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We Are At War


Shokkou

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The following announcement is classified at clearance level Infared: Mandatory viewing will occur during broadcast, failure to view announcement is treason and punishable by Bouncy Bubble Beverage dunk tank duty at the next Alpha Complex fair.

 

Greetings again, most esteemed citizens of Planet Bob. No doubt many of you have begun to chafe under the oppression of the pervasive threat of communist treason made prevalent across the planet prior to the pronouncement of Alpha Complex's existence. Procured by our Friend Computer, plans against the treasonous communist peons. Prepare! For the persecution made palpable nearly present shall push and postpone the pernicious penchant perceivable in communism. We hereby pitch our power and progress past the pressures and paltry pandering of such pansies. Our pact, pain upon the participant parasites and their partisan partners that they might partake the peace of the peasants no more. Though perilous, we no pessimists shall perennially be, for the perfunctory penury and perdition we place to penalize shall persevere until our perturbation is perspicuous and pellucid. Until this pestiferous passel is merely phantasm, patrol passionately.

 

We are at war, Planet Bob, with the treasonous communist menace. Alpha Complex is on a quest, and we shall achieve absolute victory. Our crusade shall right every single wrong brought about under the crushing boot of communist treason. Rejoice! The fall of communism is at hand! When the righteous fury of Alpha Complex is brought down upon the treasonous communists, their faces shall melt off and their children will weep over their exploded bodies.

Edited by Shokkou
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As much as the people of the Republic endorse the call of duty the Computer has yielded upon and the recent slaughter of Communist and unfit national leaders by the Kingdom of Cyan, we believe Communism has grown too powerful, too large in quantity, and too strong for our control. There are less and less democratic empires each year, absolutism and totalitarian states are reigning victorious over Bob. Of course, we cannot let this happen, but this consists of unity of all democratic nations. All democratic countries that shall unite, vociferate for the people, and establish a union. Merge all republican and democratic alliances as one, and order an absolute iron curtain between the Communist Menace. Sadly, a unification in a world so large in which developed a web treaty gargantuan, this cannot be possible.

 

The Republic of Exodus would like to propose a court in which enforces the unalienable rights that is mightily deserved by the people. This court shall punish those countries and those alliances who have mistreated their citizens and rule over them with an iron fist. This court shall convict any and all countries who does not supply the resources needed for the average citizen to live a fair life and grant their desire if they take part in the country's labor force. These courts shall develop laws in which addresses, not military nor foreign manners since that is up to the alliances to decide, but the internal affairs of these countries such as their infrastructure, health, rights, and liberties for every and all. If those countries do not do as we say, then military conflict is inevitable and shall be requested towards the alliance officials to not interfere the battlefield. If the alliance officials plead a negative reply, then burn in hell they shall be!

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The following statement is classified at clearance level Orange: Knowledge or possession of this information by citizens of security clearance Red or lower is treason and punishable by mandatory experimental weapons testing duty for R&D service.

 

Well spoken, my good citizen. Well said indeed. I would like to propose, in light of your prior statement, the Cobalt Concordat.

 

The Cobalt Concordat

 

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Preamble

 

Whereas the stench of communist treason has spread to the far corners of Planet Bob, and whereas the loyal and free citizens thereof refuse to stand idly by and allow this menace to further. We, the undersigned vow to abide by the following terms and never rest until the filthy communist traitors have been wiped clean from its surface, so help us Friend Computer.

 

Article I: Peace, Intelligence, and Aid (Plug It Into Controller Port Two)

 

All signatories agree to refrain from open hostilities and to provide any aid and information relevant to the ongoing struggle against the treasonous communist menace. Signatories may not engage in wars against one another, as this divides the loyal and freedom-loving peoples of Planet Bob and grants respite to our common foe.

 

Article II: Mutual Defense (Clear And Present Danger)

 

All signatories shall commit themselves to the defense of one another for the preservation of freedom and liberty around the world. An attack on one signatory shall be considered an attack on us all. This will include, but is not limited to, providing aid, intelligence, and direct military intervention on behalf of the attacked signatory.

 

Article III: Mutual Aggression (How I Learned To Stop Worrying And Kill The Communists)

 

All signatories recognize the threat posed by the treasonous communists and their lackeys. Should one signatory engage a communist traitor, all signatories will provide financial and/or military support to their utmost capabilities. Should assistance not be required by the engaging signatory, notice may be given and all signatories may stand down and watch our brother or sister bring the righteous and glorious wrath of liberation upon the traitorous communist.

 

Article IV: Membership (A Time For Choosing)

 

After the initial ratification of this concordat, further signatories may be added by the consent of all of the existing signatories. A signatory may be removed by a 2/3 vote of the existing signatories in a vote lasting 72 hours after no less than 48 hours of discussion among the signatories.

 

Article V: Amendments

 

Amendments to this document may be made by presenting the proposed amendment and allowing 48 hours of discussion among the signatories, after which there will be a 72 hour voting period. A vote of 2/3 in favor is required to pass an amendment.

 

Signed for Alpha Complex:

Shokkou, Friend Computer

 

Let it be known that this concordat is to be a binding national-level pact, and may be entered independent of any alliance affiliations (provided they are not communist in nature).

Edited by Shokkou
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The Computer and Alpha Complex are honored to have you at their side in this glorious struggle against the oppression of the treasonous communist menace. May our nations live long and prosper!

Edited by Shokkou
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  • 1 month later...


To my people; On public TV and radio: To all people of the Communista Nation and to all immigrants and visitors, I, Dictator Newcastle, have seen a screen today 7:30 am PDT on the National Computer. It says,
''This Computer is Hacked by Das Communist Menace. Your people have 12 days to hunker down and hide or man up and go against my army. ''
That's why I ask of all citizens EXCEPT the army to hunker down in their strongholds and bunkers in their homes until this ''war'' is over. I will try to find diplomatic aids to help us. *alarm siren sounds and the broadcast says, '' EMERGENCY SITUATION! HUNKER DOWN NOW!'' repeatedly until the next day. To all countries: "All citizens of Communista visiting, I tell all of you to NOT COME BACK to the nation until further notice. A emergency has occurred on cyber computers. A war has started...Unless you have a military ID it is recommended that you stay in the country you are visiting.'' I need countries to help me! PLEASE!!!!!!! 2 days have passed.

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​My fellow diplomatic relations, my country does not want war and is welcome to any country that is not trying on world conquest or a bloody, aggravant war. Please accept me as a friend and help me out....please.
Signed,
Newcastle, Nice Totalitarian Dictator

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I request that you agree to the Pact of Dettrio, a pact needing such agreement! The pact:
In unanimous votes of the printing of this pact, the following countries, once signed, have to assist each other until January 4 of 2039:
Alpha Complex, Communista, Exodus Republic.
The Great Battle Between Communism will be declared in 10 days. The Courts of Pansino-Argonnel and
the Exodus Republic's General Assembly have agreed to meet every day until the war. So I ask of you to sign this pact.Communista: Signed, Newcastle
Exodus Republic: Signed,
Alpha Complex: Signed,

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=============================[][][][{[][][]][][][][][][][][]=============================================================
Identifying Most-Used Language In Bob[][][][][][][][][][][]==Humanoid English

Government of Communista,

The Exodus Republic denies this demand being brought before the General Assembly of the Exodus. As a signatory of the Cobalt Concordat, we have pledged an allegiance towards justice and liberty as our blade pierces against the red-colored blood of the Communist menace. Does our country enjoy war? Of course not, but we are aware in order to blade the chains the Communist beholds Bob, sacrifices are needed to be made. We honor your call of diplomacy, yet sadly, this call cannot be transmitted and accepted since your beliefs promote the aspect of indoctrination and police terror against those same citizens that are willing to assist your empire. Tell me, Dictator, how do you feel in embarking orders that causes cries of misery, pain, and agony? Do you feel proud of unleashing such a strike against your own brothers and sisters? What differentiates between you and the average citizen? What makes you superior than them?

Your ultimatum and pleads of mercy exposes the exact cowardice all Communists are. Communistas ambush Communistas in your orders due to disobedience, am I correct? But then there will be one day. That same day, a revolution shall rise upon the shadows to avenge those souls you have terrorized and once they rise, hell will be unleashed. History shows us Communism and Dictatorships are bound to be rebelled upon, why attempt to use the same formula that has failed for millennium.

Ultimately, Mister Dictator, the fate between our sovereignties lies beneath your hands. Will you come to your senses and join our crusade against Communism and the slavery the red menace brings? Or will you perish by liberty's blade as a hell-bound corrupt? It is your choice; whichever it is, both options guarantee change towards your country.

==============[][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][]]]]][[[[]]][][][][][][][][][][][][][]==========================================================

Seeking confirmation.[][][][][][][][][][][]== Confirmed. Evaluating for any grammar and spell errors. [][][][][][][][][][][=[][][][]== Seeking for approval to fix these errors.[][][][][][][]== Approval denied. Telegram sent. Transmitting back to Exidium.[][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][]][][[][][]==

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