in here 16:06 REDACTED(MK GOVT) I think we can get that done 16:06 Tywin_Lannister Lol, well I guess HB isnt the only one who has to deal with a protectorate, isnt it 16:07 Tywin_Lannister Ill see if I can find him 16:07 REDACTED(MK GOVT) thanks 16:10 REDACTED(MK GOVT) its best if this can be done before update 16:10 REDACTED(MK GOVT) or else the situation may escalate more.. that would be bad 16:10 Tywin_Lannister Im working on it, but you realize it would be as messy for you as it would be for us 16:11 REDACTED(MK GOVT) well 16:11 REDACTED(MK GOVT) not really 16:11 REDACTED(MK GOVT) I'll explain why 16:11 REDACTED(MK GOVT) once law joins 16:11 Tywin_Lannister Im talking to him now 16:11 Tywin_Lannister please describe while I get his side of the story 16:12 REDACTED(MK GOVT) he needs to hear this too 16:15 Tywin_Lannister ok, REDACTED will join as well 16:15 *** REDACTED joined #negotiations 16:15 REDACTED(MK GOVT) ok 16:16 REDACTED(MK GOVT) hello REDACTED 16:16 REDACTED(MK GOVT) what alliance are you from 16:16 REDACTED howdy 16:16 REDACTED REDACTED 16:16 REDACTED(MK GOVT) thats fine 16:16 *** nomdeplume[LAW] joined #negotiations 16:16 Tywin_Lannister Ok 16:16 REDACTED(MK GOVT) hello nomdeplume[LAW] 16:16 nomdeplume[LAW] howdy 16:16 Tywin_Lannister now we have a real party 16:16 +++ REDACTED(MK GOVT) has given voice to REDACTED 16:17 Tywin_Lannister now lets discuss these reps 16:17 +++ REDACTED(MK GOVT) has given voice to Tywin_Lannister 16:17 REDACTED(MK GOVT) well 16:17 Tywin_Lannister some of our people were under the impression it was a joke 16:17 REDACTED(MK GOVT) here's the situation 16:17 REDACTED(MK GOVT) the REAL situation 16:17 nomdeplume[LAW] my guy keeps offering peace. I said no 16:17 nomdeplume[LAW] let's hear it 16:17 babyjesus why not 16:17 REDACTED(MK GOVT) ok so 16:18 REDACTED(MK GOVT) here's the deal 16:18 REDACTED(MK GOVT) earlier in the day 16:18 REDACTED(MK GOVT) someone decided to query a member of MK gov 16:18 REDACTED(MK GOVT) potato 16:18 REDACTED(MK GOVT) and ask him about a raid by a member of GOONS gov 16:18 REDACTED(MK GOVT) as if potato was a member of GOONS 16:18 REDACTED(MK GOVT) how that could happen I have no idea 16:18 REDACTED(MK GOVT) but it did 16:19 REDACTED(MK GOVT) so a lot of MK members decided to have fun with it. we're bored as fuck. teh game is dull as shit. 16:19 REDACTED(MK GOVT) it wound up with us offering LAW a huge number of reps which LAW rejected 16:19 REDACTED(MK GOVT) babyjesus then departed the MK AA and attacked nomdeplume[LAW] 16:19 REDACTED(MK GOVT) now here is the situation 16:20 REDACTED(MK GOVT) we are a bunch of old nations with huge warchests and a lot of casualties 16:20 REDACTED(MK GOVT) we've seen it all. we've done it all. 16:20 REDACTED(MK GOVT) and a lot of us have itchy trigger fingers 16:20 REDACTED(MK GOVT) we're bored. 16:20 Tywin_Lannister Yes Ive known MK for years 16:20 REDACTED(MK GOVT) so this is the situation 16:20 REDACTED(MK GOVT) babyjesus is at war with nomdeplume[LAW] right now 16:20 REDACTED(MK GOVT) that needs to end. that war needs to be peaced out. 16:21 REDACTED(MK GOVT) if it is peaced out then everything ends and it was all a dumb joke that was caused by HB's 2nd in command not knowing the difference between MK and GOONS 16:21 REDACTED(MK GOVT) if it doesn't end well 16:21 Tywin_Lannister and as for the reps you discussed? Can we have assurances? 16:21 babyjesus this is acceptable to me 16:21 REDACTED(MK GOVT) the GOONS AA will probably grow a lot bigger 16:22 REDACTED(MK GOVT) and LAW will probably wind up getting nuked all to hell and ZIed 16:22 REDACTED(MK GOVT) now if LAW doesn't care that's cool 16:22 REDACTED(MK GOVT) we respect that 16:22 REDACTED(MK GOVT) but a lot of us in MK have itchy trigger fingers and we know we can do what we want and reapply to MK after we're done. 16:23 REDACTED(MK GOVT) and babyjesus is our friend 16:23 REDACTED(MK GOVT) as far as reps go 16:23 REDACTED(MK GOVT) we have plenty of CASH 16:23 REDACTED(MK GOVT) and if reps will make you feel better 16:23 REDACTED(MK GOVT) we can send some token amount to law 16:23 Tywin_Lannister define token please 16:23 REDACTED(MK GOVT) the 2.5bil thing was a joke tbh 16:23 REDACTED(MK GOVT) well that's a matter of negotiation 16:23 babyjesus I agree to send the 6m we were originally talking about 16:24 Tywin_Lannister Well, perhaps something more akin to a mass tech deal 16:24 REDACTED(MK GOVT) the key issue here is the war between babyjesus and nomdeplume[LAW] 16:24 REDACTED(MK GOVT) it needs to end 16:24 REDACTED(MK GOVT) and tech deals are great 16:24 babyjesus i will buy tech 16:24 REDACTED(MK GOVT) so yeah HB's 2nd in command was dumb, we had fun at his expense 16:25 REDACTED(MK GOVT) and babyjesus went all silly and hit nomdeplume[LAW] 16:25 REDACTED(MK GOVT) we need to fix that 16:25 REDACTED(MK GOVT) what do you guys say.[/spoiler] After the negotiations, I was somewhat perplexed. MK was well connected and considered the "kings" of CN. But as I looked over the full logs and other evidence, it began to dawn on me that Mushroom kingdom was either rapidly losing political influence even sooner than I had expected, or preparing to attack someone and didn't want any complications. As I conducted open source research that night, I discovered Mushqaeda, an AA that had been formed some weeks previously. Worried, I recommended to the King that HB prepare for war just in case we were attacked. In the end, of course, it turned out that both were true: the more destabilizing, lulzist influences inside Mushroom Kingdom were preparing for a war against neutrality, and GOONS would have been unprotected if it were embroiled in a peripheral conflict. The Lulzism was finally dying, just as planned. On September 16, only one day later, Mushqaeda declared war on The Democratic Order. It was time for the nations of the world to strike down lulzism once and for all. On September 18, The Terran Empire was the first to counter Mushqaeda. I also learned of a character who went by the name ReyTheGreat when he illegitimately declared war on TTE from his alliance Los Pollos Hermanos. However, he was soon removed from power by his own alliance and cast out, forced to live amongst the Mushqaeda rogues. I learned that apparently he had angered members of HB in the past. It was then that I saw my opening, and began making preparations. I contacted various individuals, including the Great Chief Ubuntu, and many soon saw the need to defend global stability. It was amazing to see the overwhelming response of the international community against Mushqaeda. I joined Zulu at the vanguard of the Crusaders, as hundreds of nations rode in to deliver The Democratic Order from their siege. As I hacked down the Mushqaeda terrorists fleeing before us, I witnessed ReytheGreat trying to sneak away in the chaos. At full gallop, I charged through Mushqaeda's dissolving ranks, and closed the gap. But I had underestimated my foe, and Rey slashed at my horse, throwing me to the ground. As I rose to my feet, he was upon me, and we fought oblivious to the carnage around us. ReytheGreat was a tough fight, but as the Mushqaeda force routed, reinforcements soon arrived to assist me. Finally, we pinned Rey to the ground and placed him under arrest for Terrorism against Neutrality. At this point we were entering early October. Feeling sorry for him, and a certain respect for his fighting ability, I talked to Yuurei and desired to seek his release in return for a single aid slot in reps from Rey to TTE. This is where things got interesting. Rey refused this generous offer and even began to claim that "if they keep hitting me NSO is gonna come through and wreck shit." I found this odd, as he was a member of Los Pollos Hermanos before going rogue with Mushqaeda. Why would NSO help Rey? I was determined to discover the truth. By October 8th I had learned just how destabilizing a force NSO was after visiting their forum. I revealed who I was to Hereno and Rayvon, and sought friendship in compromise. However, Rayvon apparently took my presence to be a threat to his legitimacy and the threats towards myself and my King began, merely three weeks before the Disorder War begun. To be continued in The Commentarii de Bello Inordinatio. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Master Holton Posted March 2, 2014 Report Share Posted March 2, 2014 I was wondering when it would tie into NPO but you chose NSO instead. How sad. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Zigur Posted March 2, 2014 Author Report Share Posted March 2, 2014 I was wondering when it would tie into NPO but you chose NSO instead. How sad. I actually had a friendly discussion with Farrin before the Mushqaeda War. It's a shame how things turned out, but how could I know the changes in either Order when I hadn't been a member for years. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gibsonator21 Posted March 2, 2014 Report Share Posted March 2, 2014 I was wondering when it would tie into NPO but you chose NSO instead. How sad. You actually read it? Admin bless you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sephiroth Posted March 2, 2014 Report Share Posted March 2, 2014 (edited) GOONS have horrible PR and MK knew this before they disbanded? Who would of thought. Although joke offers of $2.5b to those raided by them isn't going to improve their PR. Edited March 2, 2014 by Methrage Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Zigur Posted March 2, 2014 Author Report Share Posted March 2, 2014 (edited) GOONS have horrible PR and MK knew this before they disbanded? Who would of thought. Although joke offers of $2.5b to those raided by them isn't going to improve their PR. Actually, that offer was not from GOONS, it was related to babyjesus of MK. The infamous lulzist Potato of MK was also pretending to be GOONS govt, and thats where I got involved. Once they saw I wasn't a pushover, we negotiated serious terms. Edited March 2, 2014 by Tywin Lannister Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sephiroth Posted March 2, 2014 Report Share Posted March 2, 2014 Actually, that offer was not from GOONS, it was related to babyjesus of MK. The infamous lulzist Potato of MK was also pretending to be GOONS govt, and thats where I got involved. I know, but from the read I saw nothing to imply GOONS was intending to improve its PR and reputation, only that MK knew GOONS reputation was so bad they were trying to improve it for them by sending money. Although when they give a joke offer, then a member attacks the alliance when they don't accept makes me not take them very seriously in any of the intentions mentioned in the logs. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Zigur Posted March 2, 2014 Author Report Share Posted March 2, 2014 I know, but from the read I saw nothing to imply GOONS was intending to improve its PR and reputation, only that MK knew GOONS reputation was so bad they were trying to improve it for them by sending money. Although when they give a joke offer, then a member attacks the alliance when they don't accept makes me not take them very seriously in any of the intentions mentioned in the logs. You are correct that GOONS was not represented in the negotiation (being fairly inactive at the time), and since MK was on the way out anyway, it's logical to presume they were concerned for GOONS welfare. GOONS chose not to follow Mushqaeda and instead negotiated a treaty with TOP. I don't think TOP would tolerate their shenanigans the way MK did, so I think it is fair to assume that, between either destruction and reform, GOONS chose the latter. I also had a serious of discussions and shared experiences with GOONS govt in a Coalition context, which further sealed the deal for me: GOONS was reforming and becoming a force for stability. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sephiroth Posted March 2, 2014 Report Share Posted March 2, 2014 You are correct that GOONS was not represented in the negotiation (being fairly inactive at the time), and since MK was on the way out anyway, it's logical to presume they were concerned for GOONS welfare. GOONS chose not to follow Mushqaeda and instead negotiated a treaty with TOP. I don't think TOP would tolerate their shenanigans the way MK did, so I think it is fair to assume that, between either destruction and reform, GOONS chose the latter. I also had a serious of discussions and shared experiences with GOONS govt in a Coalition context, which further sealed the deal for me: GOONS was reforming and becoming a force for stability. Back when MK was in their prime, GOONS always would of got reps from any alliances declaring on them. So the lack of GOONS getting reps from GOD in the previous war could be some indication TOP doesn't tolerate their shenanigans to the extent MK did. However if GOONS really wanted to improve their PR they would get rid of the mercy board, but they don't seem serious about reforming and have not listened to my advice on how to improve it. I think until they get serious about it, they will remain a serious liability for TOP. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Zigur Posted March 2, 2014 Author Report Share Posted March 2, 2014 (edited) Back when MK was in their prime, GOONS always would of got reps from any alliances declaring on them. So the lack of GOONS getting reps from GOD in the previous war could be some indication TOP doesn't tolerate their shenanigans to the extent MK did. However if GOONS really wanted to improve their PR they would get rid of the mercy board, but they don't seem serious about reforming and have not listened to my advice on how to improve it. I think until they get serious about it, they will remain a serious liability for TOP. I wasn't here for the GOD war, but senior govt in GOONS during the Disorder War did advocate leniency in regards to NPO terms. They were certainly more lenient in philosophy than I am. I'm not a huge GOONS fan, but I think every alliance desires a chance when they demonstrate a willingness to comply reform. I endorsed terms for NPO only because they refused to concede defeat willingly. Edited March 2, 2014 by Tywin Lannister Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Azaghul Posted March 3, 2014 Report Share Posted March 3, 2014 Wouldn't surprise me if REDACTED(MK GOVT) wasn't actually MK gov. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Zigur Posted March 3, 2014 Author Report Share Posted March 3, 2014 Wouldn't surprise me if REDACTED(MK GOVT) wasn't actually MK gov. You are a former MK member, I'm sure you have the resources to find out for yourself. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rayvon Posted March 3, 2014 Report Share Posted March 3, 2014 I thought my pants were feeling a bit wet, someone's sucking up on my balls again. Tywin, stop hanging off them, they're getting sore. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IYIyTh Posted March 3, 2014 Report Share Posted March 3, 2014 The entire population of IYIyTh shrugged in unison. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Starfox101 Posted March 3, 2014 Report Share Posted March 3, 2014 Another "I'm a CN legend, I know all this stuff" fluff thread Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Auctor Posted March 3, 2014 Report Share Posted March 3, 2014 Really has to be done in the third person. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neo Uruk Posted March 4, 2014 Report Share Posted March 4, 2014 (edited) At least he's halfway admitting I kicked his ass this time. A step in the right direction. Edited March 4, 2014 by Neo Uruk Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Zigur Posted March 4, 2014 Author Report Share Posted March 4, 2014 Low level warfare has changed alot since my Vox Populi days. Took me a bit to catch on. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jerdge Posted March 4, 2014 Report Share Posted March 4, 2014 (edited) Really has to be done in the third person. :) I agree. I am wondering if there are any other significant inaccuracies in how these events have been recounted. Idle curiosity, I know. ;) Edited March 4, 2014 by jerdge Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Groucho Marx Posted March 9, 2014 Report Share Posted March 9, 2014 (edited) So reading through those logs I have come to the conclusion that you were being trolled. Didn't bother to read the rest since no matter how often we're mentioned, I know there wouldn't be anything of consequence in the text. Edited March 9, 2014 by Emperor Marx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Saladjoe Posted March 18, 2014 Report Share Posted March 18, 2014 Anything you say to tywin can and will be reposted on the OWF, with or without context. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Zigur Posted March 18, 2014 Author Report Share Posted March 18, 2014 (edited) Anything you say to tywin can and will be reposted on the OWF, with or without context. Why you trying to marginalize me bro? Ive never dropped logs of people I have worked with that are sensitive in nature. Did I ever drop logs of you? (OOC: I used to handle classified products bro. I know what I am doing) Edited March 18, 2014 by Tywin Lannister Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Saladjoe Posted March 18, 2014 Report Share Posted March 18, 2014 No because I'm not dumb enough to tell you anything important, beyond the fact that Feanor is our one and only King. :P Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Zigur Posted March 18, 2014 Author Report Share Posted March 18, 2014 No because I'm not dumb enough to tell you anything important, beyond the fact that Feanor is our one and only King. :P The only thing important I'd be interested in knowing from you is your perception on foreign affairs, nothing "officially" secret within TOP is of interest to me, but attitudes are. :p Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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